Sex & IntimacyNo one's fully gay or straight, folks!!!!

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[–]PenseePansyBio-Sex or Bust 4 insightful - 1 fun4 insightful - 0 fun5 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

It's not that I don't think homosexuals were "born this way"; I do. That is the nature of sexual orientation. It's innate.

This is equally true for bisexuals. (And heterosexuals, for that matter.) So in fact bi people often use the "born this way" argument ourselves; it's not uniquely gay. And, I think, the potential problems with it-- the dangerous doors that this line of argument can open-- aren't uniquely-bi, either.

Here is what I mean:

The argument most homosexuals use is "yes I was born this, so no I can't help, yes people have attempted to help it and yes they failed miserably in the end".

OK, so: what if there's some scientific discovery which changes all of this? That allows editing of adults' DNA, say, so homosexuals can, in fact, be made heterosexual? Exactly as though they had been born THAT way. Now what? If the argument defending one's right to be gay hinges on "people have attempted to help it and... failed miserably in the end", and that ceases to be true... how are you going to justify not "helping it" now? According to "born this way", the reason was that you couldn't... but now, of course, you can.

Maybe you don't have a problem with this, but I do. On behalf of homosexuals as much as bisexuals. I don't want either of us to be edited out. Whether it's by means of transgenderism, genetic manipulation, or anything else. Consequently, I'm very intent on nipping any suggestion that our sexual orientations are something to be "helped" in the bud.

I'm not saying that that the "born this way" argument shouldn't continue to be made at all. I'm saying that it shouldn't continue to be made (imo) with the "can't help it" implication left intact. Here's what I mean: gay person to straight person-- "I was born this way... just like you were born straight. And I should no more have to 'help it' than you should. Because there is nothing wrong with either."

Of course, I can't tell you-- much less gay people as a whole-- what to do, in this respect or any other. Not that I'd presume to anyway.

I would just remind you that your actions may have unforeseen consequences, and not only for gay people. As well as noting that, while the "can't help it" implication of "born this way" may pose a more immediate threat to bisexuals than homosexuals, there's always the possibility that we could just be the canary in the coal mine.

[–]MarkJeffersonTight defenses and we draw the line 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Great points. I've have long held to the 'born this way' belief(due to my own experiences growing up) and line of persuasion, but as you have vividly illustrated, there are potential risks in using it in arguments against belligerents without fully considering the implications of it. For years, I have been peripherally cognizant of the ensuing existential threat that could result from the overutilization of this talking point if some future development emerged that would render it's potency for persuasion null and void, and by extension render us as same-sex attracted people null and void.

Even beyond nipping it in the bud, we must decapitate and cauterize the neck of this hypothetical Hydra by nuking it from orbit long before it sprouts heads that can take over global societal ethics and government policies. And that begins with not simply making the argument for/against compulsory heterosexuality down to whether one can help it, but also down to whether it is the right thing to do. At least then we'll stand a fighting chance against forces who'll seek to destroy us as long as we have enough friendlies on our side. But if we paint ourselves into a corner by basing all our arguments on whether our sexuality can be modified or whether we are capable of choosing our partners, we'll be at the mercy of anything new that comes along which can potentially unseat that rationale. And this overriding concern of ours is not simply #JustBiThings.