I Signed Up to Study Sexual Health. What I Got Was Gender Ideology, Fetishism, and Porn

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[–]Shadow_Lurker 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (6 children)

Uh... yes they do.

I never saw anyone call Einstein or Newton 'damaged' in any way, but again, this might be just me...

The social and sensory issues of autism (and related disorders) can be debilitating to live with, depending on severity. They're also not all geniuses. I think it's naive and disrespectful to treat autism like a "superpower" when I've heard countless autistic people wish they were normal & didn't have to deal with it. Source: Grew up in some kind of special ed school, knew a lot of autistic kids. And surprise, I am no "super genius" either. I'm just dumb.

That's why I took pains to differentiate high funcioning autists from low funcioning autists, as they aren't the same. Most people when speaking about the subject tend to only talk about the second and not the first, interestingly enough.

I have no reason to believe homosexuality is genetic

This is not a matter of subjectivity.

I'm far from an optimist I'd rather believe that this is damage I have a chance to recover from, than something that was "destined" for me since before I was born. I simply cannot believe it is "as nature intended" or a gift from a higher power.

This cope won't help you with anything.

Want some advice? Maybe the problem is not with homossexuality itself, but with you. If you don't give more value to the life you have right now, then you will still suffer, homossexual or not.

This is the same thought process most 'eggs' have: "if I was the opposite sex my life would be so much easier, I would be so much popular and so on, so on.

[–]OPPRESSED_REPTILIANIntersex male | GNC | Don't call me "a gay", "twink" or "queen" 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (5 children)

Because it's all a matter of perspective. Historical figures are glamorized and often we never know the truth about them.

Yeah but then you get to a point where, if they truly have no negative symptoms, are they really autistic or just smart?

This is not a matter of subjectivity.

Yes it is. It's literally unproven

Want some advice? Maybe the problem is not with homossexuality itself, but with you. If you don't give more value to the life you have right now, then you will still suffer, homossexual or not.

No, the problem is homosexuality. I'd like myself just fine if I was able to have a normal sexual/romantic relationship and not have to hate myself because I'm turned on by the people who hate me and want to harm me/ being in an abusive/rapey relationship. I DID like myself just fine back when I was/believed I was straight. Even though I was treated like shit by others and told I was inherently bad, I still was happy until homosexuality kicked in.

This is the same thought process most 'eggs' have: "if I was the opposite sex my life would be so much easier, I would be so much popular and so on, so on.

Irrelevant and not comparable. Sex cannot be changed and is very physical. Orientation isn't. I was born male, no, I was male before I was even born, yet I did not become homosexual until many years after I was born.

It's more like saying "If I wasn't depressed my life would be easier" or "If I didn't have neurological issues that made me emotionally volatile, people would like me more." Both of which aren't untrue, anyway.

I don't think my line of thinking is the problem. Why wouldn't I be unhappy with the fact that I'm not attracted to people who would treat me decently/as an equal (women) and that I exclusively have an involuntary, unwanted, extremely stressful sexual attraction to dangerous sex acts with the people who don't even see me as human? The answer is not just to "love myself for being broken and accept that I'm destined to be some guy's sex object." That's not living. And unless you're also going to give me a lecture about how great being depressed is and how I need to stop trying to recover, and just embrace being a shut in and never cleaning the house, then I think you need to question your point there.

[–]Shadow_Lurker 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (2 children)

Yes it is. It's literally unproven

No it's not. "Unproven" is not the same as "proven negative".

There is a difference.

No, the problem is homosexuality. I'd like myself just fine if I was able to have a normal sexual/romantic relationship and not have to hate myself because I'm turned on by the people who hate me and want to harm me/ being in an abusive/rapey relationship.

No, it's you and specifically your low self-steem.

You as an independent human being have the capability of saying no to any sexual enconter. If you feel a sexual partner doesn't respect you as a person, even if you are attracted to them, there's still the option of not letting them fuck you.

Spoiler: if you don't impose some self-respect people, men and woman alike, won't respect you. I wish this wasn't the case, but we live in a world with a lot of shitty people.

Irrelevant and not comparable. Sex cannot be changed and is very physical. Orientation isn't.

If sexual orientation can be changed then why aren't you straight yet?

I was male before I was even born, yet I did not become homosexual until many years after I was born.

That's how sexuality works in general: gay, straight or bissexual.

Why wouldn't I be unhappy with the fact that I'm not attracted to people who would treat me decently/as an equal (women

You already presume much.

If you were straight you would learn that they also haven't it easy when the subject is dating. You would also probably be the type of person that complains about how women only want you because fo money, status or some shit. Nothing would change.

Women can be as cruel as men, you just don't seem to know it yet.

The answer is not just to "love myself for being broken and accept that I'm destined to be some guy's sex object."

I never said it was.

It might be cruel what I'm going to tell you, but it's necessary: you are only a "sexual object" because you allow this to be the case. As I said before, you have the capability to say no, to refuse to be turned into an sex object.

You are using homossexuality as an excuse for your own lack of willpower and low standards.

Like I said before: the problem is you

[–]OPPRESSED_REPTILIANIntersex male | GNC | Don't call me "a gay", "twink" or "queen" 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

Omfg this is insane.

"Being gay is genetic!!!"

"No it's not. That's never been proven."

"W-well that's not the same as being DISPROVEN!"

So... are you saying that, despite there's no evidence supporting it (and quite a lot of evidence against it), that we're supposed to believe it's true until definitively proven otherwise?

If that's so, why am I not allowed to believe that homosexuality is a disorder? That's never been disproven either.

No, it's you and specifically your low self-steem.

It has nothing to do with self esteem, other than that homosexuality contributed to low self esteem when I previously didn't have it.

You as an independent human being have the capability of saying no to any sexual enconter. If you feel a sexual partner doesn't respect you as a person, even if you are attracted to them, there's still the option of not letting them fuck you.

Yes and? That doesn't stop them from trying. That doesn't stop the influx of guys asking me to participate in degrading sexual acts, or the mere fact that there is no male interested in me who will NOT ask me do these things so I cannot have any healthy relationship.

If sexual orientation can be changed then why aren't you straight yet?

Mental illness can be recovered from, but I have not rid of my depression yet.

Just because sexuality can change doesn't mean it's a choice, just as how depression can be recovered from does not mean it's as simple as "choosing to be happy." If I what I believe is true; that homosexuality in me was caused by neurological issues and/or trauma, it could take YEARS to fix. If it's trauma based, that stuff is hard to get over, especially without help. And considering no one currently offers help for sexuality it means change is very difficult.

But I have no reason to believe it's impossible for me to get better. If I was "definitively, intentionally gay" and it could never be changed, why do I have straight urges inside (even if I am not aroused by them) and like the idea of being able to have a female partner?

That's how sexuality works in general: gay, straight or bissexual.

So which is it, "sexuality can never be changed" or "Nobody is born that way and we gain it later in life due to experiences"

Because those statements contradict each other.

If you were straight you would learn that they also haven't it easy when the subject is dating. You would also probably be the type of person that complains about how women only want you because fo money, status or some shit. Nothing would change.

Lol... no I wouldn't.

Firstly there is a big difference between being upset that the only people who are into you want to abuse and degrade you, and being pissed that people just want you for money. I'd rather be robbed than be sexually mistreated, they're not comparbale.

Secondly I have no money and status, and I don't think I ever will, so why would I ever complain about that? Plus the women who have been interested in me in the past seemed nice and normal. I have never had that experience with a man.

you are only a "sexual object" because you allow this to be the case.

Oh so victim blaming. It's my fault for men approaching me with "Hey bitch boy let me rape you" and no shred of love, because...? What? How can I fix anything? I can't simply magically choose to attract the mythical "good guys." I don't believe they exist but even if they did, I cannot use mind control. I cant magically make the abusive guys disinterested in my sexually and make the "good ones" like me.

Guess what, idiot. I say no ALL THE TIME. I don't consent to sex with abusive men. Unfortunately I have still had sex with guys Im not attracted to but I have NEVER consented to an abuser or a guy who treats me that bad. But that doesn't stop them from showing interest, and like I said, THERE HAVE BEEN ZERO GUYS INTERESTED IN ME WHO WERE DECENT. That is BEYOND my control.

[–]Shadow_Lurker 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

"Being gay is genetic!!!"

"No it's not. That's never been proven."

"W-well that's not the same as being DISPROVEN!"

This is a strawman, as I never said such thing.

So... are you saying that, despite there's no evidence supporting it (and quite a lot of evidence against it), that we're supposed to believe it's true until definitively proven otherwise?

Indeterminate means indeterminate, not true or false.

If that's so, why am I not allowed to believe that homosexuality is a disorder? That's never been disproven either.

Yes it has, by a long time.

Disorder, by the medical definition of the word, is what have the potential of causing suffering to the patient. Homossexuality has been removed from the DSM because it, by itself, doesn't bring suffering to the homossexual.

The exception to this is egodistionic homosexuality, which is a totally different can of worms.

Now, you are allowed to believe in anything you want, but don't try to pass your beliefs as fact.

It has nothing to do with self esteem, other than that homosexuality contributed to low self esteem when I previously didn't have it.

Yes it has, as your words prove.

Just because sexuality can change doesn't mean it's a choice, just as how depression can be recovered from does not mean it's as simple as "choosing to be happy." If I what I believe is true; that homosexuality in me was caused by neurological issues and/or trauma, it could take YEARS to fix. If it's trauma based, that stuff is hard to get over, especially without help. And considering no one currently offers help for sexuality it means change is very difficult.

Cope, cope harder.

If what you said previouly is true, and you are indeed russian then you have acces to 'help for sexuality', as gay conversion therapy is not banned there. Why don't you try it if you are so desperate?

If I was "definitively, intentionally gay" and it could never be changed, why do I have straight urges inside (even if I am not aroused by them) and like the idea of being able to have a female partner?

Go for it them, nobody is stopping you. Hell, some people would be very happy for you!

So which is it, "sexuality can never be changed" or "Nobody is born that way and we gain it later in life due to experiences"

Because those statements contradict each other.

The men is really made of straw, isn't? What I meant by that is that no one gets out of the womb already horny for anyone. Sexuality generaly manifests itself after puberty.

Using the "I haven't been born feeling attracted to men" as a gotcha moment for the assertion that homossexuality can't be inborn is stupid, so stupid in fact that not even religious quacks use it as an argument!

Lol... no I wouldn't.

Yes, you would. I know your types very well.

Firstly there is a big difference between being upset that the only people who are into you want to abuse and degrade you, and being pissed that people just want you for money. I'd rather be robbed than be sexually mistreated, they're not comparbale.

This is subjective, as there's men that have no problem with sexually foward woman but can't cope with being used as status ladder. You only experienced the first and not the second, so you say this from a place of inexperience.

And being used for your status is not the same as being robbed lol

Unfortunately I have still had sex with guys Im not attracted to but I have NEVER consented to an abuser or a guy who treats me that bad. But that doesn't stop them from showing interest, and like I said, THERE HAVE BEEN ZERO GUYS INTERESTED IN ME WHO WERE DECENT. That is BEYOND my control.

So this is a case of "I'm so opressed, people that I want to sleep with aren't interested in me! Help, I'm opressed!"

This is worse then I thought! You are no different from the TRAs, not a bit. Guess what? This makes your "victim blaming" acusation even more disgusting, as you are comparing yourself to actual rape victmins.

How assuring...so this is a case of sexual entitlement and not low self-steem. All of my sympathy for you has been lost, all of it.

You aren't entitled to sex with people you find attractive, not of a second. If that's your problem just learn to wait for a person you yould find attractive to be interested in you, or just cope with your singleness.

That's what a good portion of humanity already does, so your not special.