Please help me. Identity crisis due to trauma and drug use.

Pamela_Isley · 2020-08-23T16:30:40+00:00

Elaborate?

Pamela_Isley · 2020-08-23T16:28:55+00:00

The trauma is fucking me up more than the drug use. I don't leave my house except to get drugs, I've become so withdrawn and isolated and I have panic attacks and nightmares of being raped and humiliated at least once a week. I kept a job and I had my own place while using, until the rape, then I lost my emotional stability and couldnt keep up with work. My sexual identity was always a core aspect of who I was and questioning myself is a large piece of why I'm so traumatized. I know I need help, therapy and rehab, but those things arent free and Im unemployed living with my parents. Meth is dirt cheap and my savings wouldnt get me a week in rehab but will get me a couple months more of drugs. I dont have a lot of options and honestly I just wanted a little compassion. I'm really going through it and I have no one and nowhere to turn.

Pamela_Isley · 2020-08-23T16:14:46+00:00

I can't get therapy, I'm on Medicaid and the therapists who take it in my area arent taking more clients. I called a rehab center and they said they dont take Medicaid specifically for meth. My luck is phenomenal.

Pamela_Isley · 2020-08-23T16:12:25+00:00

Thank you. I think I just wanted a little compassion more than anything and you gave that to me. When I'm sober I'm only attracted to women, and very feminine women at that. That hasn't changed. I appreciate your comment a lot.

Pamela_Isley