In my experience, the more egalitarian a group is, the more the whole thing isn't just some race to populate a party with single females and everyone is valued

Good point, but feminists often don't seem very egalitarian.

None of these things disprove or discount feminism, and thinking so is incredibly simpleminded.

I'd say feminism isn't a coherent ideology anymore, so I'd rather argue against specific points rather than an abstract word that everyone defines differently. (Before you ask, by “feminists” in the previous paragraph I meant people who identify as feminists, no matter what they think it means.)

assuming all of these men were conventionally attractive

Occam's razor.

you redpill-influenced people

I'm rather blackpilled.

Some of these men were my good friends, and the weddings were universally applauded by their friends and family. It's still a huge mindfuck thinking about the fact these people struck their partners.

This still seems fishy to me. Almost all of your male friends were pretending to be good for several years, without giving away anything about their actually evil nature until it was too late? That doesn't sound like something that could just happen. I feel like there's something more going on that I can't determine because I don't personally know them or you.

use your brain and think in terms of generalities and systems

If you see generalizations as a good thing, I don't even know what to say.