BisexualSnowflakes mad for calling a relationship between a man and a woman straight. Actual bi people don't seem to care

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[–]PenseePansyBio-Sex or Bust 5 insightful - 1 fun5 insightful - 0 fun6 insightful - 1 fun -  (2 children)

Well, I hate to be the skunk at the garden party here, BUT... calling a relationship between a man and a woman "straight" is bi erasure. It's as good as saying that being in such a relationship means that you are straight. And yeah, that is significant to bisexuals, since we're always struggling against the perception that: A.] there's no such thing as bisexuality; B.] thus we are actually either gay or straight; and C.] which one is determined by our relationship. Terms like "straight/heterosexual relationship" (or, for that matter, "gay/homosexual relationship") play right into this.

And it's so unnecessary! Just call it an opposite-sex relationship! Puts both heterosexuals and bisexuals on equal footing. Ditto "same-sex relationship": works just fine for gay and bi alike.

I'm also kinda skeptical that there's only ONE snowflake in the posted dispute; given that the other person speaks with approval of "queer rep" (and what those who bandy the Q-word about tend to be like), that thread may well be a veritable blizzard...

[–]jiljol 6 insightful - 1 fun6 insightful - 0 fun7 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

calling a relationship between a man and a woman "straight" is bi erasure

It is simply factual. It's important to understand that "straight" and "gay" can be used to define individuals and the dynamics that can arise between people: "gay man/sex/relationship", "lesbian woman/sex/relationship", "straight person/sex/relationship", etc. You could even talk of "bisexual sex" or "bisexual relationships" when 3 or more people of different sexes are romantically and sexually involved with each other. "Straight", like you have clearly illustrated in your second paragraph, is just a shorthand for "opposite-sex".

[–]usehername 3 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 0 fun4 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

I think the terms are fine as is. When applied to a person, the labels "gay", "lesbian", and "straight" imply exclusivity, as they are qualities of a person. When applied to something temporary like a sexual act, they imply nothing about a person's orientation, only the sexes of the people engaged in the act. The same is also true for relationships. If I call a straight relationship an "opposite sex relationship", that's just the same thing in different words. The word "heterosexual" just means attraction to the opposite sex, and only implies exclusivity when applied to a person, in which case it would be describing their immutable orientation. Sexual orientation labels are mutually exclusive. When a person says they're heterosexual, they mean it as opposed to the other sexual orientations, in this case homosexual and bisexual. A bisexual person experiences both heterosexual and homosexual attraction without being a (/n exclusive) heterosexual or homosexual.