My annoyance is the gay community at large saying one thing and then doing another. So saying "trans men are men " and "I'd be open to dating a trans man" and of course they never do.

The problem is we don't know how much of it is hypocritical, inauthentic virtue signalling, where they tell themselves it's true but never actually expect it will happen to them and don't give it any real though, and how much of it is virtue signalling for fear of being otherwise ostracized from their social group knowing full well they'd never sleep with a heterosexual woman even if you paid them. I don't like the idea of lying and contributing to the public perception that gay men really have the hots for heterosexual women with identity issues, but it is what it is; the peer pressure is really strong, and it's undeniable TRAs have a lot of clout currently in mainstream LGBT. Though more pushback is exactly what we need to stop it...