Sorry I’ve been so slow to respond. Thank you for explaining!

What I mean is, TW wouldn’t be able to legally change their documents to state that they are women or female. I know that won’t stop some TW from calling themselves those words, but they wouldn’t be able to do it on legal documents and the rights of women would remain female specific (in this scenario “women” and “female” would be the new words, couldn’t think of any made up word lol).

All the words I thought of sounded silly lol. The legal sex change thing is such a sticky issue. I wish we could just go to a system where it wasn’t visible except in special circumstances where it was needed or something. It makes perfect sense to me why GC doesn’t want it to be possible. I can’t condemn it without being a horrible hypocrite though because I did it and it helped me (even though the barriers were more serious then, bottom surgery, etc.).

I disagree. I think it’s uncomfortable for TW to do because they don’t want to, but I don’t get why in theory it would be that difficult to clarify that you’re trans. I understand there are reasons for not wanting to, but I don’t think the idea of clarifying in and of itself is that difficult, when necessary.

I don’t think it’s uncomfortable just because of not wanting to do it (even though you are right that a lot of us don’t want to). It can also be emotionally difficult. Speaking for myself, it can bring up uncomfortable feelings because things were difficult for me as a child. It’s also hard if you aren’t naturally assertive because there isn’t a natural time to bring it up and people don’t expect it. It can be intimating for that reason too. It’s still something we have to do though.

But I when it comes to certain things- like a female specific job/opportunity, sports, dating, stuff like that- transparency should exist. That doesn’t mean every time someone approaches you you have to inform them that you’re trans, it means when it matters, you should be honest imo.

I agree with you for the most part of when it’s important to share. We might disagree about friends, but I think we agree everywhere else. You said in a previous conversation you would feel like your boundaries were violated if you were friends with someone you saw as a woman and later found out they were trans.

I just mean that to me, trans people are the ones who need to be aware of potential boundaries and navigate them.

I agree. I’m just hoping that there is a way we can do that a still be able to live good lives. Sometimes, I worry that we can make an effort, but we may overlook something and won’t be doing it well enough if we are someone who passes. I guess I feel like the subtext from GC sometimes is that it would be better if passing trans people weren’t a thing.

Or the bathroom/sex based spaces thing- gc gets attacked for wanting female spaces to remain female spaces- but the whole point of female spaces is to be specifically for females in the first place so it’s really not wrong for females to object to that being taken away, that’s a boundary that got crossed and we shouldn’t be vilified for objecting.

I’m sorry GC is vilified for standing up for females rights and spaces. I don’t want to do that and want to support you as best I can. I feel like as more people become aware of things that are happening there may be more questioning of the way “trans rights” are treated right now. At my company, for instance, women tend to be the most supportive of trans inclusion and having our company do things like stating our pronouns. I feel like they don’t recognize the potential harm for women of just accepting all this though.