There's too many easy targets here, but the absolute Two Grand Canyons' worth of distance between the sexy illustration at the top and the author's actual appearance is getting the biggest laugh for me.

Saying they "crossed the threshold into femininity" because they put a soft glow filter over the biggest fucking 5-o-clock-shadow coated masculine man-jaw ever is #2

#3 is the sub-header: "I’ve come to see my body’s value as more than transactional". This is literally a story only about how you're a disgusting hooker, and about how transactions between your body and the creeps who pay you for sex have gotten easier since growing man tits. Not only do you see your body's value as only transactional, you seem hell bent on destroying any part of it that might not be.