"my friend claims to be bi but has only dated men/women"

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[–]PenseePansy 8 insightful - 1 fun8 insightful - 0 fun9 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

THANK YOU. Yeah, I'm pretty fed up with having this "we gay people require proof of your SSA credentials!" crap directed at us, too. As though it's up to them whether or not we qualify as bi. Oh yes, HOMOSEXUALS must be the experts on THAT. Dafuq?

I think what this comes down to is their unwillingness to accept us on our own terms; they demand that we conceal the side of ourselves which they don't share-- that we act like their Mini-Mes. So they're not really recognizing us as bisexual at all. In effect, by "editing out" our opposite-sex-attracted side, they're recasting us as homosexuals. And if our dating history is opposite-sex-only... we're not cooperating.

Bi erasure yet again! Gay people need to start dealing with us as who we really are-- in full, not just the part that's convenient. Until they accept the way in which we're DIFFERENT from them, rather than the same, they're not getting us at all. And it's high time that they did.

[–][deleted] 8 insightful - 1 fun8 insightful - 0 fun9 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

I think what this comes down to is their unwillingness to accept us on our own terms; they demand that we conceal the side of ourselves which they don't share-- that we act like their Mini-Mes. So they're not really recognizing us as bisexual at all. In effect, by "editing out" our opposite-sex-attracted side, they're recasting us as homosexuals. And if our dating history is opposite-sex-only... we're not cooperating.

That's a really good point I hadn't thought about. And they only do it when it's convenient for them. That thread on droptheT about that bisexual man who was claiming to be gay because he'd only ever been in love with one woman? They tore him apart over there, INSISTING he was bisexual. And I agreed. It doesn't matter the degree to which you are attracted to men and women, as long as you ARE attracted to men and women.

But flip that around and it's a bisexual who's mostly dated their hetero sex? NOPE. PROBLEM. STRAIGHT UNTIL PROVEN OTHERWISE. Makes no fucking sense.