LifestyleIs having racial preferences racist?

submitted by ukrdude10 from (self.LGBDropTheT)

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[–][deleted] 6 insightful - 2 fun6 insightful - 1 fun7 insightful - 2 fun -  (3 children)

No. People get so bent out of shape about racial preferences because we live in a racist society, but preferring the features and/or skin color of certain races over others at its most basic level is no different than height, weight, lifestyle, and hair color preferences. It's not racist to me if someone says 'I think black people are ugly' and I'm black. I think men with beards are ugly. I think overweight men are ugly. But no one calls me a bigot for saying that, and they shouldn't. They might call me shallow or an asshole but I've never been accused of committing a hate crime due to my aversion to facial hair and dad bods. No one should be called a racist for racial dating preferences either. The problem is race is such a touchy subject people get so triggered when someone expresses a racial bias. A racial dating preference CAN be racist, but it isn't at it's core. To be clear:

A: 'I think black people are subhuman, that my race is better, and that's why I don't date them' - racist

B: 'African features are unattractive to me because I think black people are subhuman' - racist (and where a lot of people get confused)

C: 'I think black people are ugly because African features are unattractive to me' - not racist (and what many don't consider an option. This is how most non-racist people who have this specific preference think)

People say C but it gets interpreted as A and/or B.

[–]SailorMoon2020 7 insightful - 2 fun7 insightful - 1 fun8 insightful - 2 fun -  (2 children)

C: 'I think black people are ugly because African features are unattractive to me' - not racist (and what many don't consider an option. This is how most non-racist people who have this specific preference think)

This is racist because it's implying all Africans have the same features. This is incorrect. Africa, known as the birth place of humans, has the most diverse genetic make up on this planet.

Scientist have found features from various different tribes that contribute to the theory of evolution as well the theory of migration. Some African tribes have what is known as European features, others as Asian features, etc.

Another reason this comment is just as racist because it implies any person mixed with black will have "African features". Again, we're not all a monolith and again, due to being mixed our genes are even more diverse. Because black people especially in North and South America are mixed with so many groups, there is no black person who is third our fourth generation that has "African features".

[–][deleted] 8 insightful - 2 fun8 insightful - 1 fun9 insightful - 2 fun -  (1 child)

Maybe I should've specified 'features people typically associate with Africans' like dark skin, wide noses, thick lips, etc. I'm well aware black people are not a monolith and that we don't all look the same. I'm well aware some have European features and can even pass as other races. But you're splitting hairs right now. When someone hears the term 'black people' in a colloquial sense most aren't thinking about the vast genetic diversity in Africa and South America. I'm talking about casual conversation where the mental image the term 'black people' invokes is one of dark skin, coily hair, etc. My point still stands. If someone is not attracted to that mental image, that does not make them racist by default. They must hold other prejudices about black people beyond not being attracted to us in order for them to be racist.

It's much easier to say 'I don't find black people attractive' when you know there is a general set of features black people have in common that you aren't attracted to rather than list them all just to avoid looking racist. People are lazy, and most of the time it's really not that deep. I'd much rather say 'I don't date people with kids' because that's easier than listing all possible caveats in which I might date someone with offspring.

[–]SailorMoon2020 4 insightful - 2 fun4 insightful - 1 fun5 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

features people typically associate with Africans' like dark skin, wide noses, thick lips, etc

I mean you're not wrong.