You're 19 your boyfriend left you. And your parents kicked you out. Do you know how many people live in their cars now and love it? You're a girl you'll find another guy pretty easily. And you'll have employment. I see wins all around. Don't kill yourself by the way. never let them win. You need to feel, feel how cruel the world can be. The pain will subside and then you can feel how beautiful the world will be as well. Don't dilute your mind with drugs.