I might be able to give you a little insight (obviously it's based on assumptions but it sounds similar to what I went through). So I'm detrans but when I was transitioning there was this metaphorical staircase to "manhood", and it was like everyone was pushing me up it through their snide remarks and judgements (Ultimately it was my lack of self-identity and confidence that made their words hit as hard as they did, but anyways). I did something too nice? That's feminine. Which would send a pang of guilt and shame that I was female. So I would keep upping my "masculine" personality features slowly until I was basically a non-functioning asshole. It was quite the spectacle. I was so afraid of any judgement that I became a judgemental, socially inept jerk to protect myself. As a dear friend once told me, I was a "child wrapped in a blanket of manly plaid" or something along those lines.

It could be what they're currently going through. In my opinion it seems those that are lacking any control in their life and in how others perceive them can get extremely obsessed with how they're perceived to the point of analyzing everything they say before it even comes out of their mouth. I know I did. Obviously it makes conversation a little difficult.

Whew this is a bit embarrassing to admit, haha.