Because of gender identities like non-binary and anything in between or sexualities like pansexuality or bisexuality, people are able to find a way into the community without putting any effort in, because apparently pronouns don't equal gender and pan or bi people who only intend to date the opposite sex are soo so valid (not an attack on bisexuality, just people like that).

I think there seems to be a fundamental mismatch in worldview between people who live in different areas about what the nature and purpose of a "gay community" is.

Is it a dating pool? A marriage market? A support group? A substitute family? Are strangers obligated to care about you because your family rejected you?

We beat around the bush about this topic on this sub.