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[–]quickbeam 82 insightful - 2 fun82 insightful - 1 fun83 insightful - 2 fun -  (10 children)

I'm so glad I'm not a teenager today. Jesus Christ. I'm not sexphobic, but when I was a teenager the magazines were giving you kissing advice, not encouraging you to perform sex acts which can lead to higher rates of venereal disease, intestinal parasites and things like fistulas which no one should want. I'm not saying no one should enjoy anal sex, but I think there's already way too much pressure on women to perform this from heavy porn consumption.

[–][deleted] 24 insightful - 1 fun24 insightful - 0 fun25 insightful - 1 fun -  (2 children)

The penis is just too dirty. Even the beard swab shows high levels of organism filth. Has anyone swabbed one of those things and saw what grows on a HE plate or MacKonkey dish? BAP anyone?

I looked this up as I was typing. Spoiler alert: Streptococcus, Lactobacillus, Gardnerella and Veillonella

https://www.nih.gov/news-events/nih-research-matters/microbes-men

[–]Comatoast 13 insightful - 4 fun13 insightful - 3 fun14 insightful - 4 fun -  (1 child)

Oh god, I would believe the beards having some absolutely make jesus cry type of nasty shit in them. I don't care how many oils men slosh in those things, they reek and are gross. (I say this knowing that I drop food between my tits and in my hair constantly--I am disgusting.)

Penises are on the outside though.. couldn't they just wash them before sexual activities, like hands? I mean, foreskin is like one of those sticky hands that you get from the vending machine, but it can still be washed.

[–]MezozoicGay 11 insightful - 5 fun11 insightful - 4 fun12 insightful - 5 fun -  (0 children)

like hands?

Some men I know not washing hands even after pooping. So what you are proposing will be too much work for them.

[–]Comatoast 15 insightful - 1 fun15 insightful - 0 fun16 insightful - 1 fun -  (5 children)

Intestinal parasites? Bleeerrggh. You gut wounded me on this one.

[–]quickbeam 30 insightful - 2 fun30 insightful - 1 fun31 insightful - 2 fun -  (4 children)

"Eating ass" is apparently very popular in the younger demographics no matter what combination of genders are involved. No matter what kind of washing is involved that's a pretty good way to pass intestinal parasites.

[–]Comatoast 20 insightful - 1 fun20 insightful - 0 fun21 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

I guess I'm a prude, I forgot about that one. What happened to people using those dental dam things? It uses to be all the rage to promote safe sex, but it looks like now we're mostly just promoting the treatments for unsafe sex or sole use of hormonal contraceptives. Maybe I'm just being dramatic.

[–]slushpilot 8 insightful - 7 fun8 insightful - 6 fun9 insightful - 7 fun -  (1 child)

That and avocado toast, if I'm not mistaken.

[–]quickbeam 12 insightful - 6 fun12 insightful - 5 fun13 insightful - 6 fun -  (0 children)

Avocado toast is delicious and not associated with intestinal parasites. You can make it at home for real cheap too.

[–]worried19 8 insightful - 1 fun8 insightful - 0 fun9 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Why the hell would anyone want to do this?

It boggles the mind.

[–]RestingWitchface 15 insightful - 1 fun15 insightful - 0 fun16 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

And haven't surveys shown that teens today are having less sex than past generations? Many of the kids reading this will not even be sexually active yet, and they are already learning about extreme sex acts...