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[–][deleted] 4 insightful - 1 fun4 insightful - 0 fun5 insightful - 1 fun -  (3 children)

We just have different opinions on what a lesbian is, it’s fine. My opinion and your opinion don’t actually keep anyone from coming out. I’ve just been around a long time and known hundreds of lesbians, my generation sounds like it’s pretty different than yours. Whatever. There is a pretty standard trajectory for most lesbians (Apart from asexual lesbians) who come out, in my own experience of the community over time, there will be some outliers, but not as many as say they are lesbians while not actually being lesbians. It honestly seems like there are a lot more women who are truly not lesbians that are calling themselves such, and most are on tumblr.

Whether or not we disagree on the topic won’t change the amount of legit lesbians in the world. If someone is so unsure of themselves that they let some women gatekeeping decide their orientation they wouldn’t make it as a dyke anyway. It’s a moot point.

Also you’re the one who brought up your sister. I didn’t hate on her, I’m not touching on that whole thing.

I see you share things and then get upset with people when they don’t respond exactly the way you want. This has happened over and over on this sub in conversations where you discuss experiences that are unrelatable, and honestly pretty gross, to many lesbians and receive pushback. If people keep pushing back then maybe you should reflect on why. You’re not going to convince me that women who enjoy fucking men are lesbians. Or find it “okay” or any of that. I don’t think it’s close-minded to think that women who spend many years willingly having lots of sex with men (who are not in some extremely oppressive situation) are lesbians. It’s possible, but very very unlikely. If they like women they are more likely to be bi, in my opinion. The way you are qualifying lesbian there would be no actual definition for it

[–]Skipdip 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (2 children)

I was saying that jokingly about my sister but I guess it didn’t come across.

I’m not saying that women who enjoy fucking men are lesbians. But I’m saying there are lesbians who have trauma who do fuck men and that doesn’t necessarily determine their sexual orientation.

Late bloomer lesbians really seem to exist, I am not the expert on this topic, but it makes sense to me. There is such thing as some fluidity within the categories. So maybe that is a definition difference. I use my sister as an example because she is straight but has some fluidity. Not enough to make her bi... and you agree with this. So why is it so hard to believe that this could exist on the lesbian side as well. I kind of do wish you would get into this because as I see it is does matter.

I feel like you really don’t understand what this generation of lesbians is going through and it would be nice if you had more empathy for us. I don’t think it’s fair to say that this is happening in all of my posts. This has happened with this one, and then with the one where I shared my story. And a lot of the people who had knee jerk reactions to that one came around when I clarified certain things. It has been a real struggle for me to come to terms with my sexuality given my trauma and then this QT shit on top of it. As an elder in the lesbian community (and I’m using that term loosely) it would be nice if you could be a bit more understanding. Really the only person I have conflict with on here is you.

[–][deleted] 3 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 0 fun4 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

I understand you completely I just completely disagree. Let it go. People are allowed to feel you are wrong. Fluid is bisexual. Get over it. God.

[–]Skipdip 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Fine think what you want