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finance
Apple stock loses 7%, Apple freezes stock trading for 20 minutes under guise of "upcoming news"
submitted 5 years ago by magnora7 from cnbc.com
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[–]Tom_Bombadil 4 insightful - 4 fun4 insightful - 3 fun5 insightful - 3 fun5 insightful - 4 fun - 5 years ago (2 children)
Down 7%, huh... That doesn't sound too bad...
That's only... $64.9 BILLION DOLLARS!!!
[–]Mnemonic 1 insightful - 2 fun1 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 2 fun - 5 years ago* (1 child)
M: Hey
T: Hey, how are you?
M: A bit down...
T: Awww, how much?
M: Just 7%
T: That's $64.9 BILLION DOLLARS!
M: LOL, yeah it sounds like a lot, could probably feed a continent with it. Ah well.... Look at it from the brightside! next year we will have asshole recognition! So your phone has a 50/50 change of detecting it has fallen into the toilet!
T: Why 50/50? It has front- and back-facing cameras!
M: Because if it identifies an asshole, it could be seeing a user's face.
[–]Tom_Bombadil 1 insightful - 2 fun1 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 2 fun - 5 years ago (0 children)
That's hilarious!
In addition, Facebook messenger is listening and thinking, "Hey... I know those assholes! One of them thinks he just lost 64.9 BILLION DOLLARS! The joke's on him, cause my AI buddy did that."
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[–]Tom_Bombadil 4 insightful - 4 fun4 insightful - 3 fun5 insightful - 3 fun5 insightful - 4 fun - (2 children)
[–]Mnemonic 1 insightful - 2 fun1 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 2 fun - (1 child)
[–]Tom_Bombadil 1 insightful - 2 fun1 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 2 fun - (0 children)