Moving to France doesn't make you French

firebird · 2020-08-09T21:05:21+00:00

"Suck my baguette, bigot!"

firebird · 2020-07-19T16:26:58+00:00

That last comment though. They're always complaining about how many lesbians don't want to have sex with them, and now all of a sudden most lesbians just love transwomen? Are we talking about some sort of Schrödinger's lesbian here?

firebird · 2020-07-22T11:38:11+00:00

Then surprise us.

firebird · 2020-10-03T21:20:05+00:00

I messed up here since there are songs with men.

Let's hope the mod doesn't find out. According to legend she starts banning people left and right if she hears so much as one word uttered by a man.

firebird · 2020-08-04T15:13:43+00:00

I came across that thread as well yesterday, my favourite response was this one person who tried to give an example of 2+2=5 but ended up giving an example of 2.5+2.5=5.

firebird · 2020-08-03T16:52:43+00:00

A while ago I went over to the non-binary subreddit to find an answer to that exact question. The vast majority of the posts were about how they should present themselves so that people would recognize them as non-binary and stuff like that.

Don't get me wrong, I think it's fine to have a community where people can talk about dressing/having hairstyles/doing make up in a way that's creative and doesn't make you look like a stereotype, I simply don't get why it has to framed the way they do it. And that sub definitely has not given me an answer.

firebird · 2020-07-19T14:55:10+00:00

The colour scheme makes it the ultimate representation of womanhood, duh

firebird · 2020-10-03T13:31:35+00:00

Great cover, I have to admit I'm a bit confused by why there's a long silence at the end of the video though.

firebird · 2020-07-29T18:55:52+00:00

Sorry to be the bearer of bad news. I know they have (had?) a substantial lesbian fanbase, so I'm sure you're not alone in feeling this way

firebird · 2020-07-29T15:31:42+00:00

Just as an FYI, the lead singer started identifying as a transgender man last year (after years of being out as a lesbian)

firebird · 2020-10-03T19:34:23+00:00

For me as well!

firebird · 2020-09-09T12:39:39+00:00

Thought that was a compromise as well, but I've since learned that there are people who will consider "they" offensive if you use it instead of their preferred pronouns.

firebird · 2020-09-07T12:51:39+00:00

Such a beautiful music video. Thanks for sharing

firebird · 2020-08-16T19:37:00+00:00

I know you posted this here for the fetish part, but what really stood out to me was this part:

I recommend the Wikipedia page if you want to know specifics

And then they tell us to read books and do our research properly.

firebird · 2020-08-09T21:33:13+00:00

Sapiosexuals, I think they're called. How on Earth do some people think they're special because they want to be with someone they can have intelligent conversations with?

firebird · 2020-08-05T18:42:49+00:00

A few highlights:

Don’t ask for or publish a person’s criminal history unless it’s completely relevant. Be aware that trans people are disproportionately criminalized and policed. If the person you’re reporting on has a criminal record, reporting that information could have consequences for that person. For instance, it could make it harder for an individual to find work. Reporting on that criminal record also perpetuates stereotypes about trans people. If that history is not relevant to the story, you should not report it. If it is, you should consult with the individual about whether they are comfortable with that information being published. Before proceeding, discuss the potential negative impact publishing such information could have on them. You may need to find a different source or give the source anonymity if you cannot proceed with the story without publishing their criminal history. Publishing such information is rarely in the public interest. Consider killing a story if you have no alternatives.

Need to publish a trans person's criminal history because it's relevant to the story? Well, better kill the story instead. That's not censoring at all, what do you mean?

report carefully on anti-trans hate Like anti–gay rights groups or climate science deniers, anti–trans rights groups and individuals push a fringe, radical agenda. Leading medical and psychology organizations like the American Medical Association and the American Psychological Association affirm trans people exist; these organizations also state that trans people need access to gender-affirming care, gender-appropriate public resources, and jobs where they can be themselves. Giving anti–trans groups a platform isn’t being unbiased, but rather giving fringe ideology outsized influence. When reporting on these groups or quoting people with this ideology, take care to fact-check their claims within the article. Do not spread disinformation.

Instead of spreading misinformation, consider saying things like "biological sex is a spectrum", "there isn't that much of a difference between a clitoris and a penis" and "transwomen menstruate too".

avoid giving a platform to TERFs or so-called “gender critical feminists”
Some anti-trans rights groups and individuals use the euphemism “gender critical feminism” to describe their hateful ideology. They are also sometimes called “trans exclusionary radical feminists” or TERFs. This ideology should not be elevated in the press. When reporting on fringe groups and hate groups, instead of calling them TERFs or gender critical feminists, use language like transphobic, anti-trans, etc. Avoid referring to anyone as a feminist when they are spreading anti-trans hate.

Don't refer to the people advocating for women's rights and equal treatment as feminists, please. That's just self-evident.

firebird · 2020-08-04T09:58:39+00:00

She found that doctors often argued that patients implicitly consented to being enlisted in medical teaching when visiting a teaching hospital, or that consent for one gynecological procedure encompassed consent for any additional, related exams.

This is nonsense. I'm not American, and where I live I've met plenty of doctors who made it a point to get everyone's consent before students got involved. Sometimes to the point that it got difficult to actually have patients the students could train with because the patients either said no or the doctors themselves already decided that bringing in students for certain patients wasn't a good idea. I have yet to meet a student who made an issue out of this, the culture is mostly even one where patients who volunteer are thanked afterwards. And everyone is aware that when a patient doesn't want you there, you get kicked out of the room.

I'm still very much aware that not every doctor over here is like that, and some show horrible disrespect towards their patients rights and wishes, but I just wanted to show that it's absolute nonsense to act like "this is just the way things go and have to go".

firebird · 2020-07-21T13:37:46+00:00

Everyone goes along with it too. I remember a post on that sub where a transwoman was talking about refusing to play any male characters in a certain game even if switching would benefit the team. The commenters were supportive of this, while I'm 100% certain they would have shred a "cis" man to pieces over deciding he refused to play any female characters.

firebird · 2020-07-19T18:12:31+00:00

We should go after both, this isn't some either or scenario. Pornhub creates both a demand and a platform for trafficking, on top of the many other problems it causes, so yeah, we should definitely get rid of it. Society would be much better off.

firebird · 2020-07-06T14:50:40+00:00

Yeah I'm sure that's what really goes on during conversion therapy. They just sit gay people down and have a nice chat with them about accepting themselves.

/s, obviously.

firebird · 2020-07-03T12:54:09+00:00

Turning to violence when you don't like something, that will surely show people that you're the one who's in the right here.

Sarcasm aside, I don't think there's an equivalent for the antipornography subreddit on here yet, is there? Maybe we could make one?

firebird · 2022-05-09T11:25:57+00:00

Archive: https://archive.ph/MCUxj

firebird · 2020-11-17T22:17:27+00:00

Perhaps interesting (and inspirational) to know: this singer-songwriter is deaf. She lost her hearing at the age of 18, but did not let that stop her from having a music career.

firebird · 2020-10-31T18:06:22+00:00

This song was written about a real woman called Erzsébet Báthory, who is believed to be the most prolific female murderer although some still believe the entire story was a conspiracy to take down a woman who was considered far too powerful back then: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Elizabeth_Báthory

firebird · 2020-09-23T13:23:56+00:00

Thank you for answering my (nosy) question, I think I now at least have a general idea what this is about. I'd also like to say I'm sorry you feel like you're not welcome anywhere. With the current state of the world I feel like a sense of community is more important than ever. Especially if we'd ever like to tackle the many issues plaguing us.

firebird · 2020-09-23T11:31:17+00:00

I'm curious now. I understand that you don't want to directly state what this is about, but maybe you could say whether it's something directly GC related or something entirely different that leaves you in fear of being banned?

And just know that you're not alone. I've seen others talk about being censored here too, some even to the point of starting their own community.

firebird · 2020-09-23T11:05:58+00:00

Right? It makes no sense, because this is a word that should be important to them as it gives them language to describe things that actually harm them, and they have rendered it meaningless. TRAs don't even seem to care about that.

firebird · 2020-09-23T10:36:25+00:00

Keep in mind that several of the trans women claiming their genitals started smelling like "lady bits" have described this smell as "fishy", which is a sign of trouble for someone with actual "lady bits".

Once again shows they don't know anything about female bodies, yet we are supposed to see their words as proof that they are actual women.

firebird · 2020-09-23T10:14:50+00:00

I've seen lots of people claim that it is helpful, but I've been thinking about it a lot myself and I don't see how. For me there's similarities with self-harm, and in that case I understand that in the moment it might feel like a strange sort of distraction, relief or even comfort, but overall it's obvious that no healing is going to come through that path. Basically, I can understand why they might be doing this, but I don't think it's good for anyone, no.

My main reason for not bringing up arguments for this aspect of the rape porn debate is like I said, they're not a threat to anyone else. And I highly doubt that the support for the continued existence of rape porn in some form is for the benefit of this group. It seems more likely that people benefit from these people being around, because that gives them an excuse to keep rape porn around as well, with the added bonus of less scrutiny because now they can label it as a form of self-therapy or something.

firebird · 2020-09-22T21:10:01+00:00

An important distinction to make here is which side is talked about. Especially since at one point there's talk of it being self therapy. If it concerns a rape survivor who tries to deals with it by using rape porn from this perspective, that's something entirely different from someone whose fantasy is themselves raping someone.

A second thing that seems important to note is that it is known that porn in general always leads you further down the rabbit hole. You become numb to what you've been watching, and start looking for something more extreme, and this cycle keeps continuing. So even if (and that's a big if) this is just their outlet for now, it won't stay that way. I think there are sources on this phenomenon on this sub, if you're interested.

Third point: by watching this sort of thing, you're normalizing it for yourself. Just look at the abuse portrayed routinely in porn: there's more and more coverage and statistics about men starting to imitate these behaviours in the bedroom, while the women they're with never consented. If porn was merely an outlet, this stuff wouldn't happen.

Fourth: all these arguments essentially hinge on one thing, that having a fantasy of raping someone is somehow just part of someone's sexuality, or a kink, or whatever you want to call it. It is not, since rape has to do with power, not sex. Again, it's different if it's someone who has a fantasy about being raped, but I think we can agree they don't really pose a threat to anyone, so I'm assuming those are not the people whose arguments you are looking to counter.

The fifth point follows out of the fourth: if it's not part of a healthy sexuality, and if other people might get harmed because of it, the solution should be treatment of some sort, not to feed this fantasy. I don't think anyone has ever been cured of anything by engaging in the same harmful behaviour over and over again, even if it is in a different form.

While not completely the same, I think what is talked about in this article is similar enough, so I'm including it as a source that might interest you: https://filia.org.uk/news/2020/9/10/not-a-victimless-crime-how-child-sex-abuse-dolls-facilitate-crimes-against-children

This is all I could come up with right now, but I'm really tired so I'm sure there are things I missed that I hope someone else might be able to help you out with.

firebird · 2020-09-13T12:45:00+00:00

I've read about the consequences of getting your breasts removed. Doesn't sound at all like celebrating to me.

firebird · 2020-09-09T19:55:33+00:00

As it turns out, I have already tried talking to you about some similar stuff, but on the old sub. We didn't find any common ground then either, so I think it's for the best if we just leave it at this.

firebird · 2020-09-09T18:23:33+00:00

It is. You don’t call someone something they find that insulting on accident or without malice.

Just because you have decided this, doesn't make it so. Take me as an example. ESL. Did not know the importance of a simple space. Could have called someone a "transwoman" without knowing that they found it to be incredibly insulting.

So you are fine with someone calling someone fat even though they know they would prefer not to be addressed that way?

If it's the truth, then yes.

No you make the debate impossible because you refuse even basic courtesy of not openly insulting the opposite side.

We have been debating this one word that you consider an insult the entire time, and I have not used it against you once. I have done you this 'courtesy', now you do me one by not accusing me of things I obviously didn't do.

Not at all. It’s my present and I embrace it. You want me defined by a deeply unpleasant past.

I don't "want" to define you by anything. None of use have a choice in this, we're all defined by the exact same thing.

You know very well it’s an insult to call a trans women a man.

So you're accusing me of lying.

You just don’t care.

Stop assuming what other people think and feel. You're obviously not good at it.

And whatever you are a free person, but you can’t expect beneficial dialogue when you openly insult the other people involved.

Again, I have not used this word you consider an insult against you, even though I don't agree that it's an insult. Still, I haven't gotten a beneficial dialogue. Instead you have accused me multiple times of things I did not say or do. Clearly, you agree that this is not my fault because I have played by the rules. The only other person left in this conversation is you.

firebird · 2020-09-09T17:35:28+00:00

Calling a trans woman a man is every bit as hateful.

That would mean that hatred is the intent if using that word, like it is with the homophobic slur you gave as an example. It isn't.

And you are saying “ well I’m going to call you that because it’s not an insult because I say it isn’t. And how dare you try to control my speech.”

Not what I was saying. Not sure why you care about the nuance of the absence or presence of a space between trans and woman, but when it comes to my words you can throw all nuance out the window and twist it into anything you like.

Any other label on any other group in that scenario and you would readily agree that the person using the objectionable term was in the wrong.

Not "any other label". Labels specifically designed to harm people. I'm sure plenty of people consider "fat" to be an insult, but I wouldn't automatically label someone using the label to be in the wrong.

You can’t have civil discourse with people who can’t even give basic courtesy of not openly insulting you.

If one side needs that word to be able to voice their perspective, you can't just call it an insult and blame the other side for not being able to have a debate. You make the entirety of the debate on this topic impossible based on the grounds of something entirely emotional.

It is at once a denial of agency

You can't deny something that wasn't there to begin with. You have no agency when it comes to sex, and TRAs keep saying that there is no agency involved in gender either.

a demand we define ourselves by our sex

Sex is important in some ways, and when it comes to those ways, it is important to define people by sex, yes.

a challenge to the legitimacy of trans people at all

How so? A transgender person is transgender because of their sex. That's the whole point.

a call to behave properly as our sex

That's the exact opposite of what GC people call for.

an intended insult

It's not, I told you a hundred times before. You may consider it an insult yourself, but that does not make it an intended insult.

an effort to do mental harm by triggering dysphoria

Again, assuming that there is some harmful intent behind someone using the word 'man', instead of thinking that maybe they have something bigger than that they're trying to say.

defining by an unpleasant medical history or at best body image issue

Then you should have an issue with the term "trans woman" as well.

firebird · 2020-09-09T16:43:38+00:00

It is the same thing.

A slur exclusively used to express hate of a certain group is not the same thing as a term based on a concept that exists across multiple species.

The point is if they can’t do the basic, basic courtesy of not being openly and antagonistically insulting, it won’t ever get anywhere.

That's not what is happening here. What is happening is that you want people to stop using words that are of vital importance to the debate just because you have certain feelings around it. What you are saying is "I only want to have a debate about this when there is no longer a debate to be had".

What would you like explained.

I wanted to know why a term designed to hurt people who are different in some way is more pleasant to you than a term that's merely a description of a concept that simply exists in the world. "Deviant freak" is inherently negative, while "man" is neither positive nor negative.

firebird · 2020-09-07T12:34:29+00:00

What's the title of your novel?

firebird

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