I absolutely did not. I expressly said bot all women like soaps and never came close to implying it was innate. The whole conversation is about how interests are shaped by social influence. Nothing innate about it.

I apologize for misreading. The mistake is all mine. Sorry.

I mean they literally called me a girl. They feminized my name and called me that for years. But yes that was mysogynistic use of the feminine as an insult.

Again, I am sorry this happened to you. I was not contesting that it happened to you or that it was awful for you. I was contesting the idea that because they called you a girl they actually saw you "as a girl" & you were being bullied "as a girl."

Please try to consider for a moment how different it was for you to be called a girl when being bullied by boys than it is for girls to be bullied by boys for actually being girls. You could take solace in the fact that you were not, in fact, a girl. But such solace was & is not available to any girls. Even though you were picked on by other boys, you as a much-maligned male still ranked, & today rank, higher in the social hierarchy & in the eyes of the males who bullied you than any girl.

Use male socialization as a card all you want but please stop accusing me of fictional mental illnesses to attempt to tear me down. It’s deeply ableist. I have several mental illnesses narcissism and solipsism aren’t among them. Stop.

I am not "accusing (you) of fictional mental illnesses to attempt to tear (you) down." Narcissism is a personality trait, not necessarily a mental illness. Solipsism is a POV which says that the self is the only frame of reference. Sorry, maybe I've missed some of your posts, but on this thread & others, I've never seen you cite any sources for your views other than your own narrow personal experience.

For example, on another thread not long ago, I responded to your repeated assertion that all trans-identified males have "shitty lives" & are doomed to never being loved & to being constantly mistreated & marginalized by society by naming a bunch of happy, successful, highly acclaimed trans-identified males whose own apparently fulfilled & privileged lives stand in sharp contrast to what you insist must be true for all trans-identified males because that's how you say it is for you. You wrote off all the examples I cited by tersely retorting "You have no concept of life for the average trans women", then continued in the thread simply repeating your self-pitying claims & accusing other posters of insulting you. Further down the thread you said, again citing no evidence, that anyone trans who appears to be happy & loved is just pretending because "no one can be happy or normal being an out trans person. It’s a shit life."

https://saidit.net/s/GCdebatesQT/comments/837q/both_in_light_of_recent_events_in_what_context_is/u2va

As to your claim that it's "deeply ableist" of me to point out how exceedingly self-referential your posts make you appear: I have a hunch that nearly everyone on this sub has direct experience with mental illness of one kind or another, as I certainly do. And some of us have physical disabilities as well. So trying to shut me or other posters up by throwing out accusations of "deeply ableist" won't work.

The fact that you seem to think you alone have the right to call others "ableist" only underscores my point that you come across as unable to see beyond your own self. I have known a lot of people with a variety of mental illnesses, & most of them/us even when most ill are still capable of grasping the fact that other people have constructed their self-images in different ways & that their/our individual experience does not necessarily represent all human experience. Narcissism & solipsism might accompany some mental illnesses, but they are not synonyms for nor necessarily hallmarks of mental illness. I apologize if I gave a different impression.

In your previous post instead of directly engaging with & attempting to refute my points, you insinuated that I can't possibly have any idea what I am speaking of because I must not have any experience of ever being around a male child in school of any sort. Specifically, you condescendingly said

Have you ever been around a male child in school of any sort?

Which was clearly an attempt to make it appear that my points can't be "valid" coz I have no "lived experience" of male children in school contexts. I find it telling that you consider it perfectly OK for you to say such a condescending & "invalidating" thing to me - & to say all the other insulting things you've said here about women generally that are meant to reduce us to sexist stereotypes & "deny our existence" as separate to you & the cartoonish ideas you have about all the billions of us in your head - but when I say something to you that you find galling, you take it as your right to go straight to the bigoteering & to command me: "Stop."

It’s a cause of one kind of bullying not the root cause of all bullying. That being said it’s pretty wild to assert that bullying by boys of girls and other boys is somehow the result of sex.

I never said that sex is "the root cause of all bullying." We haven't been talking about all kinds of bullying here. The only kinds of school bullying we've been discussing in this convo about "gender norms" vs. sex as a motive for bullying are a) male bullying of males whom the bullies suspect might be homosexual or bi, and b) male bullying of females. Let's not bring other kinds of school bullying into it.

I did indeed say that boys' bullying of girls is the result of sex. Not "somehow the result of sex," but the result of sex directly. If you can show that this is not the case, please provide some evidence.

But I did not say that boys' bullying of other boys is "the result of sex." I said specifically that boys' bullying "of boys perceived to be homosexual, or to have homosexual leanings," is the result of sex.

My view is that the animus that some people have towards those they perceive as or suspect to be homosexual is based on their revulsion towards the idea of persons of the same sex engaging in explicit sex acts with one another, & squeamishness about certain sex acts in particular especially when done male-on-male. One reason I believe this is because many boys & men who are bi or gay, & many girls & women who are lesbian or bi, still have been subjected to extreme homophobia even when the males are in no way "effeminate" & the females are in no way "masculine." After all, the majority of gay men & MSM are not "effeminate" - they're ordinary men in presentation like Glenn Greenwald or Anderson Cooper, or they're ultra masculine. Yet such guys still often get shamed, derided, treated like pariahs & are discriminated against once homophobes find out they are gay or MSM.

Also, the fact is that growing up, pretty much all boys get slurred as "gay," "fxggot" & the like no matter what their "gender expression" or sexual orientation is or will turn out to be. Males who bully employ homophobic slurs against everyone they bully, & will do so for any reason under the sun. I know many guys who were bog standard guys in "presentation," mannerisms & behaviors growing up, yet in school they were frequently called "gay" & "fxggot" & worse by mean boys of their age & older for such arbitrary reasons as liking a particular kind of pop drink, wearing socks that exposed their ankles, playing musical instruments other than the drums, being into chess, wearing sweatpants or other drawstring trousers, rollerblading rather than skateboarding, & because their families drove energy efficient small cars, hybrids or electric vehicles rather than gas-guzzling behemoths like Ford Expeditions, Hummers or trucks.

Unfortunately, for some school boys & certain grown men who bully others, "fxggot" is an all-purpose slur that they use indiscriminately against everyone for no apparent reason other than their own internal animus & lack of originality. Some bullies even use the "fxggot" slur against girls.