I thought I saw everything

onenaivecanary · 2022-01-29T21:38:38+00:00

I'm pretty sure that dressing as women for skits and team entertainment is pretty common in pretty much all groups of bored men living in a long-term sex segregated environment (boarding schools, the armed services, etc).

onenaivecanary · 2021-12-14T16:30:43+00:00

They did it to Ellen, of all people. I'm not surprised they did it to Pete, too. These same people claim learning about "LGBTQ+ history" is essential to education, but think the only "facts" anyone needs to know is that ALL historic gay figures were AKSHUALLY trans.

onenaivecanary · 2021-12-06T14:22:58+00:00

So... I would like to be able to downvote this just because it grossed me out and I found it insulting, but I guess you get a lightbulb because at least here I can find other people who find this kind of thing grossly appropriative and fetishistic.

onenaivecanary · 2021-12-06T14:21:17+00:00

The funny thing is, both sides think you're not a woman if you're a lesbian. At least the cultural conservatives are honest that this is an insult. The woke homophobia is.... another insane level.

onenaivecanary · 2021-12-06T14:19:35+00:00

Accurate.

onenaivecanary · 2021-12-03T13:57:20+00:00

Yeah, this keeps confusing me a lot. I grew up in a fairly conservative/moderate space, and as a young, not out to myself lesbian it was really easy to just be a "virtuous" young woman who didn't mess around with dating. I understand that at some point in your 20s, your family will probably start talking about you settling down and whatever, but you can always tell them that you don't want to and never will - end of story in most first world countries. I really don't understand this extreme focus on telling a bunch of strangers how you feel about having sex in great detail (that none of them will care about, at all). I believe there are people out there who don't feel attraction toward other people (for a variety of reasons, some of them not so good). I still think the reasonable thing to do is just... continuing to not have sex you don't want.

onenaivecanary · 2021-12-02T03:41:29+00:00

It's straight women imagining two men supporting each other, cuddling, and having Edward-Cullen levels of devotion to each other and THEN having sex with each other. So much of that shit is about establishing total emotional devotion before sex. It is very obviously written for straight women.

onenaivecanary · 2021-11-30T22:37:08+00:00

The comments in that thread are based.

onenaivecanary · 2021-11-28T22:51:31+00:00

You would think. It's mostly been old conservative white guys who get mad at her while she's on her way to the bathroom. She and I both have vocal fry sometimes, but also we are squarely in the normal female range. I think people are just, you know, lumping "gay/gnc" in with trans. Which to be fair is what the activists and major organizations are doing, too. But it makes me feel like we're on a trajectory back to the dark ages.

onenaivecanary · 2021-11-28T15:59:44+00:00

My wife has absolutely been harassed for going to the women's room, and she's pretty visibly a woman (at least, from my perspective - she just has a short hair cut). There are absolutely right-wingers in the US who are lumping GNC women in with trans women and who are being absolute assholes about it. I'm glad this experience ended in a civil way for this other woman, but it really doesn't always. Clowns to the left, jokers to the right. And more and more of them on both sides are getting increasingly vicious.

onenaivecanary · 2021-11-28T00:02:19+00:00

What the hell kind of book is this from?

onenaivecanary · 2021-11-27T23:56:26+00:00

There is certainly a radical detachment from material reality that is necessary to process all the different gender "identities".

onenaivecanary · 2021-11-19T15:32:10+00:00

Ok. You're a young person going to an interview in an ill-fitting suit. That's your 'sexuality.'

onenaivecanary · 2021-11-17T17:00:46+00:00

Someone needs to tell these guys what a harem is. That's actually what they all want. Join the fundamentalist mormons, fulfill your sexual dreams!

onenaivecanary · 2021-11-17T02:02:52+00:00

Because you know, every lesbian desperately dreams of having sex with someone who begrudges every minute of it. So sexy.

onenaivecanary · 2021-11-17T01:59:55+00:00

64% voted for gay marriage, 35% against, so it passed. But the Swiss government gets to figure out exactly when it will take effect.

onenaivecanary · 2021-11-17T01:52:35+00:00

Right!!! like, wtf!

onenaivecanary · 2021-11-17T01:51:45+00:00

That sounds pretty bonkers to me, but I believe you. I think it's possible that the person in question could be a closeted lesbian, but also, butch-leaning straight women definitely exist. And even if this woman was closeted, I really don't understand at all how she could be "hurting the company" by not talking about her sexual orientation at work. It's ok to be honest, but also if you don't want to share, then you really really shouldn't have to. This sounds like the world's stupidest sexual harassment lawsuit brewing.

onenaivecanary · 2021-11-16T15:53:54+00:00

Curious what kind of taboos you've seen in liberal social circles regarding gay people who come out "late." My wife and I both came out late by today's standards (mid-twenties); I think she was viewed with more skepticism than I because she had been (very unhappily) married to a man before divorcing him and meeting me, but her story fits a very common lesbian narrative - grew up in conservative location, marries young af, comes out about a decade later. I feel like we are viewed with some suspicion by local queers, but I thought that was just because we are plain old lesbians and not some flavor of "trans," not because we came out in our 20s instead of as thirteen year olds... Honestly, I'm pretty sure the "out" thirteen year olds are just following a social trend and have no better an idea of their sexual orientation than I did at that age, so at least the disdain and skepticism goes both ways.

onenaivecanary · 2021-11-16T15:14:41+00:00

Right. Also, a LOT of us tried to live as heterosexuals until we couldn't anymore. Whether you went on some opposite-sex dates as a teen or were married for a decade. Knowing that you were actually trying to fight nature the whole time makes it all make sense (as opposed to trying to convince yourself that the next sex position or bottle of lube might just be the magical solution that makes you normal). The TRA "unlearn your preferences" line horrifies me, not because I can't imagine living through radical changes in self-image or lifestyle (I've gone through at least two or three in the last decade. It's not fun, but you live through it) but because I know from experience that this IS NOT POSSIBLE.

onenaivecanary · 2021-11-16T15:01:12+00:00

There are way more nonbinary people than trans people these days. It's the "escape" route for lesbians and bi women who stay in the LGBTQ++ spaces who don't want to be labeled TERFS, as well as an easy way for straight women who want to show that they aren't like other girls to suddenly be "queer." The latter group bulks up the numbers a lot.

onenaivecanary · 2021-11-16T14:55:19+00:00

I think terming sexual orientation a "feeling" is rounding it down a lot. Your romantic interests shape the way you present yourself to the world and the way you are received in it, and this social awareness presents really young, even though you usually don't know what the cause of it is. Also, there is over a century of research establishing homosexuality as a sexual orientation. We don't know the exact biological cause, but it is pretty clear at this point (to everyone except the gender crowd and extreme religious people) that homosexuality is innate and unchangeable. We have our earliest accounts of adults in consensual homosexual relationships from ancient Greece (especially men - I'm not referencing pederasty here; there's at least one playwright who was viewed as being really odd and made fun of for choosing to live with another adult man). Our earliest account of someone seeking SRS comes from Magnus Hirschfeld in the 1910s. There's just way less data, way less research, way more RISK, and the most current research (Lisa Littman) makes it abundantly clear that social factors are at work in the current trans craze.

onenaivecanary · 2021-11-16T14:40:51+00:00

All of the comments are from people who identify as bi, pan or trans in some fashion. Also, why is it that so many asexuals feel like their opinion is needed in that thread? I find this ironic as hell. It's fine to not want to have sex with people. Why do you have to chime in and shame other people not wanting to have sex??????

onenaivecanary · 2021-11-09T15:16:38+00:00

How does being demisexual differ from normal human sexual behavior? It took like 200 years of psychological and then sex research to recognize homosexuality in the way we do today. I'm pretty sure we can't even define demisexual (or asexual, for that matter) in a meaningful enough way to make it the subject of any serious study on human behavior.

onenaivecanary · 2021-11-08T20:30:01+00:00

When I looked at this the top comment was some creep asking to slide into OPs DMs. This is a prime subreddit for grooming and these "guys" seem oblivious.

onenaivecanary · 2021-11-06T17:36:21+00:00

I mean, the traditional bigots think we are all the same thing. Essentially what the TQ+ has become (boundary-breaking, whiny, never satisfied slippery slope) is what traditional bigots accused gay activists of doing from the beginning. In some ways we helped create this monster.

onenaivecanary · 2021-11-06T17:32:13+00:00

It amazes me how so many people who can get themselves to believe that they are the opposite gender and gay rather than (the statistically MUCH MORE likely and reasonable AGAB and straight) without ever taking any part in a gay or lesbian community or even watching the things actual gays and lesbians watch. If your only bridge to same-sex attraction is anime, you are not gay. If you are more comfortable seeing cartoon gay relationships than the more realistic portrayals that exist (and I will admit, these ARE hard to find), then you are not gay.

onenaivecanary · 2021-11-06T17:26:15+00:00

I really really don't get why ace people talk about being ace so much. I came out pretty late (mid 20s) and had never dated anyone until after I started coming out. I didn't need a word to describe myself while I wasn't dating, I just told people no. Any oppression I felt was due to internalized homophobia. I think it's fine to have a word to describe not being interested in sex, but I don't see the need to describe this as a stigmatized marginalized sexual identity.

onenaivecanary · 2021-11-05T15:42:13+00:00

Poe literally says that she did not want to talk about actual dating, just "inclusion" in her niche industry. It makes sense why her story wasn't included. And the sexual assault accusations against Cade are accusations that could be leveled against literally anyone who was responsible for filming porn "I felt pressured to do it to advance my career" is a thing literally every porn actor can say about almost every shoot they have done. That is not legal sexual assault. If it was, Lilly Cade would be behind bars.

onenaivecanary · 2021-11-05T00:46:04+00:00

FOR REAL. I will believe you're a woman and a lesbian if you can also see that this was made for men. The fact that so many prominent TW activists can't is really insane to me.

onenaivecanary · 2021-11-04T03:41:34+00:00

I think the trans rights stuff is a major issue for reporters of the social justice bent, and has been for some time. More recently, other people have started paying a little more attention because this used to affect a very tiny subset of people and now it looks like our version of the thalidomide disaster or the recovered memory craze/satanic panic. The facts weren't really ever in favor of the current state of things, but people believed the lies because they didn't take the time to look past the initial propaganda of the early 2010s.

onenaivecanary · 2021-11-04T03:35:24+00:00

Lilly Cade. She's been outspoken about not wanting to have sex with trans women (as a lesbian porn star) since the 2010s. She was quoted in the BBC article and had a long rant on her blog about this topic recently. So basically the people in these tweets are saying "Lilly Cade did this other completely disgusting sex act, but she STILL says she doesn't want girldick! How disgusting can she be." So, super rapey. Along the lines of "how dare gay men want to have anal sex over having vaginal sex." It doesn't have to be your thing (and also, Lilly Cade was doing this shit for money), but if you can't understand why someone else doesn't like the sex you like, maybe just shut up about it.

onenaivecanary · 2021-11-04T03:28:20+00:00

Are these two people even attracted to each other? I know that different women might prefer different types of sex, and I see how the various genders add a layer of difficulty to any and all communication, but seriously, if you can't figure out anything (besides oral????) to do, then it really sounds like you don't want to be in the sexual situation you're in. ESPECIALLY if you find yourself turning to reddit for sex advice.

onenaivecanary · 2021-11-04T03:24:50+00:00

That looks like a plastic drain cover. There are a ton of vibrators out there in various shapes. This shape looks like it is purposefully useless.

onenaivecanary · 2021-11-03T14:07:15+00:00

I mean, if the story was about biological lesbians doing the same things, no one would be objecting in this way. I agree that the worrying thing here seems to be that lesbians (and bi women - they have some similar experiences) need to keep their mouths shut and endure this for the validation and cultural acceptance of trans women. It's disturbing.

onenaivecanary · 2021-11-02T21:16:51+00:00

Most people I'm around don't make me specifically feel weird about being gay, and I'm lucky to be married, but I feel like there are a lot of INSANE LGBT+ (mostly really QT+) types in my small left-leaning city and they consistently communicate that if you aren't an anarchist freak, you're not gay. They make me worry for my future. I feel like I am more likely to be attacked by this group than your traditional homophobic bigot, and It would really give me comfort to find some normal LGB people because with straight allies I feel like 50% of the time in liberal places they are also supporting the radical QT+ over the LGB.

onenaivecanary · 2021-11-02T14:19:04+00:00

For me the main thing is that LGB people have different issues and priorities than trans people (regardless of how expansive or limited you want to view "trans" as a category). I care about continuing to live in a world that recognizes homosexuality and bisexuality as well-researched sexual orientations. My needs with respect to being a lesbian have very little to do with the medical establishment or changing the way other people view me on a daily basis. My main concerns are about access to employment, housing, and marriage for people who are gay and bisexual. I am not concerned with "mainstreaming queerness," which I see as a luxury issue that has very little pragmatic purpose beyond being a power trip for those involved in "queerness." I'm all for individual expression, I just think that if you are doing it to bait "normies" or generally disturb people, you should understand that you are basically bullying them.

onenaivecanary · 2021-11-01T20:44:15+00:00

Honestly, I'm impressed that the most upvoted comments are affirming the OP lesbian. It would be better without all the handmaidens, but at least she's getting some support.

onenaivecanary · 2021-11-01T20:12:37+00:00

For me, the main purpose of trying to find a gay community was to know that I was, in fact, not a wierdo. That other women felt the way I did. I would like to see a resurgence of sane gay spaces for that purpose. I'm not sure how they will happen because right now I avoid anything that advertises itself as LGBT (because it's always heavy on the TQ+), but it would be nice.

onenaivecanary