The one day I decide to drink and everyone else seems more blotto than me. I keep drinking but it's not working. Booze seems like such a waste of money.

I actually am probably more drunk than you. I polished off a nearly empty bottle of rum, a pint of vodka, drank a jug of homemade wine, had 12 high abv craft beers and more is incoming. Also smoked a j and took close to a half oz of kratom. Oh and ephedrine. It helps me sleep, paradoxically.

This is gonna make House Party look like House Party 2.