Seriously, why so many hetero women are so masochistic?

submitted by Njklm from (self.GenderCritical)

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[–]FlyAway 29 insightful - 2 fun29 insightful - 1 fun30 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

You have bad self esteem if you don't cover your face with makeup before leaving the house.

You have bad hygiene if you don't wax every hair off your body.

You're not empowered if you don't have cleavage, heels, and skin tight leggings.

[–]fijupanda 29 insightful - 2 fun29 insightful - 1 fun30 insightful - 2 fun -  (1 child)

cause they're taught they have to suffer for beauty, and religions blame them for ebilz, fall from heaven, desire, temptation etc

men enjoy female suffering since they're mostly sadists so women think if they swallow the pain and suffering men will eventually like them or will change their ways which is bullshit

anyways, when everyone ignores and spits on your problems, issues, pain, you learn to self mutilate psychologically or physically from early on

besides, young girls are told: stay safe, cover yourself up, watch out, mind your own business, and boys are told: go out and play.

it's like we're responsible for everything men do to us. and that's ingrained from early on through gender stereotypes, male cloud god religions, media. so you start to hate yourself more, instead of directing that anger at the cause of your suffering.

[–]MezozoicGay 7 insightful - 1 fun7 insightful - 0 fun8 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

it's like we're responsible for everything men do to us

In many Middle East countries it is women's "fault" if men see her and get aroused, it is women's fault if men is cheating or sinful, and so on.

[–][deleted] 18 insightful - 1 fun18 insightful - 0 fun19 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

There's a book called The Myth of Women's Masochism.

[–]MarkTwainiac 16 insightful - 1 fun16 insightful - 0 fun17 insightful - 1 fun -  (2 children)

You using the term clinically? Or loosely?

Re clinical masochism: Research done in the the USA in1980s and 1990s to test the theory that female socialization, punishing beauty standards and the inferior social status of girls/women led women to be masochistic found that it did not. The women studied were found to be far less likely to have masochistic traits than men.

Then, as now, masochism is found much more commonly in men:

https://courses.lumenlearning.com/abnormalpsychology/chapter/sexual-masochism-302-83/

Also, as with all men with paraphilias, men who are masochists tend to have other "deviant" proclivities such as cross-dressing, voyeurism, exhibitionism. At least 30% of men who are masochists are also engage in sadism:

Some sexually masochistic males also exhibit fetishism, transvestite fetishism, or sexual sadism. Masochistic sexual fantasies are likely present in childhood. Masochistic activities commonly begin by early adulthood, tend to be chronic, and the same act is generally repeated. Some individuals increase the severity of the act over time, which may lead to injury or death.

Males are much more likely to take measures to self-asphyxiate whilst masturbating, leading to their death. The names of a number of prominent men who have died this way come easily to mind - David Carradine, Michael Hutchence, Albert Dekker, Stephen Milligan, and possibly Anthony Bourdain. I know of several non-prominent guys who've died this way too. But I've never heard of a woman who died this way.

https://www.psychologistanywhereanytime.com/sexual_problems_pyschologist/psychologist_sadomasochism.htm

[–]ruskiix 8 insightful - 1 fun8 insightful - 0 fun9 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

This is really interesting, thanks! I’m a female sexual masochist (who mostly just avoids that shit because respect is more important than getting off). The difference between the male masochist description here and my life is kind of hilarious. I have even less tolerance for abusive behavior than the women I’m close to because power dynamics stand out a ton for me. The whole “choking/harming themselves in private to get off” must be a testosterone or sex addict thing, it sounds utterly insane to me.

[–]MarkTwainiac 7 insightful - 1 fun7 insightful - 0 fun8 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Yeah, I think the entire theory of masochism - and pretty much every other topic under the sun - is based on studying/observing the behaviors and psyches of males and thinking males represent all of humanity.

Glad to hear you mostly avoid "that shit." Good luck to you, and stay safe.

[–]jkfinn 14 insightful - 1 fun14 insightful - 0 fun15 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

No way is it hetero women, as opposed to others. All women are subject to this because under male supremacy this is what women are--objects. As the second wave started to falter in the late 1970s, it came to be confused with the "sexual revolution" (the myth of women burning their bras, and being independent brassy and sexual) and then was split by the pro-sex movement which made the myth of the sexed woman revolutionary a reality. There were several known lesbians involved in this assault on the second wave and in the 1990s the s-m movement became almost synonymous with lesbian sex, and a small group of lesbians had to arise to counter male-centered objectifying sexuality (or today called sex-positive).

[–]worried19 6 insightful - 1 fun6 insightful - 0 fun7 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Beats the hell out of me. This is the one thing that makes me despise being female. I have never been and will never be a masochist. Fuck society for brainwashing girls to abuse themselves and let others abuse them.

[–][deleted] 6 insightful - 1 fun6 insightful - 0 fun7 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Grooming. I fear a lot of young women are learning that they must abide by men's pornographic-inspired BDSM expectations in order to get and maintain relationships.