Experts Predict LGBTQ Acronym Could Circle The Earth 3 Times By 2022

julesburm1891 · 2022-02-16T04:49:18+00:00

posts about nothing but coffee, Proust, card games, and not having social skills

Hey, hey. I’m suddenly on a traveling sports team that I’ve never once showed any interest in and I totally got invited to a scenario straight out of a soft core porno. (That’s what women do when they hang out. I’m certain.) My teammates are lesbians except they’re also straight and bi and they want to fuck me even though I don’t pass. But TERFs make me feel bad about myself so that’s why I’m not having sex with any of these totally real lesbians.

julesburm1891 · 2021-02-22T00:53:13+00:00

Gotta love that they keep admitting transmen are women by continuously calling gay men misogynistic.

julesburm1891 · 2021-02-17T02:09:25+00:00

do u know a sub for trans/nonbinary lesbians?

Bruh, you’re on it.

julesburm1891 · 2021-10-03T04:31:58+00:00

I absolutely would pay to see a film when the villain defeats Bond by whispering “only women have a cervix.”

julesburm1891 · 2021-04-19T17:26:49+00:00

Schrödinger’s transbian: simultaneously sleeping with all the lesbians and angry because lesbians won’t give him the time of day. (I don’t think we have to open the box to figure out what’s really going on here.)

julesburm1891 · 2021-01-03T14:09:36+00:00

“Lesbians will figuratively suck our dicks by upvoting TWAW, but they won’t literally suck them and that makes me feel bad” is this clown’s argument.

julesburm1891 · 2020-09-24T11:55:31+00:00

OP: I use birth control because I’m fucking three dudes.

Also OP: Bold of you to assume what kind of sex I’m having

julesburm1891 · 2022-03-05T22:24:12+00:00

Say the women exclusively chasing dick…

julesburm1891 · 2021-01-04T16:59:25+00:00

If there’s one thing I’ve learned, it’s that the transbians who insist they pass are always the ones that look like Ted Cruz in a wig.

julesburm1891 · 2020-10-06T17:37:33+00:00

Sir, these women aren’t making a move or complimenting you because they are not interested in you. You’re a man and they’re lesbians. It will never happen. Take a hint and bugger off.

julesburm1891 · 2020-09-17T19:07:42+00:00

How did the gays escape and can they take us with them?

julesburm1891 · 2021-08-25T17:57:51+00:00

K. So go suck a dick and leave us alone. 🤷🏻‍♀️

julesburm1891 · 2021-07-02T17:31:06+00:00

Some of us learned a foreign language. Some of us learned to code. Some of us took up baking. Some of us became woodworkers. Aaaanndd some of us went fucking crazy.

julesburm1891 · 2021-02-24T12:14:55+00:00

Maybe try other trans people.

This response made me spit my tea out. Maybe this should be our default answer.

julesburm1891 · 2020-07-26T20:31:27+00:00

“Let’s prove the TERFs wrong. So would you feel comfortable in a relationship with a trans woman?”*

*Any lesbian who gives an honest answer of no will have her comments deleted, be blocked from the sub, and get a bunch of rape threats in her inbox. But, this is totally proving the TERFs wrong! Uwu.

julesburm1891 · 2022-02-13T01:02:27+00:00

Painfully accurate

julesburm1891 · 2021-09-10T17:55:29+00:00

Reminds me of the time I went to look at a used car with “barely noticeably body damage” and the entire passenger door was crushed in.

julesburm1891 · 2021-03-13T01:00:08+00:00

Sam Smith: I want to exclude myself from the award categories.

Also Sam Smith: Hey, why am I not included in the award categories?

julesburm1891 · 2021-12-13T17:08:39+00:00

I maintain the “it’s a dick but it’s flaccid and nonfunctional” is the weirdest flex. Imagine if someone offered you an Audi and you replied, “No thanks. I only drive Japanese-made.” And then they respond, “Well how about this Yugo instead?” In what world does anyone want the shittiest possible version of a thing they don’t like?

julesburm1891 · 2021-11-14T15:30:46+00:00

I’m a polyamorous slut but I can’t bring myself to say the word vagina!

julesburm1891 · 2022-05-25T16:59:31+00:00

It truly is.

julesburm1891 · 2021-10-25T22:53:20+00:00

This man has bodies under his floorboards. Change my mind.

julesburm1891 · 2021-01-04T01:01:35+00:00

I’m a Muslim and I worship the Norse pantheon get over it. :)

julesburm1891 · 2022-02-12T23:01:31+00:00

Are you telling me this isn’t what gay guys are looking for?

julesburm1891 · 2021-10-03T12:53:29+00:00

I suppose this would open up a whole new line of villains: one JKR tweet, a Joe Rogan podcast, a mirror, the mere mention of LGB Alliance, etc.

julesburm1891 · 2021-01-23T21:24:49+00:00

Schrödinger’s trans. Lesbians are horrible monsters because they won’t date us AND lesbians are queuing up to date us.

julesburm1891 · 2020-10-30T02:25:56+00:00

Trans: LGB and straight people won’t sleep with us. Bigots!!

Also trans: Some people actually find us attractive and want to sleep with us. Creeps!

julesburm1891 · 2021-09-13T15:09:25+00:00

quietly contemplates sex with a delusional man to pettily give £1B to LGB Alliance

If you do anything, do it for spite.

julesburm1891 · 2021-03-28T03:03:56+00:00

I’m puzzled that they call themselves thesilentchief because they never shut up and mind their business.

julesburm1891 · 2020-10-29T19:05:26+00:00

“I’m bi, does this mean I can pretend to be lesbian?” would’ve been a more accurate post from OP.

julesburm1891 · 2020-10-26T23:18:40+00:00

If Yaniv was allowed to compete, he’d still sue when he came in dead last.

julesburm1891 · 2020-09-14T15:16:06+00:00

Does this mean Burger King is going to start selling tacos that identify as burgers?

julesburm1891 · 2020-08-04T22:26:25+00:00

“The LGBT already have separate social groups that meet specific needs.”

Biggest laugh I’ve had in a while.

julesburm1891 · 2020-07-26T17:05:36+00:00

Are they actually admitting that transwomen are larping as women?

julesburm1891 · 2022-05-11T17:54:04+00:00

I laughed so hard I choked on my coffee and scared a coworker. Thank you.

julesburm1891 · 2022-01-14T03:23:35+00:00

Let me sell you on the worst possible version of a thing you already don’t like.

julesburm1891 · 2022-01-09T22:02:56+00:00

Girl, if you can’t outgrow your homophobia, at least go a size up your in your pants because you have outgrown those.

julesburm1891 · 2021-12-18T13:53:49+00:00

My favorite part of this is still how she walks into a gay bar, people look at her, no one makes a pass at her or even seems to talk to her, and she decides they all want to fuck her.

julesburm1891 · 2021-11-14T15:26:27+00:00

You’re telling me this isn’t the stuff of gay men’s dreams, Chunkee?

julesburm1891 · 2021-04-01T00:39:54+00:00

Being a TRA seems to be the closest you can get to experiencing the French Revolution in the present day. No matter how radical you are today, you’ll be considered a reactionary terf tomorrow.

julesburm1891 · 2021-02-15T19:28:34+00:00

It’s like the weirdest job posting. “Wanted: Woman, five years of trans experience, other genders as assigned.”

julesburm1891 · 2021-01-02T13:24:45+00:00

don’t know how to interact with people like a healthy human being

Well, that’s for damn sure.

julesburm1891 · 2020-09-26T12:17:42+00:00

Outside.

julesburm1891 · 2020-09-23T02:00:49+00:00

I enjoyed where someone said he should’ve married a transman if he wanted biological kids and Benjamin had the gall to act offended. The guy runs a website that tells LGB to bone trans people or we’re bigoted monsters. But it’s offensive if someone says the same to him?

julesburm1891 · 2020-07-23T18:51:30+00:00

I wonder if any of these folks have considered having a personality instead of being consumed by made-up labels.

julesburm1891 · 2020-07-21T02:09:10+00:00

Are you serious? He looks even more ridiculous than Fred Armisen in the Portlandia lesbian book store skits.

julesburm1891 · 2020-07-20T21:00:40+00:00

Guess pansexual now isn’t woke enough and they have to make a new category.

julesburm1891 · 2022-03-31T22:28:54+00:00

It’s really something that the top two complaints are:

Women don’t want to fuck us.
Women want to fuck us.

julesburm1891 · 2021-12-13T16:31:40+00:00

Transbians are the biggest crybullies in existence.

Transbians: suck my dick

Lesbians: uh, no. I don’t like dick

Transbians: waxes on about how great their dicks are in every fucking post

Lesbians: omg, stop. We don’t like dick.

Transbians: let me give you extensive details about my dick.

Lesbians: shut the fuck up. Dicks are disgusting and we don’t like them.

Transbians: I’m so put upon because the lesbians shame me for having a dick.

julesburm1891 · 2021-09-23T00:50:52+00:00

Tbh, that’s a badge of honor at this point.

julesburm1891 · 2021-08-18T03:43:42+00:00

I’m sure, much to his chagrin, Kyle’s friends hassle him about his crazy ex-girlfriend all the time.

julesburm1891 · 2021-06-28T18:03:19+00:00

Milos Zeman: gives an honest answer to a direct question

CNN: how dare he give an answer we don’t like because it happens to be June!

julesburm1891 · 2021-04-12T14:20:23+00:00

I don’t get how they think pushing shriveled, floppy dick is going to sway anyone. It’s the one thing grosser than a regular dick.

julesburm1891 · 2021-03-14T03:25:34+00:00

Transbians: harass lesbians, take over every lesbian space, and threaten lesbians who don’t comply with rape and physical harm

Gaydens: harass gay men ad nauseam, get gay men’s spaces shut down, and advocate rape by deception

Regular straight people: exist

Pink News: well obviously regular straight people are the problem here

julesburm1891 · 2021-02-14T01:43:55+00:00

Wait I’m white, rich, and conservative?

I’m sure you can identify as such. Zero basis in reality? Well, reality is a social construct.

julesburm1891 · 2021-02-14T00:48:54+00:00

Actually, in general, dating bigots is just awful, I expect, must be awful having to date someone so hateful; I couldn’t do it

Proceeds to write a lengthy and hateful scree about lesbians

A lot of the lesbian-identified transphobic bigot brigade are “political lesbians”, i.e. celibate straight women, and honestly, I like to fuck and these chicks don’t fuck.

Lesbians don’t fuck men regardless of how they identify, but we’re very happy to fuck women on a frequent basis.

I bet they think food with onions in it is a bit too spicy

Their entire rant is nothing but bizarre and unfounded accusations, but this was the pinnacle. I don’t even know what to say. I’m just going to go back to eating my chips and habanero salsa.

julesburm1891 · 2021-02-03T18:13:06+00:00

I like that the author of the original comment continued with

My partner does enjoy penetration very much

Who on earth wants to get fucked with a flaccid, floppy dick? Who? Definitely not straight men or lesbians. Certainly not straight women, gay men, or bi men and women. Hell, if my partner announced she wanted to use some flabby, deflated dildo the next time she wore the strap, I’d tell her she’d lost her damn mind because there’s no way that could feel good.

julesburm1891 · 2021-01-19T19:05:57+00:00

“Biden picks Dr. Rachel Levine, a straight white man, as assistant health secretary as per usual. LGB people told this means equality and recognition for them.”

julesburm1891 · 2020-11-22T16:35:55+00:00

So, my fiancée saw this on Reddit this morning. Y’all, I found a keeper.

https://imgur.com/a/rvbIWFJ

julesburm1891 · 2020-08-12T17:05:10+00:00

HAHA—homosexual appropriating heterosexual assholes

julesburm1891 · 2022-05-15T22:01:34+00:00

If you’re a black transwoman, you better clear your calendar. Because all fourteen of you have to be available to change all history at any given moment.

julesburm1891 · 2022-05-08T23:17:44+00:00

pretending we are doing anal

Hold up. Why is she pretending to do anal to affirm her gender when she has an asshole?

julesburm1891 · 2022-04-10T02:28:42+00:00

I’m starting to think there are fewer Pokémon than made up TQ+ labels.

julesburm1891 · 2022-04-08T03:53:16+00:00

How do they actually expect people to believe they have female brains or have feminine souls when they’re completely obsessed with their dicks?

julesburm1891 · 2022-02-16T00:39:16+00:00

Some of my favorite comments:

i hate the “just be t4t” sentiment as if that’s even an ‘available’ option for most trans mlm

Are you saying you aren’t open and available to dating the sex to which you aren’t attracted?

Its like telling someone who WANTS relationships outside of t4t to just give up because they will never be good enough for a cis person

A. Why do you WANT a relationship outside of t4t if transmen are men? Are they not good enough for you? Why? B. You are literally complaining because people are recommending you date “cis” men who are into females.

Also from what I’ve seen a lot of gay trans guys prefer cis guys anyway

Again, if transmen are men, why do you prefer biological men? Why are you allowed to prefer biological men and biological men are not?

It’s like telling someone to only date their own race.

15 February 2022. Let it be known on this date that I am setting aside a dollar for LGB Alliance every time I hear or see someone compare homosexuality (or heterosexuality) to racism. On New Year’s Eve, I’ll make a donation with the final total.

julesburm1891 · 2022-01-19T16:04:37+00:00

Are you implying, as a lesbian, you wouldn’t be interested in dating a man who’s rude, unemployed, has borderline personality disorder, is lacking in social skills, has serval fake illnesses, and who wants to cheat on you? The very nerve.

julesburm1891 · 2022-01-04T02:40:33+00:00

Excuse you. They all live in Canada.

julesburm1891 · 2021-12-06T13:41:49+00:00

If you actually grind like lesbians do, you will smash your balls into an unrecognizable pulp. We ask that you please attempt this and spare us all the possibility of you procreating.

julesburm1891 · 2021-11-10T22:17:52+00:00

“I didn’t watch lesbian porn like those straight guys. I just watched it as a straight male and fantasized about being a woman…which is totally not AGP or anything.”

julesburm1891 · 2021-11-03T14:20:21+00:00

TQ+: I need a genderless sex toy that mimics neither a penis nor a vagina because those are gendered.

Also TQ+: Genitals are genderless! A penis can be feminine! A vagina can be masculine!

julesburm1891 · 2021-04-12T12:34:08+00:00

The OP’s username is Go4Brony so I really can’t say I’m surprised

julesburm1891 · 2021-02-27T13:51:59+00:00

But has Ian McKellen overcome his genital fetish and examined his cis gay privilege?

julesburm1891 · 2021-02-19T02:42:47+00:00

The short version of this article: JKR exists and that’s why (and the only reason why) people across political aisles and sexual orientations are beginning to question the demands of the trans lobby. We’re going to start off by saying, with zero evidence, that she’s making the UK a hate haven, but then we’re going to drag all of Western Europe into the equation and just tack Poland and Hungary on at the end for no discernible reason.

julesburm1891 · 2021-02-05T20:46:31+00:00

Straight man: lesbians who won’t have sex with men are white nationalists.

LGB people: https://imgur.com/a/NstlhLv

julesburm1891 · 2020-11-04T18:17:48+00:00

So, uh, clearly I’m in the minority here, but I’m a lesbian and I don’t want to fuck any man, gay or otherwise.

julesburm1891 · 2020-10-21T19:32:01+00:00

Because these are the same people dumb enough to partake in multi-level marketing.

julesburm1891 · 2022-05-18T20:56:35+00:00

These incels are resorting to desperate measures to fund their Funko Pop collections.

julesburm1891 · 2022-02-16T14:21:42+00:00

Honestly, I feel like it would be highly entertaining to watch these guys actually go to a sleepover and to see all their fantasies crumble in front of them in real time.

julesburm1891 · 2022-01-24T21:12:35+00:00

I am deceased.

julesburm1891 · 2022-01-18T18:10:36+00:00

I once threw my arm around a guy at a bar to tell him how much he looked like Buddy Holly. Unlike OP, he was able to discern that I was just high af and not hitting on him.

julesburm1891 · 2022-01-15T02:27:57+00:00

I think it has to be satire because the gay pride flag is the tiny base strip of the cone. If it was real, everything would be the trans flag.

julesburm1891 · 2021-12-11T15:58:44+00:00

Straight men are interested in women and gay men are not. Imagine that.

julesburm1891