How do you know that I don't identify as a woman? by Sittingonarainbow in GenderCritical
[–]ladyreason 9 insightful - 1 fun9 insightful - 0 fun10 insightful - 0 fun10 insightful - 1 fun - 2 years ago (0 children)
The replies.... I'm not sure how I feel.
I think mostly because most of the comments I honestly can't tell who's being snarky and who's being serious. It's wild.
So apparently, using sites like WomenAreHuman and This Never Happens to show how the Trans ideology is harming Women is "Cherry-picking" by Kai_Decadence in GenderCritical
[–]ladyreason 17 insightful - 1 fun17 insightful - 0 fun18 insightful - 0 fun18 insightful - 1 fun - 2 years ago* (0 children)
Perhaps point out that each one of these "cherries" are female human beings, sometimes even children, being directly harmed by the ideology he's espousing.
Then ask him if he realizes how misogynist it sounds to refer to hurting human women as pieces of fruit, and ask how many "cherries" it's going to take before he starts caring about them as people. One bushel of female humans? Two?
Why are there so many trans women in tech? by Astrid2448 in GenderCritical
[–]ladyreason 4 insightful - 1 fun4 insightful - 0 fun5 insightful - 0 fun5 insightful - 1 fun - 2 years ago (0 children)
These specific men? Not so much, a lot of the time.
I mean, I get what you're saying and you're right, like I said we shouldn't buy into their delusions. But I think we should leave an opening for a little kindness and understanding to the hurting and confused ones that could come to their senses and become allies if they understood what they were really doing to themselves, and to women.
Especially the ones who are basically brainwashed and railroaded children, and the classic transexuals who didn't initially pull this nonsense.
Much like we understand trans men despite their apparent surface desire to abandon us altogether.
[–]ladyreason 7 insightful - 1 fun7 insightful - 0 fun8 insightful - 0 fun8 insightful - 1 fun - 2 years ago* (0 children)
Just as women aren't a monolith, men aren't either. shrugs
And I believe people can learn.
Yes, there are awful autogynephilic males that just need to go away. But I honestly think there are some males who are confused and hurt and have neurological issues and they need a little kindness and a fair bit of logical discussion of what being a woman really is and why they can't just decide to co-opt that.
If "gender" ("femininity" and "masculinity") is biological because of sexual dimorphism, then why are we fighting against "gender" when things like having muscles are biologically "masculine" and things like being short are biologically "feminine"? by Nohope in GenderCritical
[–]ladyreason 9 insightful - 1 fun9 insightful - 0 fun10 insightful - 0 fun10 insightful - 1 fun - 2 years ago* (0 children)
Ok so imagine society has two buckets.
One bucket is labeled "men" and the other "women".
So into one bucket they put pregnancy and uterus and such because obvious, and into the other they put testicles and so forth, and everything is fine because yeah biology empirically exists right? Cool.
Except then men are like "we're more strong so we're going to put strength and tallness in our bucket and you can have emotional stuff in yours" and women are all "ok some of us are pretty tall and there are emotional men too but I guess maybe..."
But the men, who aren't actually listening at this point, are all "and we want to be the hunters and have jobs and run everything, and we'll toss the mopping and the laundry and watching kids in the women bucket..." and the women are all "wait a sec..." and then the men toss high heels in their bucket but after a while realize they suck so they pull them out and put them in the women's bucket, and they swap the pastel pink and blue between the buckets a few times arbitrarily, and women are all "hey this isn't fair we didn't agree to not be allowed to be doctors or scientists and some of us would be great at it and not all of us like romance novels..." but the men really really aren't listening at this point.
And after a while everything in the entire world has been sorted into these buckets based mostly on what the men in power want to have in the men's bucket.
After a long time, some really angry women get fed up and manage to pry a few items like "voting" and "wearing pants" out of the men's bucket. And they start pointing out that the only thing that BELONGS in the buckets are the basic physiological differences that are immutable. Everything else should be available regardless of what sex you are. And the men, who are used to having all the best stuff in their bucket, get mad that women would want stuff in THEIR bucket because it's been THEIRS like seriously forever so men obviously just automatically should ALWAYS HAVE things like higher salaries and actual testing for potential medical treatments and not being expected to cook dinner.
The problem isn't sex differences based in physiology.
The problem is that the patriarchy decided that things that have nothing to do with biological sex, needed to be parceled out by biological sex. And men got pretty much all the good stuff.
My TIM "friend" claimed I was mansplaining to "her", so I'm done being friends by TurtleFuzz in GenderCritical
[–]ladyreason 27 insightful - 10 fun27 insightful - 9 fun28 insightful - 9 fun28 insightful - 10 fun - 2 years ago (0 children)
But you're a woman! Isn't misgendering someone literal violence? How could she?!
[–]ladyreason 26 insightful - 2 fun26 insightful - 1 fun27 insightful - 1 fun27 insightful - 2 fun - 2 years ago* (0 children)
It's kind of a self fulfilling prophecy though.
When you're being treated horribly by your peers you really have few options other than your computer.
I would have loved to be better socialized growing up, but every time I tried to socialize with my female peers they would ridicule me. Sometimes for my interests, sometimes for my looks, always for coolness points with onlookers. The computer was something I understood. It took input and gave predictable output. It worked in a logical fashion. It did cool stuff. It didn't judge me, or call me names, or put terrible things in my locker, or start horrible rumors about me, or throw my gym clothes away, or tell other people to ostracize me, or pretend to be nice for a short time to set me up for a cruel prank.
It took me years to learn to look people in the eye. Years to stop assuming people, especially women, would automatically hate me the second they met me. It has been literally decades and being surrounded by a large group of women still sets off my fight or flight.
I guess remember that in the middle of all of this chaos is often a scared, scarred, deeply traumatized human whose peers tortured them instead of teaching them how to properly interact socially.
That doesn't mean we should buy into their harmful delusions or let them run roughshod over women's rights, but we should give a little grace there. In a lot of ways, most of them are victims too.
[–]ladyreason 15 insightful - 2 fun15 insightful - 1 fun16 insightful - 1 fun16 insightful - 2 fun - 2 years ago (0 children)
I did want to state that most men in tech that I've worked with are generally decent people. With a very few exceptions I have been treated very well by my male coworkers once I've displayed my competency. A lot of them are socially awkward but I am too so it generally works out.
The fact that I've been married for my whole career probably helped, honestly. Even the more incel ones grok the concept of "she's taken".
I guess understand though that when you're bullied severely over time, you reach a point where you wish you could be someone else, anyone else. The goal isn't even to get people to be nice to you, it would be enough if they would just leave you alone. I think there's a dissociation from self there, further exacerbated by the fact that often, our refuge is to literally escape into being someone else... through books, through video games, through imagination if other options are unavailable.
So when someone says you can literally become someone else, and maybe you secretly already are and that's why you're in so much emotional anguish... it's tempting. So very very tempting.
Add to that the general social awkward (when everyone around you mocks everything you ever do it's difficult to figure out how to properly relate to other people), and the fact that the only girls they've been allowed to observe or interact with without ridicule are in anime and porn, well... spreads hands
[–]ladyreason 39 insightful - 3 fun39 insightful - 2 fun40 insightful - 2 fun40 insightful - 3 fun - 2 years ago* (0 children)
So... as a woman in tech for decades now, I think there are a few things going on.
First, a lot of us nerds were horrifically bullied growing up. I think it may in some ways be easier to say that people didn't like us because of something specific than to feel that people bullied us for, well, us. Retconning into a persecuted minority is tempting.
Second, a lot of them are kind of incels, or at least tend that way. I guess enough yelling about how women have it so much better in life makes some of them want to literally try it out. This is especially obvious in their weird concepts of what a woman actually is and should feel and act like.
Duncan has posted "How I became a Trans Rights Activist, then turned “Gender Critical”. Part 2 " by ladyreason in GenderCritical
[–]ladyreason[S] 9 insightful - 1 fun9 insightful - 0 fun10 insightful - 0 fun10 insightful - 1 fun - 2 years ago (0 children)
I must say he writes very well. Apparently there will be a part 3 next week.
'Matrix' Was Trans Allegory (makes sense: red pilled tech bro, fetish gear and orgies, convert others, beat people up) by MisandryFTW in GenderCritical
[–]ladyreason 10 insightful - 4 fun10 insightful - 3 fun11 insightful - 3 fun11 insightful - 4 fun - 2 years ago (0 children)
... makes less and less logical sense as the story progresses...
Coming to GC Jesus article on Medium by a gay man, Duncan. by aldoushuxleyghost in GenderCritical
Hmm. Quite the cliffhanger.
They're trying to gaslight us all and rewrite history by Heteronormativefuckt in GenderCritical
[–]ladyreason 7 insightful - 2 fun7 insightful - 1 fun8 insightful - 1 fun8 insightful - 2 fun - 2 years ago (0 children)
Well, that explains why things got much weirder, less enjoyable, and made less and less logical sense as time progressed through the trilogy.
Male Trump supporter starts anti-trans chant at rally. Yet we know TRAs will be blame feminists. by AdultFemaleHuman in GenderCritical
[–]ladyreason 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun - 2 years ago (0 children)
I'm sure they'll get super upset about this, but they would never say a word about all the "Kill the TERFs" their side posts everywhere.
And before anyone says it's on both sides, the person who was yelling this is a man, so, not a TERF.
How dare a Baptist congregation turn down a transwoman pastor by dandeliondynasty in GenderCritical
[–]ladyreason 12 insightful - 2 fun12 insightful - 1 fun13 insightful - 1 fun13 insightful - 2 fun - 2 years ago (0 children)
Most Baptist churches don't allow women pastors. That particular branch does but some sources indicate that they don't allow homosexual pastors. So I'm not really sure what this person was expecting.
I mostly feel sorry for the wife and kids.
Feeling politically homeless? Don't count on libertarians to have your back. by ThisReality in GenderCritical
[–]ladyreason 11 insightful - 1 fun11 insightful - 0 fun12 insightful - 0 fun12 insightful - 1 fun - 2 years ago (0 children)
This is especially true given modern technology. We're much better able to even out the strength gap with tools. Secure construction for safety in our homes, automobiles for travel, and yes, weapons... I never want to harm anyone, but if I must to protect myself and my daughters, I will.
Trans women face potential women’s rugby ban over safety concerns by Echoofmiles in GenderCritical
I've seen those. Such eyeroll.
Dude. The fact that you, personally, are a badly out of shape unusually short overweight weakling of a biological male does not mean that your average transwoman would-be professional women's sports playing athlete is.
Bruce Jenner. by Aquadog in GenderCritical
[–]ladyreason 18 insightful - 3 fun18 insightful - 2 fun19 insightful - 2 fun19 insightful - 3 fun - 2 years ago (0 children)
I remember being annoyed about that. I recall commenting to my husband that every woman on the planet had apparently somehow been out-womanned by someone who hadn't even been a woman for a year.
It's a travesty that they slighted Malala. And also half the population of the planet.
When men are better at being women then women. by Eurowoman24 in GenderCritical
[–]ladyreason 14 insightful - 5 fun14 insightful - 4 fun15 insightful - 4 fun15 insightful - 5 fun - 2 years ago (0 children)
I remember thinking "but they haven't even BEEN a woman for a year and they've already outwomanned us all? What are the rest of us doing wrong?!"
[–]ladyreason 29 insightful - 12 fun29 insightful - 11 fun30 insightful - 11 fun30 insightful - 12 fun - 2 years ago (0 children)
Many of us have been on daily estrogen for years trying to fool our biology into not letting us get pregnant. Does that make us more womany or less? I'm going to need a spreadsheet.
I was misgendered today. An older man said 'sorry sir' to me.lets see if you can guess my response.. 1. Screamed about the violence of this comment 2. Cried 3. Went about my day by Finally in GenderCritical
[–]ladyreason 21 insightful - 6 fun21 insightful - 5 fun22 insightful - 5 fun22 insightful - 6 fun - 2 years ago (0 children)
I'm a freakishly tall woman with broad shoulders and I get misgendered on occasion, especially when I'm wearing winter clothes. I'm going with 4 - giggle and then reassure them it's fine when they actually look at me and then get apologetic. Followed of course by 3.
Leave Babysitters Club alone! by GrendelsScaryMom in GenderCritical
[–]ladyreason 10 insightful - 1 fun10 insightful - 0 fun11 insightful - 0 fun11 insightful - 1 fun - 2 years ago (0 children)
Thank you for this. I was able to block it before my kids got to that episode.
Nothing is safe anymore I guess.