This is it. We're officially done, Marvel Studios. We, the fans, are breaking up with you. I know we said we would after The Eternals, but then you sprung Spider-Man: No Way Home onto us (even though we all know that was Sony's doing) and you said you'd promise you'd change. But then you gave us shit like Thor 4 (no, we're not calling it "Love and Thunder" anymore than we're gonna call Twitter "X"), Wandavision Season 2 Featuring Doctor Strange and America Chavez, and the real reason we should've walked away in Wakanda Forever. We was tight with Chadwick, so we didn't leave then, but seriously: FUCK Wakanda Forever!
In 2023, you gave us that turd that was Ant Man 3, and you tried to push that fucking insufferable Jonathan Majors onto us. You convinced us to "give you one, one, ONE more shot" after Guardians of the Galaxy 3. But then... The Marvels happened. The Eternals was one giant FUCK YOU, and Wakanda Forever was another giant FUCK YOU, yet, you did it THRICE with The Marvels. I'm not even going to get into how you made us almost split after She Hulk: Attorney At Law and that was ONLY forgiven cause no one watched that shit and you said "It was Jessica Gao's fault" and all those shitty Rick and Morty "Pickle Rick" writers and how you had nothing to do with that and would sweep She Hulk under the rug and de-canonize it from the MCU like Disney did to Star Wars. But The Marvels? Eat a fucking bag of dicks, Feige! No more excuses. No more bullshit. That is IT!
You know, YOU were the one who named it "Endgame," after all. Spider-Man ended with No Way Home, as far as we're concerned. We know you're gonna fuck up The X-Men and try to make Professor X and Magneto black and say "It's cause they're based on MLK and Malcolm X" even though that isn't even true and just started as a 90s internet rumor. We know you'll treat the Fantastic Four as a joke cause the 2000s and 2010s movies did. We all know you're going to make Daredevil a simp and beta male and erase The Punisher from canon and call him "a symbol of the alt-right and police brutality and CIS white male toxicity and white supremacy" and a bunch of shit. We know Deadpool 3 is gonna be shit cause Deadpool 2 was fucking shit and had race-swaps done like with Domino (way to show your albino representation there, Hollywood) and it's been fucking six years since the last movie and that wasn't even made by Disney. What hope do we have of YOU getting it right, Marvel?
You have nothing left to give us, Marvel Studios. We're not going to watch you fuck up the X-Men in 2025 when the FOX contracts expire. We're not going to watch you fuck up Spider-Man AGAIN and bring back Zendaya to be gender-swapped Miles Morales or some shit. Insomniac Games fucked up Spider-Man beyond all recognition already. We're not going to watch you make a girl-boss Sue Storm, make ANOTHER black Johnny Blaze, or turn The Thing into a trans allegory or some shit, while shitting on Mr. Fantastic as a "straight white male." That's it. We're done. Fuck you, Kevin. Fuck you, Marvel Studios. Fuck you, Kathleen Kennedy (cause we know you gave Kevin all his ideas.) And fuck YOU most of all, Bob Iger.
The MCU is now officially dead. This is truly your end game. Good bye, Marvel. We're gonna go support the Nintendo Cinematic Universe now and help it defeat the Barbie feminist movie shit and Netflix ruining more anime.
-Signed, the collective MCU audience
