Looking at communities that are centered towards abuse from people with BPD, covert NPD, and C-PTSD helped me understand my ex's bullshit more.

submitted by gloomy_bear from (self.BPD)

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[–]gloomy_bear[S] 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (5 children)

Thank you so much! She does absolutely check the boxes of BPD and C-PTSD, and I have gone no contact with her; I blocked her number and everything, but I just made the mistake of checking her twitter through nitter as my sockpuppet accounts I haven't been on them in ages. I am subscribed to bpdlovedones, C-PTSD partners and C-PTSD relationships as well and have gotten a lot of resonation with the posters on there. She most likely has more of the quiet type.

[–]gloomy_bear[S] 2 insightful - 2 fun2 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 2 fun -  (4 children)

I also have traits of a cluster a personality disorder (paranoid personality disorder) so it takes me a long time to get over stuff.

[–]SMCABBPD chicks get fucked, do what you're good at. 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (3 children)

The quiet types are the worst. They are covert. They have the whole world snowed that they are some delicate little flower and they just have bad luck and they just can't find anyone and make them happy.

If they are throwing coffee cups at you, it makes it a pretty easy decision to leave.

When they know how to complete the push/pull cycle with little damage, all it does is increase the trauma bond you have with this person. That's why they are the worst. The manipulation is real.

Getting over it is hard enough, I'm 4 years out of a 13 year ordeal with a master manipulative BPD bitch. And I still have a hard time finding my point of indifference to this day.

[–]gloomy_bear[S] 2 insightful - 2 fun2 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 2 fun -  (2 children)

I've noticed they also have the empty stares as well to try to get a reaction out of you. My ex would do this and it made me uncomfortable.

Fuck the 403 error

I dated for 6 months and it's been almost 7 months since she broke up with me. She told me that she broke up with her online gf b/c she was scared about the future or some shit.

[–]SMCABBPD chicks get fucked, do what you're good at. 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

Don't get hung up on all the fancy letters. Don't get hung up on trying to understand it all. Understand it to the point where ypu need to to have an understanding of what the red flags are, and never throw them away again.

I'm like you, I dove so hard into what BPD was, talked about it all the time, wanted to understand it all. But it doesn't help. It helps to a degree, but then it just consumes you, slowing down your progress.

A good therapist(there aren't very many by the way) wouldn't even let you speak about the BPD or the other person in your situation. They would make you talk about you, getting you down the road to healing and indifference much much faster than dwelling on a person and her actions. And why do that anyway, you weren't a person to her, you were a shiny toy to play with, why give her the satisfaction of existence?

[–]gloomy_bear[S] 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Yeah my therapist is trying to help me more on focusing what I need to do to move on more. Like I've been talking about getting a job (I have an appointment with a job coach next week to look at job listings), hopefully going into special Olympics as an athlete next year, going to a club for autistic people, going to parks and recs activities for special needs people in the fall, I've been reading more books, watching TV, going on walks, doing skin and hair care, hopefully getting a car so I can learn basic car mechanic work (I have books for that I plan on reading), going to sew some things again etc. I also plan on going to speech therapy and maybe occupational therapy for autism as well.