Lastly, how should one ideally respond when straight people try to make homophobia and transphobia into the same thing? Do you think just staying silent the best option? Also in these discussions is it best to try to leave out the fact that you are gay because straight people like to believe that straight opinion is more "objective".

When it comes to people who are super TRA, I'm not sure there's much to be done.

But when it comes to folks who don't know much about the issue and are inclined to go along with popular opinion because they're well-meaning and they don't know any better, I think it is important to talk to them about it. Particularly older liberal straight people. I think that might actually be one of the most tangible things we can do. I think a lot of them feel like, because they're straight, they're not "allowed" to have opinions on these things. They think LGBT is all one big rainbow blob — maybe they're not literally all the same, but they're all alike in the ways that matter, surely. They've probably got a couple gay friends from college, and think that supporting trans stuff is doing right by said gay friends.

And so, as gay and bi people, I think it's really important to explaining to straight friends and family that no, this isn't actually what we want from them as allies, and no, this stuff doesn't help us, and it actually harms us. We need to "give them permission" oppose it.