I'm done

book_hoarder · 2022-06-01T00:40:05+00:00

What I read in that screenshot was one woman talking about how some lesbians might be able to tolerate sex with men by dissociating from it (which is actually a common trauma response...), and another woman talking about how she never wanted to have sex with her boyfriend in the past, but didn't think she was a lesbian because she was "able to grin and bear it." None of that sounds like they were "fine with having sex with men." It sounds like they were forcing themselves to have sex they didn't want because they were socially conditioned to believe that they should. Which is heartbreaking.

book_hoarder · 2022-06-01T00:22:57+00:00

There is a difference between a woman who "has sex with men" (present tense) and a woman who "has had sex with men" (past tense). Most people here would agree with you that the former is not a lesbian (in most cases), but the latter potentially is.

I think everyone commenting on this just wants to take me out of context

Or perhaps you aren't stating your grievances very clearly? You posted those two comments in your thread about lesbophobia on Ovarit and I, like everyone else, was left scratching my head over what was so 'phobic about it.

book_hoarder · 2022-06-01T00:08:37+00:00

I keep getting recommended this on Amazon. I think I might download the audiobook now.

book_hoarder · 2022-06-01T00:01:34+00:00

I mean, if you want to redefine yourself just because some women who call themselves lesbians don't feel exactly the same way you do, suit yourself.

I fully believe there isn't hope for lesbians now.

I've been out as a lesbian for the past 17 years, and I promise you, no one has showed up to my house and tried to shove a dick down my throat just because a handful of bisexual women have appropriated the label.

book_hoarder · 2022-05-31T23:00:30+00:00

Look, I know where you're coming from. I also grew up in the middle of the gay marriage debate. I met my wife while she was in the military during Don't Ask Don't Tell. I had a high school history teacher who, out-of-the-blue, compared homosexuality to paedophilia on the first day of class. I grew up in a Catholic household where I was regularly told that women who don't have babies are selfish and will come to regret it one day. I just got back from my sister's wedding, where my father called my marriage "disordered" in front of the priest just to get those sweet, sweet, Catholic good-boy points. I had a cousin who grilled me about my sexual orientation for hours, in front of all my brother's friends, because "how do I know I don't like dick if I never tried it?" I've had friends, other family members, coworkers, and even strangers tell me the same thing. And now we have the TQ+ crowd on Twitter telling lesbians that if they don't want to have sex with men or if they have an aversion to dick, there's something wrong with them. Everyone everywhere acts like it's completely unfathomable for a woman to not like dick because it doesn't fit in with their narrow ideas of the world. I get where your frustration comes from and why this is all so upsetting for you because I've been there. All my life, I have dealt with the same exact shit.

That being said, I read the thread that you are referring to, and I don't think that anyone is saying that lesbians should be, or generally are, ok with sleeping with men, nor do I think that anyone is implying that the definition of "lesbian" itself should be expanded to include women who seek out and enjoy having sex with men. I think the point of contention is with the idea that not all lesbians have an active aversion to men and heterosexual intercourse to the point that it would be repulsive and potentially traumatizing to even attempt it. While such may be the case with you (and me and my wife and plenty of other lesbians), I do believe there are some lesbians out there who have engaged in heterosexuality at some point in their lives without experiencing strong feelings towards either extreme, good or bad. I mean, think about it, we live in a society where it's normal for straight women to not experience orgasm during sex 50-60% of the time. We live in a society where a woman's pleasure in bed is merely an afterthought, and she's more likely to get most of her satisfaction from a vibrator than her own male partner. I can 100% believe it possible for a lesbian to have prior relationships with men just based on the fact that even straight women settle when it comes to their sex lives. If your sex life is just as unsatisfying as all the other straight women around you, why would you suspect that there was anything amiss?

Like someone else said in the comments, everyone experiences their sexuality differently. Some people know beyond a shadow of a doubt that they are only attracted to the same sex and want nothing to do with the opposite sex. Other people are so numb to their own emotions and desires (often due to childhood trauma) that they have no clue what they want until they've experienced it. It doesn't invalidate you or your feelings or your experiences. It doesn't make you a freak. It just means that people are different and have lived different lives and may take longer to come to the same conclusion that came so easily to you. There's nothing wrong with that.

book_hoarder · 2021-12-06T15:10:22+00:00

Testosterone makes us more aggressive, we can help that like you can help getting bitchy during your period. We are strongly influenced by hormones.

Yes true, but it's just so often like getting a pet tiger to defend yourself against other tigers. If the tiger is well-trained, it might be a good strategy, but if the tiger decided to turn on you and maul you to death, you're pretty fucked. You might have better luck just buying a gun.

That is awesome, I am happy for you. I wish more people had someone special in their lives. My wife and I both suck at cleaning, but she's pretty awesome too.

Thank you :) Me too. And to be perfectly honest, I'm the messy one in my relationship, but I do try to put in an effort because it makes her happy. I also make up for it by cooking some bomb-ass meals.

Oh come on, if you're a lesbian that tends towards just living with your BFF

LOL, you caught me. But I do think it should be the goal of every marriage. Passionate romance doesn't last forever, and if you have friendship to fall back on, you have a pretty solid foundation for the rest of the relationship. No need to compartmentalize everything.

book_hoarder · 2021-12-06T14:52:40+00:00

Lol, my wife isn't a man. I seem to have triggered you. I'll also have you know that those meals aren't free. I spend all summer growing them, canning them, and storing them for winter. Where do you get your food? From other men working on farms to put it in the grocery store for you?

book_hoarder · 2021-12-06T14:46:39+00:00

Yes, she and I mutually exchange sex for each other's resources. Terrible arrangement, I know.

book_hoarder · 2021-12-06T02:09:34+00:00

better protection

From who? Other men? Except women are more likely to be murdered by their own partners than some strange guy on the street, so I don't buy that for a second.

Don't care about those women

You don't seem care about any women, so how is that surprising?

You've been taught that your own nature is wrong

Lol, ok. But I also have a spouse that treats me well, makes me come, brings in good money, helps me keep the house clean, genuinely enjoys my company, and would probably help me raise the children if we ever decide to have any. I have it pretty damn good and only wish the same for my sisters. If this means that women are no longer gaslit into accepting garbage-level partners (as you are trying to do to me now) and men are forced to step up their game, so be it. Who knows: you may even enjoy connecting with your partner on a genuinely human level. I know I do.

book_hoarder · 2021-12-06T00:43:08+00:00

I can't really argue with the fact that a good number of women grow up conditioned to hate themselves, and therefore, consistently choose terrible partners. It has always been an endless source of frustration for me watching my heterosexual sisters throw themselves at men like you described in the hope that it would somehow fix their dog shit level self-esteem. Thank God for places like Female Dating Strategy, where women are finally waking up the social conditioning we've been fed all our lives and breaking out of such self-destructive dating patterns.

book_hoarder · 2021-12-06T00:29:44+00:00

Isn't lesbian porn one of the top porn categories? I don't watch it anymore, but when I did, there was a fair bit of clitoral stimulation happening, albeit done in a way that looked ridiculous and overly theatrical.

book_hoarder · 2021-12-06T00:24:47+00:00

I agree. But one must first achieve orgasm to make it continuous and ongoing.

book_hoarder · 2021-12-05T13:56:43+00:00

Clearly. No wonder so many women are swinging over to my team. Poor things just want to have an orgasm for once.

book_hoarder · 2021-12-05T01:23:26+00:00

Clean bill of health

Shows picture of a clearly overweight man

This is why "healthy at any size" is bullshit. COVID overwhelmingly effects those who are overweight/obese and even those of a more normal size with hypertension. They should be using this as an opportunity to encourage people to pursue healthier lifestyle choices, to eat better, exercise, lose any excess weight, all of which would also help decrease their likelihood of ending up in the hospital. But instead they're just acting like all these other factors are irrelevant while pushing the vaccine as the only preventative measure. It clearly didn't help in this case.

book_hoarder · 2021-12-05T00:54:16+00:00

How can guys watch so much porn yet still be so clueless about the importance of clitoral stimulation?

book_hoarder · 2021-12-05T00:22:56+00:00

I mean this person's whole post is basically female objectification of men which in large is coming from MLM pornography or erotica. The whole soft gay boi who is pure and innocent is literally a running trope because plenty of women see gay men as less of a threat to them. It's just fantasy and when it's applied to real people dehumanizing.

True, I agree that it's objectifying and dehumanizing. However, the major difference between men objectifying women and women objectifying men, is that the former can lead to some pretty devastating real-life consequences, like rape, murder, and prostitution, while this is rarely true in reverse. I'm aware that it's annoying to have some yaoi-obsessed woman trying to shoe-horn her way into a gay relationship or harassing gay men on a gay-specific Reddit subs (all the lesbian-only subs have been banned already for daring to assert their boundaries in the same way), but for as irritating it might be, most gay men will never fear for their lives in the face of an angry fujoshi.

So to bring up this is a result of straight male objectification to me is putting the blame on the wrong foot

You might think so, but I can't help but see a connection between the proliferation of violent pornography, the normalization of kinky/degrading/painful sex acts, and the increasing number of women and young girls opting out of womanhood/heterosexuality. Women do tend to see gay men as "softer," which is clearly misinformed and based on offensive stereotypes, but it is also why some end up with the misguided view that they will be treated better in a relationship "as a gay man" than they would as a woman in a heterosexual relationship.

The problem is that we have a generation that is becoming increasingly antisocial and is looking more and more towards erotic or pornography to deal with a lack of intimacy and other issues like depression.

Agreed.

Pornography can also be useful in exploring how you feel especially if you are more used to a sexually repressed life or society. It is safer too.

Safer for whom, exactly? Not for the women involved in it. Not for the women and girls trafficked into it. Not for the people who have to endure increasingly violent, painful, humiliating sex for the sake of covering rent, then have those images distributed as widely as possible without any means of retracting them. For as annoying as fujoshis might be, at least most of the porn they indulge in is written or animated and doesn't involve living, breathing human beings.

As for the rest of your comment, I agree 100%.

book_hoarder · 2021-12-02T18:11:52+00:00

https://www.cbsnews.com/news/women-less-likely-to-orgasm-from-casual-sex-hookup/

According to studies done on the subject, women are far less likely to orgasm during casual sex. As it turns out, men don't put much effort into pleasuring a woman they have no emotional investment in. Your straight friends are probably not coming during their casual encounters and just trying to make themselves feel better about being used.

book_hoarder · 2021-12-02T18:06:32+00:00

This. "Sex-positive feminism" is the biggest scam ever sold to women. If "sex positivity" is virtually indistinguishable from your average man's pornographic fantasy, then it is neither feminist nor likely to be very enjoyable for the woman.

book_hoarder · 2021-12-02T15:10:33+00:00

I'm in my early 30s, so maybe it's a bit different for my age group because we didn't grow up with porn being as easy to access as it is now. There use to be some risk involved in looking at porn, as most sites required payment and those that didn't were likely to give your computer a nasty virus. Maybe that's changed with the younger generation and the uninhibited porn access they seem to have. At least from the outside looking in, it seems like girls and women are under more pressure now to imitate what guys see in pornography, which is horrifying in and of itself. I do thank my lucky stars sometimes that I'm not a heterosexual and have a partner who neither watches porn nor expects me to reenact it for them. I can imagine how being constantly subjected to this expectation from men, a woman might get the impression that objectification is an integral part of heterosexual relationships.

book_hoarder · 2021-12-01T15:08:32+00:00

het relationships are based on the man objectifying the woman

Good lord, is this really how straight girls see their own relationships? No wonder they want to opt out of heterosexuality.

gay relationships seem more pure, innocent, soft, and romantic than het relationships

Jesus Christ, no. Have you seen gay dating apps? There's nothing "soft, innocent, or romantic" about them. Also, while gay relationships may be on a slightly more equal footing, they are just as prone to tumult and messiness as straight relationships. I'm willing to bet that the person who wrote this is no older than 14.

book_hoarder · 2021-11-30T23:08:00+00:00

I mean, I suppose if you are going to apply the label "right-winger" or "TERF" to anyone who accurately uses the word "homosexual", then yes, you are correct.

book_hoarder · 2021-11-29T21:08:57+00:00

Yeah, that's what I was thinking. I went through a lot of that shit as well, including the whole wanting to have a penis as a small child. Thankfully, it was a different time then and no one took it seriously.

book_hoarder · 2021-11-29T05:58:45+00:00

Yes. That is why gay people in Iran are forced into transitioning. Because society puts so much pressure on them to be gay. Same with the religious community I was raised in. When they told me that my primary purpose in life was to get married and have as many babies as possible, what they really meant was they wanted me to find a same-sex lover and just lay around eating pussy all day.

How deluded can these people be? Society has been trying to force gay people to be heterosexual in one form or another since the beginning of time. That's why there are so many cultures with "third gender" categories to begin with: because the idea of two people of the same sex being together was so unfathomable, they had to deny their natal sex to make sense of it.

book_hoarder · 2021-11-28T17:32:49+00:00

How awful that they are demonizing women who have been sexually assaulted as a direct result of their shitty policies. Every single day, the LGBTQ+++ community and the Catholic Church share more and more in common.

book_hoarder · 2021-11-28T17:29:06+00:00

I think I fall into both categories.

book_hoarder · 2021-11-28T15:51:32+00:00

Exactly. I don't have to try out every variety of sexual partner and sexual act out there, and potentially open myself up to traumatic experiences, just to know what I like. Sex is extremely personal and can be extremely invasive. If you are not 100% comfortable with the sex you are having before you have it, you probably shouldn't be having it.

book_hoarder · 2021-11-28T02:06:12+00:00

The fact of the matter is, saying you have a genital preference is implying all trans people are the same, their genitals are the same, and that you have evidently experienced every fake dick out there and know you don't like them.

I have never tried out any dick ever and I can safely say that I don't like them. I have also never had anything up my ass or participated in an orgy, but I can safely say I never want to do those things either. People are allowed to decide for themselves what sexual partners they want and what sexual activities they feel comfortable with without "trying them out" first. It's called having boundaries.

book_hoarder · 2021-11-28T02:01:02+00:00

Luckily for me and my wife, we're getting to that age where we've stopped giving a shit what the LGBT "community" thinks of us.

book_hoarder · 2021-11-26T20:22:37+00:00

Lol! I think that's the New Yorker in her.

book_hoarder · 2021-11-26T18:19:59+00:00

I will hand it to Biden, he is quite accomplished at tanking the economy to a point I didn't think was possible in less than a year. All he had to do was leave shit alone, and he could have taken credit for its inevitable improvement in the wake of COVID lockdowns. But no. He somehow managed to make it worse. That in itself is quite a feat.

book_hoarder · 2021-11-26T13:57:54+00:00

"Nobody is that gay" is a phrase that passes my lips far too often

I'm sure it is, you fucking homophobe.

Gay men can and should appreciate women if for no other reasons than because it's biological.

One can "appreciate" something without wanting to fuck it. Also, did this fucker really just say that gay men should be attracted to women because it's "natural"??? That is literal God-tier homophobia right there.

Your desire of things that pleasure you is universal

And some people don't get pleasure from being with a woman. Case fucking closed.

book_hoarder · 2021-11-26T13:49:40+00:00

Or maybe they just want people to stop calling them "blokes" over superficial aspects of the way they dress and behave? Or maybe they just resent how womanhood is reduced to a collection of stereotypes instead of the material reality of their sex? This is the same tired old "lesbians just want to be men" homophobia that butch lesbians have been subjected to since the beginning of time.

They don't lack conviction; they just don't want to be part of your stupid cult.

book_hoarder · 2021-11-26T00:31:07+00:00

You have to be a piss-poor economist to have not seen that coming. You put people out of work for a year, gave out free money, let people remain on unemployment for months, made it impossible for women with school-age children to work outside the home, fucked up the supply chain, and took away people's jobs for not complying with vaccines mandates.

I'm shit at math and have only the foggiest idea of how economics work, but even I saw that shit coming.

book_hoarder · 2021-11-25T13:06:08+00:00

Only if you take it too seriously.

book_hoarder · 2021-11-24T19:05:23+00:00

Same.

book_hoarder · 2021-11-24T19:01:19+00:00

According to Deb on Q Force: "A straight man is just a lesbian with longer cargo shorts, less skills, and evil in his heart."

Hands-down, best line of that show.

book_hoarder · 2021-11-22T21:29:33+00:00

Goddamn, I really do love JKR.

book_hoarder · 2021-11-22T21:17:39+00:00

The funny part is: most of them wouldn't be in positions of power at all. They would be falling all over themselves to prove how "loyal" they are to the Party only to end up in a gulag for not clapping long enough or accidentally spilling coffee on a picture of the Supreme Leader.

book_hoarder · 2021-11-22T21:09:51+00:00

Well, he's not wrong. Calling everyone a racist for not voting the way you like wasn't a winning strategy in the 2016 election and it isn't one now.

book_hoarder · 2021-11-22T13:59:12+00:00

Oh, I have actually read that article. And had a good conversation with my mom about it lol. It definitely is a good explanation for everything going on.

book_hoarder · 2021-11-21T17:03:17+00:00

Good for her. Honestly, I couldn't give a fuck about Rittenhouse, but the fact that so many people are supporting known abusers of women and children is beyond repulsive.

book_hoarder · 2021-11-21T16:46:20+00:00

Not all conditions of your life are external. Read Man's Search for Meaning by Viktor Frankl. The man found ways to alter the conditions of his life from within a concentration camp.

book_hoarder · 2021-11-21T16:31:54+00:00

The point of living is not to be happy. If it were, then it would not be a universal truth that suffering is woven into the very fabric of life. But of course, suffering is not as arbitrary as it may appear. Pain, no matter how great or small, exists to send you a message. When you experience hunger pangs, you get the message to find food. When you put your hand on a hot stove, you get the message to remove it. When you experience psychological pain, it means some condition of your life isn't right and you need to take steps to change it. One can always mitigate suffering, but pain can never be done away with entirely; it will plague you and everyone else every moment of your existence. A big part of overcoming its downward pull is by simply accepting this as fact, in accordance with the central tenants of Buddhism and the Christian prescription to "pick up your cross." It is no coincidence that both religions have instruments of torture as the primary symbols of their faith.

As far as the "point" of your life, no one can tell you that. In a way, no one's individual life has any "point." After all, how many animals exist only to be food sources for other animals? How many millions of organisms do you murder each time you take a step or a breath or swallow? How many people die in senseless accidents every day? Life feeds on life and life exists only for its own sake. It enfolds and expands beyond you, and I would say that the true point of life is to stand in awe of that, to know that life only feels painful because you view yourself through much too small a lens, because you see yourself as a separate being rather than a miniscule atom in a much larger, all-encompassing being.

book_hoarder · 2021-11-17T18:46:37+00:00

I do love how so many of them told him to fuck off though. Seriously, I can't with straight(ish) men agonizing over how the coolest girl they know is a lesbian, and "woe is me, my life does not imitate the plot of Chasing Amy!'" You have 98% of the female population in your dating pool, and still you can't do without the remaining 2%??

As far as the grass being greener, try being smaller and weaker than half the world's population, the other half of whom is known for being violent and sexually aggressive with a history of raping, subjugating, exploiting, and enslaving people within your group. Then imagine trying to exclude these same people from your intimate relationships because, surprise surprise, you aren't very attracted to them. Then imagine these same people fetishizing your intimate relationships, bulldozing their way into your communities, and threatening you with rape and death for refusing to use your body to help them realize their pornographic fantasies about you.

No, the grass is definitely not greener.

book_hoarder · 2021-11-17T17:35:24+00:00

I came here to fight transphobes and I'm not seeing any

Because you banned all of them.

book_hoarder · 2021-11-17T14:06:58+00:00

I use to lurk on an openly misogynistic incel forum just to see what makes them tick. Incels demand to be "validated" through sex in exactly the same way as these TRAs. They even seem to indulge in the same horrific rape fantasies to "punish" those women who won't comply. If you took out all the trans-specific language, the things these TRAs parrot would be virtually indistinguishable from what incels regularly advocate for.

book_hoarder · 2021-11-16T15:50:28+00:00

It isn't other people's job to validate your with access to their bodies. The world is not your gender affirmation clinic.

book_hoarder · 2021-11-16T15:43:59+00:00

Ok, but some people still don't like pineapple on pizza or dicks. So maybe leave them alone instead of trying to shove your preferences down their throats?

book_hoarder · 2021-11-15T19:35:25+00:00

If you're 16-years-old (and have probably never had sex), no adult of sound mind is going to take your "sexuality" seriously. When I was 14-years old, I thought I was straight. When I was 16, I thought I was bi. It took me until 17 or 18 to figure out that I didn't like guys at all. No one has all their shit figured out by the age of 16.

book_hoarder · 2021-11-15T19:15:03+00:00

Whatever you have to tell yourself to ease that cognitive dissonance, I suppose.

book_hoarder · 2021-11-14T22:35:19+00:00

To answer your question. They probably use tools to smooth the edges for inside / round the branches for outside penetration.

So they flay or bore a hole into this poor tree for the explicit purposes of fucking it. Sounds horrifying.

book_hoarder · 2021-11-14T20:58:35+00:00

Question: how does one have sex with a tree? And more importantly: how does fucking a tree not rub your dick raw?

book_hoarder · 2021-11-14T20:10:52+00:00

I don't understand this idea that, after someone chooses to drastically alter their body to the point of becoming undesirable to vast swathes of people, it is the fault of said people for failing to find the changes sexually appealing. Surely, when choosing to transition, you should take into account how much it will impact on your dating/sex life and weigh the costs and benefits accordingly, not demand that other people amend their own desires and expectations to suit your personal choice. I do not demand that straight women "examine their genital preferences" so that I might have a larger dating pool. Rather, I accept that I have a significantly smaller dating pool and operate within those parameters, knowing that it is a better alternative to living in a way that is untrue to myself. No one is under any obligation to tailor their own desires to the demands of your "hole."

book_hoarder · 2021-11-12T22:59:32+00:00

They're right. I haven't the slightest inclination to understand or defend those who rape animals. Your dog didn't consent to be your pet, let alone your paramour.

book_hoarder · 2021-11-12T22:55:20+00:00

Oh yeah. It was definitely a generous estimation.

book_hoarder · 2021-11-12T14:06:59+00:00

How much you want to bet only 5 to 8% of that 30% have ever been in a same-sex relationship?

book_hoarder · 2021-11-11T19:16:25+00:00

Identifies as gay or pan

Pick one. You can't be both.

Never had sex with anyone before marriage

Ah, ok. So he doesn't know if he really likes fucking dudes, he just thinks about them while he's fucking his wife. Got it.

Latter Day Saints

This just in: religious gay man pursues a "mixed-orientation marriage" to avoid going to Hell. But that's alright. At least his wife is happy and thinks the sex is great.

book_hoarder