Seattle Disbands Police, Replaces With New Organization 'People Offering Little Insulation From Community Evils,' Or P.O.L.I.C.E. For Short

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"This is an exciting new chapter in the history of humanity," Seattle Mayor Jenny Durkan said as she unveiled the organization's new name. "We have finally freed ourselves from the oppressive police. In their place, we will have P.O.L.I.C.E."