What are you looking for in a woman/relationship?

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[–][deleted] 13 insightful - 3 fun13 insightful - 2 fun14 insightful - 3 fun -  (4 children)

Banter. Similar sense of humour. Some similar interests, or won’t make fun of my life of Dorkdom.

Someone who can see the positives and the negatives of things without getting too stuck in either.

Someone who finds a lot of things fascinating and interesting, or is at least willing to listen to my crazy ideas, and find me amusing instead of bothersome. Basically, being curious about life is important to me. I still find things magical in the way kids do. I can see something cool and be amazed. I would do best with an adult who hasn’t lost that sense of themselves.

A good planner, like good at filling out forms and organizing life tasks etc.

A good cook, or willing to learn how to cook together and make disastrously inedible meals with me.

Someone who is good at seeing what actually matters because I can get pretty overwhelmed by details and stop seeing the big picture (I am much better at this now, I don’t mean I need someone to do all the work).

Someone affectionate and sexually adventurous that doesn’t mind being bossed around in bed. Lol.

Someone who likes being in nature and is healthy, but not body-obsessed to the point of distraction.

I tend to pair well with more chill, quiet women who don’t make friends as easily as I do, but also don’t get worked up into a froth as much as I do when I see injustice and stuff. Lol. I usually offset their lack of social skills and they offset my tendency to become “extra” when I am riled up. Lolol

[–][deleted]  (1 child)

[deleted]

    [–][deleted] 4 insightful - 3 fun4 insightful - 2 fun5 insightful - 3 fun -  (0 children)

    I still get super excited when I see a bridge lift for boats to pass underneath. I’m like “omg cooooooooooooool” like a 4 year old. Totally blows my suave lesbo cover. And yes, going out drinking is a colossal snooze, I was sick of that at like 24.

    [–]yousaythosethings 3 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 0 fun4 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

    This is similar to my list. Sounds like you are like me but even more dominant and more social (although quarantine may make an extrovert out of me at this rate). I am all about the joie de vivre, being an ideas person, coming up with big plans and schemes, researching the details of all possibilities and options, but then handing off my plans to be actually executed. I would be a shitty secretary/admin/personal assistant type person.

    [–][deleted] 3 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 0 fun4 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

    Assigning me as a personal assistant would be like assigning a mad professor as your assistant. Plus I would try and “top from the bottom.” I am more of a king’s advisor type, because I want to think strategy and not do the other admin stuff, like talking to vassals. Lol.

    I am not an extrovert like “seeking” social interaction, I am just very extroverted when I am forced into a social situation. I joke around a lot and laugh and have fun at work, even in pretty brutal conditions. I get very tired of interacting over a long period, but more from sensory overload than hating to interact. It’s hard to explain. I need a lot of quiet time.

    You’re right about the dominant thing, but it’s not intentional (until it is). I think it’s just a personality thing. People think I am much taller than I am, and that’s probably the reason. Lol. I’m pretty irreverent, tbh, a real “chaotic good” type (I was telling another babe on here who is into d&d that just the other day).

    Your list does sound a lot like mine. I love ideas. Thinking is the best. I like thinking more than I like actually executing my plans. This where it’s important to have a “friend of action” or a “gf of action” to enact the plans. I really admire people who just “start” things. Like, just go for it. I’m not spontaneous unless it’s to do with sex or flirting or whatever.

    [–]SailorMoon2020 11 insightful - 2 fun11 insightful - 1 fun12 insightful - 2 fun -  (1 child)

    Lol, I thought you were gonna go into detail,op.

    Anywho, I'd prefer a woman who believes, who has faith regardless if who their entity is. A woman who is active and tries to live a fit, healthy lifestyle. Upon working from home, I've been able to do more work out and exercisng. I even have a v-cut, a goal of mine that I had since working from home. I'm attempting to be able to do the splits. Also notice, stamina and endurance has increased greatly. Now can last much longer when playing tennis or swimming. So being active can really provide numerous benefits both physically and even mentally.

    Someone who also speaks another language. I'm able to speak Spanish and Danish. Currently learning German. Someone who is more feminine than I. I'm not a butch/stud by any means but just average woman. Woman who wear high heels or, make up, hair and nails done, the stereotype of what it means to be feminine.

    Regards to a relationship besides the above, I seek monogamy, and a partner who can be a bit adventurous regarding sex. Someone who is independent and has their own hobbies, that preferably aren't the same as mine except reading and exercising. I think space is important and helps prevents co-dependency.

    [–]a_crow 8 insightful - 3 fun8 insightful - 2 fun9 insightful - 3 fun -  (0 children)

    Stability, mental health, goal oriented, chapstick. Anyone from Houston here fit that description, holler at me lol

    [–][deleted] 8 insightful - 1 fun8 insightful - 0 fun9 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

    I mostly just want someone who I feel lucky to have and who feels lucky to have me and I've yet to find that balance. I either wind up dating scrubs (and I know it) or women who are way better than me and I'm the scrub (and they know it).

    Everything is negotiable beyond that, but I guess if I made a list of traits, they'd likely be someone whose physically active but not a freak about it, isn't obsessed with gender ideology, progressive but with a brain of their own, not super high maintenance, and respects that I need alone time. In the venn diagram of us, we'd have a decent overlap in tastes, beliefs, and hobbies without being exactly the same - I need someone with a life of their own as well.

    [–]VioletRemi 7 insightful - 1 fun7 insightful - 0 fun8 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

    I was always looking at more calm and feminine women, I really like to watch at women in beautiful dresses, I often want to my active "top" personality to meet someone with calm personality, so we can complement each other...but I am always ending in relationship with freedom-liking, tomboyish and strong personalities, and we are always fighting who is leading who, and I really loving it every time. And this is a bit of a problem, I really love and enjoy long hair, I am passionatelly want to take care of my gf hair (it is pretty much very strong fetish), but women I am ending in relationship, are almost always have short hair because of their personalities! Not always, thought, one butch I was in relationship had surprisingly long hair (to waist and beyond). She was almost perfect woman!

    [–][deleted] 6 insightful - 3 fun6 insightful - 2 fun7 insightful - 3 fun -  (2 children)

    ideally, someone sweet & kind & funny & romantic & super affectionate to be mutually codependent with forever and ever. <3 who is also attracted to me. <3 and preferably likes to go out and do stuff & look at things. i love looking at things - trees, oceans, museums, one-legged pigeons, and i'd really appreciate having a second opinion on such matters. an emotionally mature, self-aware woman who can communicate openly with honesty & really wants a partner for life. <3 realistically right now i would just like someone who will meet up with me on the weekends and hold me for like, an hour or seven. or like ten minutes. an awkward side-hug maybe. or do a high five i don't know. any sort of human contact would be dope. but probably too dangerous at the moment. maybe someday. <3

    [–][deleted]  (1 child)

    [deleted]

      [–][deleted] 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

      aha fantastic, stupid smiles are what i live for!! yes yes!! it's so unhealthy, we were not made to be glued to screens! & doin stuff the old-fashioned way can be good exercise for ur body & brain! if social media is evidence of anything it's that everyone really needs to go outside and take a deep breath & try to see some birds every once in a while lmao

      [–]plumedoomer 6 insightful - 3 fun6 insightful - 2 fun7 insightful - 3 fun -  (0 children)

      You know those really pretty girls that are kind of bitches? Like that. But, like... a calm bitch.

      Muscular, slightly taller than me (like 2" more). Femme, but in a pant suit kinda way, not a girly girl way. Dominant, a little judgmental, subtle. Well spoken. She should love cuddles. She should like taking charge so I can fall back. A few years older than me. Intelligent and open to my ideas.

      Completely monogamous, willing to set and pursue goals with me, good conversationalist, reliable, likes cats, makes money, ideally cooks. Is not overly emotional, anxious, or easily hurt. Blunt. Has a method of pursuit that is neither boring nor annoying OR isn't difficult or painful for me to pursue. Will give enough time for me to develop interest and comfort. Is not extroverted; is ok with long periods of alone time with me and doesn't yearn to be a socialite. Likes being at home.

      [–]oofreesouloo 5 insightful - 3 fun5 insightful - 2 fun6 insightful - 3 fun -  (6 children)

      I don't even know if I actually want a relationship lmao.

      [–][deleted] 5 insightful - 2 fun5 insightful - 1 fun6 insightful - 2 fun -  (5 children)

      None of those assholes you have already dated, that’s for sure.

      [–]oofreesouloo 3 insightful - 2 fun3 insightful - 1 fun4 insightful - 2 fun -  (4 children)

      Awww thanks for the support, babe

      [–][deleted] 1 insightful - 2 fun1 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 2 fun -  (3 children)

      Anytime, babe 😉

      [–]oofreesouloo 3 insightful - 3 fun3 insightful - 2 fun4 insightful - 3 fun -  (2 children)

      Hot af. My vajay-jay just reacted. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~!!~!~~~~

      [–][deleted] 1 insightful - 2 fun1 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 2 fun -  (1 child)

      Loooool

      [–]oofreesouloo 1 insightful - 3 fun1 insightful - 2 fun2 insightful - 3 fun -  (0 children)

      🙈🙈🙈

      [–]plotbunny 5 insightful - 1 fun5 insightful - 0 fun6 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

      Someone extroverted who is open to trying new things, but doesn't take herself too seriously.

      Likes to keep active. Has some direction in life. Less feminine than me. High sex drive and a good sense of humour would be cool.

      [–][deleted] 4 insightful - 1 fun4 insightful - 0 fun5 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

      I want to date someone who is emotionally stable and financially responsible. Prefer an atheist, maybe a deist, hard no to anyone in organized religion. If she has to make sure that everyone everywhere knows we're lesbians, that's too much for me. I'd prefer certain people just not know.

      [–]yayblueberries 4 insightful - 1 fun4 insightful - 0 fun5 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

      Somebody I can get through tough days with who will help find the humor in them.

      Somebody naturally curious and doesn't just shoot down doing things without even considering them.

      A fellow lifelong learner.

      A woman not preoccupied with being negatively judgmental. Sort of hard to describe, but I've come across a LOT of women who seem preoccupied with talking smack about the pettiest of things or people who are hardly even around. It's just pointless and bad mojo and I don't like it.

      [–]yousaythosethings 3 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 0 fun4 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

      Absolute musts:

      • Someone who will feel like my equal but who inherently inspires me to be my best by being who they naturally are

      • Super passionate about something

      • Innately curious

      • Adventure-seeking or happy to be along for the ride on the adventures and schemes I think up

      • Worldly and curious about the world, loves to travel

      • Different from me in ways that are complementary

      • Someone who expands my own perspective on the world. I love seeing the world through other people's eyes.

      • Probably at least a little more sociable than me

      • Either doesn't care that I'm not into cooking or is willing to cook with me

      • Complementary to me in terms of physical activity. I don't love being in the gym, so they have to be OK with that or have to help me learn to like the gym by doing things with me there. I like being outside, being in nature, going to parks, walking through the city, walking everywhere I can, etc. I like to be active by being out and about, hiking, and trying out different activities. I do like yoga/meditation, but I prefer the meditative aspects of yoga.

      • Mix of masculine and feminine. I like to be smacked in the face by both qualities. I think feminine-appearing women with dominant personalities are especially hot. I'm not attracted to timidness (but sensitive is good!). I do not mind a power struggle.

      • At least a moderate sex drive and at least reasonably sexually adventurous

      • Someone who likes being touched (by me!)

      • Good executor, meaning good at getting things done

      • Someone who will call me out on my shit

      • Someone who is into experiences more than being into things/objects

      Bonuses:

      • I speak a few foreign languages so it would be fun to have one in common, but really any foreign language knowledge is super attractive.

      • I tend to have a thing for artistic women. Not the kind who are overtly hipster or hippie or over-the-top in their appearance and would look utterly out of place attending a work event with me. But just women who enjoy making art in whatever medium and have their own artistic vision. I love seeing the world through their eyes. I love people who bring beauty into my life. Also some women have wanted to draw or paint me, and have done so. And that shit's hot - the fact that they want to, I mean.

      [–]midnight305 2 insightful - 2 fun2 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

      No dick , but other than that no clue.

      Someone adventurous mostly cuz I dont like just sitting at home all day every day letting my life pass me by I want to see the world and explore.

      Someone who can tolerate my sarcastic ass.lol