DiscussionThat feeling when a TRA you don't trust tries to befriend you out of the blue

submitted by wafflegaffWoman. SuperBi. from (self.LGBDropTheT)

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[–]RedEyedWarriorGay | Male | 🇮🇪 Irish 🇮🇪 | Antineoliberal | Cocks are Compulsory 15 insightful - 2 fun15 insightful - 1 fun16 insightful - 2 fun -  (3 children)

I don’t have any advice for you in relation to your predicament. Except to ignore this fella. That’s all I’ve got. Of course, I’m assuming you don’t have any mutual friends and you don’t go to the places he goes to. Hopefully he loses interest quickly, but it is alarming that he has contacted you after months of no contact, because clearly he wants something from you.

[–]wafflegaffWoman. SuperBi.[S] 17 insightful - 2 fun17 insightful - 1 fun18 insightful - 2 fun -  (2 children)

Yeah I'm not thrilled. The risk of a random encounter is close to zero though we know some of the same people, but yeah, this is a little weird from someone I hardly ever interacted with in that social circle as it was. Sucks to look sideways at someone but this one has put their attitudes on display publicly and we all know what these particular attitudes portend. I can think of a few MTF folks I would be happy to chat or hang out with (and have in recent years), but this is not one of them. Not because they are necessarily a terrible person in other ways (I wouldn't know), but because the odds of getting roped into a boundary-requiring situation which results in some sort of public lying about me being a transphobe are just too high. Responding to this is just asking for trouble.

I'm definitely a creep-phobe and this one has always struck me as a bit of a creep.

[–]RedEyedWarriorGay | Male | 🇮🇪 Irish 🇮🇪 | Antineoliberal | Cocks are Compulsory 15 insightful - 2 fun15 insightful - 1 fun16 insightful - 2 fun -  (1 child)

Don’t respond to him. If you rarely interact with him, there’s no need to reply. Anyone who believes his side without listening to yours can be dropped and replaced by new friends and acquaintances.

[–]wafflegaffWoman. SuperBi.[S] 11 insightful - 2 fun11 insightful - 1 fun12 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

Indeed, and I don't even have a "side" yet since we haven't interacted personally, just via group activities. This is the first direct personal contact.