Ultimate Super Mario Cosplay

anescient · 2019-08-01T14:02:02+00:00

I'm sick of these goofy gender reveals.

anescient · 2019-12-12T18:08:20+00:00

That particular image and the label "fun" aren't ideal, but morbid humor is completely legitimate.

Death doesn't entitle respect. Death can be tragic, heroic, karmic, and slapstick.

I do not agree with "It's never appropriate to joke about [insert_anything_here]."

anescient · 2019-10-09T19:35:19+00:00

The most inept killing spree in history.

anescient · 2019-06-24T04:24:19+00:00

I thought a direct link to some piracy site would be tacky. Choose whatever way you choose to see it. It's not fun.

anescient · 2019-10-20T14:22:58+00:00

Good work, boys. If you'd given him even half of a second longer he could have killed all six of you, easily.

anescient · 2019-06-11T00:53:17+00:00

Yea well if you see a big red arrow like that you should know better than to keep going towards it.

anescient · 2020-01-09T01:51:30+00:00

Good one, ape.

He died several days later. What kind of injury would take so long to kill him?

anescient · 2019-09-23T15:26:50+00:00

Give me a 'gurgle snore'

anescient · 2019-05-07T19:39:03+00:00

He won't do that again.

anescient · 2019-11-19T03:45:03+00:00

the worker had just put a burning newspaper into the septic tank pit to prove the desludging process was complete and done properly

... which makes this a qualified Darwin Award.

anescient · 2019-10-16T03:21:17+00:00

Total commitment, impeccable form. This is the yardstick by which all jumps should be measured.

anescient · 2019-09-20T16:33:19+00:00

It goes beyond that; NASA is faking Las Vegas. Have you ever seen Las Vegas with your own eyes? I haven't.

anescient · 2019-05-07T19:48:12+00:00

They're going to have to give up doing this or get way, way more creatively brutal. Audiences get bored, guys, you're actually eroding the fear at this point.

anescient · 2019-11-09T00:29:25+00:00

Yes, it has to be gold. You owe the victim that much. South American tribal and Spanish conquistador costumes, would be nice, but I won't insist.

anescient · 2019-07-16T19:20:11+00:00

Don't worry about it, we painted over the rust just a few months ago, and almost all of the bolts are tightened.

anescient · 2019-06-05T13:08:50+00:00

That's probably not the speed limit.

anescient · 2019-04-29T15:44:39+00:00

I'm pretty sure that's not what CPR is for.

anescient · 2019-04-03T01:46:29+00:00

That's horrifying.

But.

I really want to see that footage.

anescient · 2019-03-30T03:31:34+00:00

Oh no! .. GUN IT!

I guess if you kill rather than just injure you won't be on the hook for medical bills.

anescient · 2020-06-18T16:08:47+00:00

Don't wanna be late to your own suicide.

anescient · 2020-01-09T03:01:04+00:00

Thanks for the tip. "secondary brain injury" is where the death happens.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Primary_and_secondary_brain_injury#Secondary

anescient · 2019-12-10T04:14:14+00:00

chimpoutvideo.com

Sweet Lord.

anescient · 2019-12-09T19:51:35+00:00

Jesus jumping fuck. Right in the face.

0:15 - 0:28 (boy with the gun): "Look at this! A shell...I'm loading it. I'm going to shoot you, but don't die!"

Isn't that kid a little old for that kind of stupidity?

anescient · 2019-12-03T08:14:23+00:00

This dude wishes he worked with Klaus. This shit is stranger than fiction.

anescient · 2019-11-22T02:20:11+00:00

Whatever the details, wow, what a shit-hole.

anescient · 2019-11-20T20:23:31+00:00

That is not the speed I expected the train to be going.

anescient · 2019-11-09T00:34:18+00:00

https://www.reddit.com/r/trashy/comments/9pdz72/tastefully_sabotaged_anti_suicide_graffiti/

anescient · 2019-11-08T02:11:58+00:00

I know, right? Fuck mentally ill people, what a bunch of assholes.

anescient · 2019-11-05T15:29:37+00:00

I think it has to do with the way they bounce. The tires are bad news and the machines are ridiculous, but they're made for each other, and when they bounce it looks like a fun bounce.

anescient · 2019-11-02T04:54:39+00:00

This is about what I expected, but I thought I'd try something a little more high-brow. It's an unusually slow and shitty way to die, you see.

anescient · 2019-11-01T13:02:45+00:00

Germany is a civilized nation renowned for engineering, but we're still ribbing them about the Nazis. Every one of these videos sets the Middle East's reputation back another 20 years.

anescient · 2019-10-22T17:10:30+00:00

Shplot.

anescient · 2019-10-20T18:36:45+00:00

Nah, fuck that. It's not the groggy, sorry bum's responsibility to keep shit calm and professional.

The cops should have approached the situation differently. He's a sleeping bum; he isn't fucking Magneto.

The reason they fired is evident, but that doesn't mean he was asking for it. Head-butting an elephant's testicles is asking for it. He got up, in a pissy mood, and scratched his gut.

anescient · 2019-09-20T16:31:51+00:00

I see some casualties on makeshift stretchers.

anescient · 2019-09-20T03:19:08+00:00

Does anybody know of any decent guess as to his motive? This apparently had nothing to do with Vegas or the concert; according to wikipedia he was setting up for Lollapalooza but didn't go through with it. He didn't have debts. He didn't target specific people, obviously. I don't think he even had a show-down with the cops. He just sprayed out the window and shot himself immediately.

He also had way too many guns, like, over 20 guns.

What the fuck.

anescient · 2019-08-11T03:29:06+00:00

Remarkably stupid. I had to watch a second time to be sure it wasn't suicide. Come to think of it, he would have had more luck stopping it if he just dove under the wheels.

anescient · 2019-06-24T02:47:24+00:00

Keep this under your hat, kids. 8a813d63507e027b321a746191e79d07f6fc1a65

anescient · 2019-05-26T23:39:02+00:00

If you're gonna get yourself killed, make sure it's funny.

anescient · 2019-05-16T06:16:13+00:00

What's that the kids say, "bitches be trippin'"?

anescient · 2019-05-07T19:44:47+00:00

World War 2 was the greatest soccer game ever played.

anescient · 2019-05-07T19:42:26+00:00

God save that officer. I have never seen a cop in this situation offer to put his gun down.

anescient · 2019-05-01T15:36:46+00:00

Oh god. ... Oh, shit. ... Oh, sh-OH SHIT ... JESUS

Take it easy, there, Fate, I think ya got him.

anescient · 2019-04-26T03:12:55+00:00

If you want to be afraid of airliners, it's simple: watch every last air disaster video this guy's made. If you're like me, you have substantially underestimated the total number of accidents.

anescient · 2019-04-06T19:46:30+00:00

No kind summary is possible. This. Is. Rambling. Madness.

anescient · 2019-04-04T19:15:02+00:00

Hopefully those of you who never understood finally have an understanding of what it was like for our grandparents and what it is still like today.

That is extremely disrespectful to your grandparents.

anescient · 2019-04-04T18:29:01+00:00

TLDR The secret global government of lizard people is using genetically-modified food to spy on your thoughts via WiFi light bulbs.

anescient · 2019-04-04T07:05:17+00:00

... in other words it was not an April Fools joke.

anescient · 2019-04-02T23:07:17+00:00

Yea, neat trick guys.

https://www.nbcnews.com/mach/science/nasa-chief-slams-india-s-terrible-anti-satellite-test-ncna990206

How about let's not turn low earth orbit into the Space Ganges, chuckle-fucks.

anescient · 2019-04-01T21:57:10+00:00

I find that, when browsing around reddit, an appropriate soundtrack can really take the edge off.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a2iS81IRfXI

anescient · 2019-04-01T00:59:13+00:00

You would sell a lot of tickets.

anescient · 2019-03-30T14:31:56+00:00

Lemme guess.

"allahu akbar"

Get some new material.

anescient · 2020-02-23T05:26:45+00:00

Anybody got other video on this? Looks like there's a drone out there.

anescient · 2020-01-12T17:19:05+00:00

Oh I see, that rock kinda jammed. ... OK, so, he's going to lean over to push it and then fall in? ... Okie dokie I guess he's just gonna jump right in. ... And get crushed by a rock? Or the machine? ... Both, of course.

Bravo, Chinese industry.

anescient · 2019-12-08T01:47:31+00:00

A pistol with a drum mag is something for which good and decent people have legitimate use.

anescient · 2019-12-08T01:45:18+00:00

Is it possible he just really hated the kid or one of the parents?

anescient · 2019-11-16T18:24:21+00:00

How can you beg harder for a PTO accident? Stick your tongue to it in winter?

anescient · 2019-11-11T05:03:28+00:00

It's been so, so long since I've learned a new slur.

“CALL DA AMBALAMPS! CALL THE AMBALAMPS!” Says the spear chucker that obviously had a working phone

"spear-chucker"

Magnificent. That's how you spot the real assholes. Any 12-year-old can say "nigger".

anescient · 2019-11-09T07:28:56+00:00

I doubt we'll ever see a proper Roman-style crucifixion, but, eh. It's a grisly death and all, but I don't think it would make for very compelling footage.

anescient · 2019-11-09T07:15:19+00:00

Death in outer space, that is, death by vacuum, has kinda been explored: https://youtu.be/fJbztthNrVQ?t=2003

anescient · 2019-11-09T00:50:35+00:00

I think we've got a good chance at seeing most of those in Chinese industry.

anescient · 2019-11-08T20:28:10+00:00

I can't imagine what having molten gold poured down your throat would look like. Unfortunately the Aztecs didn't have smartphones.

anescient · 2019-11-08T14:39:34+00:00

This is a proud tradition, actually: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Blowing_from_a_gun

anescient · 2019-11-05T02:36:38+00:00

I can't really grasp the weight of these machines and the force they put on the ground. The giant tires just look, I don't know, soft, kinda pillow-y.

anescient · 2019-11-05T02:33:11+00:00

No question it'll haunt him, but I hope he gets beyond guilt. From the look of it he might not have seen her even if he did double-check behind; she came awful close.

anescient · 2019-11-01T13:13:15+00:00

Seriously, come on, guys. If you're into this shit you know what real panic looks like.

anescient · 2019-10-30T01:43:47+00:00

I'm sure this is all to demonstrate power and instill fear and whatever, but all I see are shitty cavemen with futuristic weapons.

anescient · 2019-10-30T01:34:26+00:00

Electricity and India don't mix.

anescient · 2019-10-22T17:33:37+00:00

He was so damn cold about it, like "I'd really rather not, obviously, but at some point you have to man up and rip off the band-aid." It's like he's throwing away something sentimental that's clearly no longer practical. It's like he's got his first bicycle from when he was a kid, the bike he was riding at the moment he saw his parents run over and killed, but facts are facts, this really is just a rusted heap of metal, and there's nothing to gain in keeping it.

anescient · 2019-10-22T17:20:21+00:00

I thought I'd seen "gruesome".

anescient · 2019-10-20T18:52:38+00:00

What's that? You cannot abide the two of us coexisting on this planet? I couldn't agree more; pull that trigger, friend. Good luck with the He-Man Woman-Haters Magic: The Gathering Club or however the fuck you justify chopping off children's genitals.

anescient · 2019-10-19T02:53:47+00:00

For y'all's convenience: https://soundcloud.com/hikariultra/city-morgue-33rd-blakk-glass

anescient · 2019-10-08T03:11:36+00:00

If it really was the clutch, that'd be simple mechanical failure and centrifugal force. It looks like they're running it on a dyno; the engine (and clutch etc.) would be running extremely fast.

anescient · 2019-10-02T18:16:02+00:00

Time will tell.

anescient · 2019-08-28T00:06:19+00:00

Is firing guns into the air some kind of cultural thing in the middle east

Is it ever.

Search liveleak for wedding shootings.

anescient · 2019-07-29T16:04:21+00:00

Weird. Such brutality. So casual.

anescient · 2019-06-29T03:28:48+00:00

Are you sure he's dead.

anescient · 2019-06-27T22:18:40+00:00

I can imagine it turning bloody right at the end as it starts to scrape the skin off his head.

anescient · 2019-06-16T03:39:18+00:00

I was trying to link to this specific video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4bj6SqgT4SQ

The preview/inline/whatever up there is dopey.

anescient · 2019-06-15T05:24:30+00:00

https://www.cbsnews.com/news/outrage-police-shooting-drunk-driver-paradise-california-officer-patrick-feaster/

"I've got an unresponsive female, I've got a male in the car refusing to get out," Feaster could be heard saying in the dash-cam video.

anescient · 2019-06-15T05:20:30+00:00

Neanderthals making their contribution to the world's web of information.

anescient · 2019-06-13T15:25:06+00:00

Sounds like a job for LiveLeak.

anescient · 2019-06-13T00:52:17+00:00

There's no sound quite like it.

anescient · 2019-06-08T15:47:50+00:00

And don't drive like a tool.

anescient · 2019-06-05T13:10:36+00:00

https://www.almasdarnews.com/article/isis-assassinates-fsa-commander-in-new-drive-by-shooting-photos/

anescient · 2019-06-04T04:54:30+00:00

With the death penalty, I don't understand the expensive Rube Goldberg poisoning machine and electrocution chair and all that noise. It looks like firing squad really gets the job done, swift, on the cheap.

anescient · 2019-05-26T04:58:53+00:00

There is no way something that big should be going that fast on that kind of road.

anescient · 2019-05-26T04:53:42+00:00

Holy shit.

anescient · 2019-05-11T13:15:18+00:00

Locks, probably. Pretty narrow locks, though.

anescient