DiscussionThat feeling when a TRA you don't trust tries to befriend you out of the blue

submitted by wafflegaffWoman. SuperBi. from self.LGBDropTheT

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[–]TransspeciesUnicornI sexually identify as a mythical sparkly equine 9 insightful - 1 fun9 insightful - 0 fun10 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

I think I just wouldn't respond. He might try to put up a stink about you not responding but if you start talking to him out of a sense of obligation he'll probably just find a reason to label you a TERF at some point, like you said. If he's going to probably cause trouble for you either way you might as well save the time that would be wasted talking to him.

I wonder, does he know you're bi? Could that be the reason why he randomly reached out to you like this? If he knows you're bi then maybe he wants some sort of "kWeEr SiStErHoOd" with you? Or if he's one of "those" TRAs who refuses to date straight women, maybe he sees you as a potential romantic interest, as a "fellow WLW"? I'd definitely be very wary here as well.

[–]wafflegaffWoman. SuperBi.[S] 8 insightful - 1 fun8 insightful - 0 fun9 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

I wonder, does he know you're bi?

I am wondering this as well. It's conceivable that the couple of mutual friends we have could have outed me though I made clear why I wasn't out in that group of people, but I later had to back away from one of the ones I'd trusted with that info because they turned out to be a colossal ass in other ways. So, yeah. There's a slim chance they know. I didn't pick up any hitting-on-me vibes but who knows.

They'd probably try to find out at some point anyway and then it would be an issue, most likely, even if they don't already know.