I find most kinks and fetishes deeply disturbing, but what bothers me the most is that people who engage in bdsm tend to have this compulsive need to tell everyone about it. I suspect some of them are trying to convince themselves it's normal when they go into those long-winded descriptions about it, but I also think there's quite a few of them who get off on making people uncomfortable. It's basically part of their many paraphilias.

I would say it is a good thing that these guys are upfront about their sexual "preferences" (instead of unexpectedly starting to strangle women in bed), but I have this nagging feeling that most of them, especially the ones who talk about it so openly ("I want to slap you and spit on you") during their first date, are doing so because they fall under the "getting off on it" category. They probably really enjoy watching the confusion, horror or disgust on women's faces.