"Male rape"

submitted by FlippyKing from (self.GenderCriticalGuys)

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[–]FlippyKing[S] 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

I think in any of these blow-ups over movies books or tv shows the nuance of the story telling and the purpose these events serve in the story telling is always lost and often on purpose. I didn't see it or read it, but if the lesson she is supposed to learn is to just ignore everyone's wishes then that seems short sighted-- I sort of doubt that's actually the writer's idea. He should learn that his lie has consequences, but he might not be the character on a journey.

I always try to consider law and legal ramifications separate from general discussions in that I don't think a legal standard should be the same as an every-day understanding of things, and I think that because I an doubtful of a government's ability to prosecute issues in a fair manner. I don't think we can or should expect government to solve such matters very often without either abusing their power or just worse convicting everyone they want regardless of the circumstance. I realize rape is the worst example of a crime to hold that kind of view on, but my view is based on my opinion of government and prosecutors and judges and not on the nature of the crime. I agree there should be some legal standard dealing with forced sex regardless of the sex of the individuals and if the umbrella term for it is rape then that might work or it might be painting with too broad of a brush-- I can't say which, and it is only my rather 'anarcho-opinion' about it.

I wonder if this has a tinge of chauvinism to it, but the reality of the risk of pregnancy and just the violation of a woman when a man rapes her makes it a serious crime that guys (including me) have not done enough to deal with among ourselves culturally or socially. It's far worsee than what the tv show depicted, and I blame the fictional dude for lying first and foremost. But we would have to change our culture, because calling out when we hear a dude being blatantly misogynistic is clearly not enough even if it happened enough. Along the lines of my previous reasoning, there's a line between correcting and policing. But I think beneath that, the problem is the way women have been viewed as a commodity or viewed as less than a commodity. I think that rape culture might be at the intersection of a lot of dysfunctional aspects of our culture where a lot of bad behaviors and bad ideas converge on some guys where that's the result.

[–]MezozoicGay 6 insightful - 1 fun6 insightful - 0 fun7 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

To be honest, shown in TV show I can't even call a rape, as it has very different consequences. Book version sounds like sexual abuse/offense, while TV show one is almost completely showing that man is on the wrong side there - and for some reason internet is defending that man and calling woman as rapist.

First of all, sex was with consent up to very last moment, and even last moment he not tried to do anything as it would show his lies and that he goes all the way to support it.

Second part, when man and woman have sex and woman asking "do not finish inside", but men finishes - it is much worse than if man saying "I would like to not finish inside", but woman insist on doing this. In the end it will be woman who will get pregnant, for man nothing will be changed.

And in current situation it is clash of who you support more - grown up man, who not wanted kids in this marriage, so he lied to young naive girl about fact of being sterile, knowing that she has no idea how babies are made, or support young woman who always wanted kids and was very upset that her husband is sterile, but married him nontheless. And even if they will get kids - she would be the one taking care of them, as during those times in most cases women weren't working and men weren't taking care of kids.

That sex not ended in pregnancy, but even if he did, the dilemma is "one not wanted kids and lied, other wanted kids and tried to make them" - who overpowers who, one who don't want or other who want, and why?

I think that rape culture might be at the intersection of a lot of dysfunctional aspects of our culture where a lot of bad behaviors and bad ideas converge on some guys where that's the result.

Agree here.

It is especially visible in asian cultures, especially Japan, with their huge problem of groping, and how they are treating women and rape there in general. Or in China few decades ago, where women were binding their feet to receive injuries to legs for the whole of their life, because it was believed that feet binding is making vagina more tight and that it will bring more pleasure for their future husbands. Women were forced to do this, and who refused was called bad girl and bad wife, who will die alone.

And visible in fact that clitoris researches only started not that long ago, science was trying to avoid recognizing fact that women can have pleasure during sex as well, and that women have libido at all. Nietzsche was focusing all sexuality and libido through men as well.

So there a lot of different factors, misinformation, misbeliefs and traditions which are factoring in it. In current days there is internet culture that is only multiplying all those factors.