A Surefire Recipe for Celibacy: Publish a Sanctimonious Article Titled, "I’m Trans and Nonbinary: Here’s What I Want Cis People To Know About Having Sex With Me"

submitted by MarkTwainiac from (self.GenderCritical)

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[–]c3ll0 17 insightful - 1 fun17 insightful - 0 fun18 insightful - 1 fun -  (2 children)

Most WLW don't need to be told that sex is other things than PIV. :rolleye: So obviously this young woman isn't aiming this at other women. Sounds like she's a straight girl who's had some inconsiderate partners, not much of experience, let alone knowledge about sex.

[–]yousaythosethings 11 insightful - 1 fun11 insightful - 0 fun12 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

I noticed that as well and thought, let’s be honest about who you really mean. It’s men. Welcome to a common struggle women have with men as sexual partners and, which is often a result of or exacerbated by porn. That’s why I don’t understand why this article was written, and also why I’m concerned about distortion of language that confounds the issues up for discussion and obscures the causes, and, therefore, results in bullshit solutions. Speaking of, I couldn’t get through this article but since it sounds like from comments she’s suggesting people check out “queer porn” as a solution. Um no, so much of exactly what she’s complaining about is perpetuated I’m so called “queer porn” between women and “trans women.” In fact that shit often looks just like run of the mill hetero porn where there is no pretense that the guy is a woman.

None of this is about “cis” vs “not cis” (what even does “cis” mean currently and what is it’s opposite? This lady clearly isn’t trans in any meaningful sense so it sounds wrong to call her such) and adding “gender identity” into the discussion just confounds the obvious.

[–]MarkTwainiac[S] 6 insightful - 1 fun6 insightful - 0 fun7 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Most WLW don't need to be told that sex is other things than PIV. :rolleye: So obviously this young woman isn't aiming this at other women.

Yes, But MLM know that sex is other things than PIV too, obviously LOL.

As for the idea that she isn't aiming this at other women, now that I've thought about it a bit, I've concluded that she is aiming this at other women. Specifically women who, unlike her, don't look upon porn as the best way to learn about sex.

Although I don't watch porn myself, my understanding is that nowadays much of it shows and glorifies hetero sex that doesn't involve PIV, such as anal and blow jobs. As a result, anyone who watches porn presumably already has seen evidence with their own eyes that there's plenty more to sex, even heterosex, than PIV - which as a porn-watcher herself, the author must realize.

Now who is it that watches porn? Boys and men are the biggest porn users, and in many countries today the majority of males - 98% - are said to watch porn. These boys and men come from across the age spectrum as well from all sexual orientations, although the median age of male porn watchers in the US, for example, tends to skew young - median age is 29 to mid-30s. What's more, the research on the subject shows that the majority of males watch porn regardless of their relationship status.

But the situation is very different for girls and women. Yes, today an increasing number of girls and women do watch porn too. But female porn-watching isn't evenly distributed amongst all age groups - it's primarily something younger women and teen girls do, not something middle-aged and older women are into. What's more, the research show that even today amidst porn mania, the majority of women still do not watch porn.

Looking at het "cis" women in particular, it seems the majority of women who are likely to have RL sexual contact with men - meaning women who date men, whether casually or seriously, are engaged or married to or living with men - do not watch porn. And the older a woman is, the less likely she is to be in the habit of watching porn - not necessarily coz she's any less interested in sex than younger women, but coz porn watching has only become normalized and routine since the internet, and unless a girl or woman gets in the habit of watching it young, it's not a custom she's likely to pick up later in life. Also, since most older women have jobs, families, household chores, errands to do, bills to pay, hobbies, political interests, volunteering, social lives and so on filling up all the hours of their busy days, most would be be hard-pressed to find free moments to devote to watching porn even if they were so inclined.

With all this in mind, the only logical conclusion I can come to is that the "cis" people this writer assumes needs to be informed of the (non) earth shattering "news" she so superciliously delivers are hets who don't watch porn. Meaning het women specifically - especially older women as well as women of her own age and younger who are actively dating or in a committed live-in relationship with men.

But funny thing, I'd wager good money that most such women - including the writer's mother, aunts and grans - probably are far more knowledgable about sex than this schoolmarmish writer is. And their knowledge is probably more "valid" and authentic than this writer's coz it comes not from watching porn - queer or any other kind - but from their personal "lived experience" of actually having sex in the flesh with another human being.