Nonbinary Short Film by socialistrobot in GenderCritical
[–]Skipdip 3 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 0 fun4 insightful - 0 fun4 insightful - 1 fun - 2 years ago (0 children)
Sex Chromosome Variants Are Not Their Own Unique Sexes by BiologyIsReal in GenderCritical
[–]Skipdip 4 insightful - 1 fun4 insightful - 0 fun5 insightful - 0 fun5 insightful - 1 fun - 2 years ago (0 children)
Keep it coming with the great content! Xo
The sex binary is not a ‘Western construct,’ gender identity is by BiologyIsReal in GenderCritical
[–]Skipdip 6 insightful - 1 fun6 insightful - 0 fun7 insightful - 0 fun7 insightful - 1 fun - 2 years ago (0 children)
Says it so well, and gels with me own personal research into gender across cultures.
Gender is entirely about roles. Cultures with multiple genders tend to be more patriarchal than cultures without them.
In our culture were at a weird spot where feminism has largely done away with gender roles. Theyre not completely gone (yet). What remains of them is as damaging as it ever was.
Because of this, “gender” cant be about roles. When viewed this way it becomes blatantly obvious that it’s about profit driven ideology, mental illness, and membership in a particular subculture.
Saddened by the non-binary / theybie trend by [deleted] in GenderCritical
[–]Skipdip 24 insightful - 1 fun24 insightful - 0 fun25 insightful - 0 fun25 insightful - 1 fun - 2 years ago (0 children)
I feel you, it’s crazy. I did lose people over not believing in it. One told me I “harmed” her by literally just saying “non-binary is meaningless”. I think the harm came from her not being able to argue against that.
My personal stance now is my friends know where I stand. I’m not gonna redefine woman. It means female. Mostly I’m gonna avoid the kweers. If they can tolerate me having different beliefs then great. If they can’t then bye. I’m not a pronoun purist. Sometimes I use them sometimes I don’t. Kind of depends who I’m around and whether they will get triggered by me saying sexed pronouns.
Registrars have right to object to gay marriage, says Labour equalities spokesperson by VioletRemi in GenderCritical
[–]Skipdip 7 insightful - 1 fun7 insightful - 0 fun8 insightful - 0 fun8 insightful - 1 fun - 2 years ago (0 children)
So upsetting. It’s happening right before people’s eyes.
If Twitter was run by conservatives by joijoijoijoijo in GenderCritical
[–]Skipdip 12 insightful - 1 fun12 insightful - 0 fun13 insightful - 0 fun13 insightful - 1 fun - 2 years ago (0 children)
If only conservatives cared about women’s rights and egalitarianism between the sexes. Then it would be perfect.
Talked to my mom about GC views. It was cathartic. by bradjohnsonishere2 in GenderCritical
[–]Skipdip 11 insightful - 1 fun11 insightful - 0 fun12 insightful - 0 fun12 insightful - 1 fun - 2 years ago (0 children)
Haha yes! That generation is general is way more receptive to all this: particularly the straight ones. They haven’t been the frog in the pot in the “queer community” the way some older LGB I know have.
Winning back the Internet by building our own by [deleted] in DecentralizeAllThings
[–]Skipdip 3 insightful - 2 fun3 insightful - 1 fun4 insightful - 1 fun4 insightful - 2 fun - 2 years ago (0 children)
I love it! Thanks for sharing
More Concern Over the Online Art Community by Sistersovermisters in GenderCritical
Yeah that is quite a bit disturbing. Didn’t think it would bother me, but yep it does.
It honestly depresses me that more and more women are opting out of being women. by questioningtw in GenderCritical
Abigail Shrier in a podcast with Megan Murphy said that even this concept of “gender non conforming” is a bit fked up when being good at math makes a girl gnc. We are really backtracking our parameters for what “gender conforming” means.
[–]Skipdip 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun - 2 years ago (0 children)
Honestly, I feel for them too. My grandma is 85 and still is perpetually dieting and worrying about looking young. I used to be like “how can adults get sucked into this”, but then I realized that patriarchal conditioning never really goes away unless we really do the work.
[–]Skipdip 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun - 2 years ago (0 children)
So true. I can’t get off this fkn thing. Especially now with COVID though, there’s not much to go to. Ah humanity, we can do it you gyns 😭
[–]Skipdip 10 insightful - 1 fun10 insightful - 0 fun11 insightful - 0 fun11 insightful - 1 fun - 2 years ago (0 children)
I feel the same way. Women not standing in their power as women erodes our set of role models. It seems like part of this greater denial of femininity that happens among men. Now women do it too.
What we women really need to do to heal is connect with sacred femininity, our female bodies, as painful as it can feel to be associated with it.
I appreciate you sharing that. It aligns with my intuition that it is a place for an individual to escape, to avoid processing the trauma of it all. A healer mentor of mine says “if someone says they are not ready to wake up, believe them” Waking up is not for the feint of heart.
It’s interesting you say “to appease someone”. This same mentor friend of mine said “At the end of the day people just want to connect, they will do whatever they feel they need to to accomplish this”.
To those of you who lost friends when you came out as Gender Critical, would you ever take those friends back if they came to see the truth of transgender ideology and tried to come back to you? by Kai_Decadence in GenderCritical
I think the amount of crow they would have to eat to realize they were duped, would be enough of an exercise in humility that I could forgive them. We’re all doing our best I think. But also to my knowledge no ones been badmouthing me. If they were doing that it’s a good indication they are pretty dysregulated and it might not be a positive relationship to hold on to.
The Massive Effort to Censor “Irreversible Damage” Shows the Trans Debate is Not About Reducing Harm by [deleted] in GenderCritical
“She does think some people are really transgender”.
As I see it.. There is no such thing as “being transgender”. It’s an action, the action of transitioning. If someone does this action and finds relief they could not otherwise find, that makes them “transgender”.
There is no such thing as being inherently transgender. What is there is is severe dysphoria that we currently do not have the ability to cure, so the only viable treatment is transgender protocol.
I feel the trans community is the breaking point of the LBGT community and I'm out. by Huyhuy in GenderCritical
[–]Skipdip 9 insightful - 1 fun9 insightful - 0 fun10 insightful - 0 fun10 insightful - 1 fun - 2 years ago (0 children)
I am also out. I don’t even call myself lesbian because it’s too inflammatory now and people can’t decide who gets to use it and what it means. I just say “I like women” haha. Let the chips fall where they may, I will just go like women on my own.
Sissy porn, the gender movement's dirty secret by BiologyIsReal in GenderCritical
I’m curious how you cured yourself? I agree with what you say about exacerbating. But honestly my theory is the same underlying thing drives boys toward paraphillia as does girls to eating disorders: early/developmental trauma, attachment issues and nervous system dysregulation.
Feeling guilt by Skipdip in GenderCritical
[–]Skipdip[S] 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun - 2 years ago (0 children)
Yeah i think this is the underlying thing that gets me. I am a bodyworker-in-training (cranial osteopathy/BCST and somatic therapy for repairing early/developmental trauma and attachment dysfunction). No matter how accepting I try to be, at the end of the day there is something I just can’t let go: mind/body split.
There is nothing inherent about it. It is a mental illness, a wounding. Having numerous “mental illnesses” myself (as you’ve probably intuited from my posts haha). I don’t think the term is actually beneficial or accurate when describing these compensatory patterns of suffering. “Mental illness” in itself implies a mind/body split. Kathy Kain describes this psyche/soma split as a foundational wound in our culture.
How can there be 'male' or 'female' when humans share at least 80%-90% of their genes with each other? If race is a social construct and is not real because humans share most if not all of their genes with each other, how can biological sex be real and not be a social construct? by [deleted] in GenderCriticalGuys
Yes I was being lazy hah, thanks for the diligence. I think my point still stands?
Ellen Page is claiming to be transgender. What is going on?! by socialistrobot in GenderCritical
[–]Skipdip 13 insightful - 1 fun13 insightful - 0 fun14 insightful - 0 fun14 insightful - 1 fun - 2 years ago (0 children)
Yeah itll probably get worse before it gets better. It’s really sad what this thing is doing to women, and she is such a role model in the LGB world. I feel sad as a gnc L myself, to lose another to this pernicious gender stuff. Oh well!
The thing to remember is that at the end of the day people just want connection. They will do whatever they feel it takes to get it.
I would honestly. My male “nb” friend would need to show some serious self-awareness about straight white male privilege though because I’m irritated with him.
Overall we all make mistakes and get mislead, it’s juman. All we are looking for at the end of the day is connection and we do whatever we feel it will take to get it. So yes, I would take them back. I love them.
[–]Skipdip 22 insightful - 1 fun22 insightful - 0 fun23 insightful - 0 fun23 insightful - 1 fun - 2 years ago (0 children)
This will probably peak a bunch of people.
A romantic love of oneself as a woman. She says it’s essentially a sexual orientation, immutable.. and similar to James cantor, she says pedophilia is a sexual orientation.
My suspicion is that these things are currently as immutable as sexual orientations because we don’t yet have the tools to heal the underlying dysregulation/disorder that caused them.
“I don’t know how any ethical surgeon can multilate healthy bodies” um... literally every plastic surgeon? Lol. I honestly feel like plastic surgery and body mod in general is out of control in our culture. I feel like it’s a way for people to exercise control over their bodies, and often points to a mind/body split.
Overall I agree with you. Thanks for your response
[–]Skipdip[S] 3 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 0 fun4 insightful - 0 fun4 insightful - 1 fun - 2 years ago (0 children)
Ok yes I think you are right. I’ve tried to “go over to the other side” because my now ex gf (has some bpd) was playing around with being trans. I came out strongly gc once I had my own revelations about internalized homophobia and misogyny. She wasn’t having it and kept saying “I have no problem with women, I’m just not one”. Which I had a problem with... as the more masculine one of the pair to begin with. It was like “then what does that make me?”.
Anyway I tried to see their point that GC is hateful and wrong... well, no matter how much I tried to “embrace trans identities”, it just didn’t feel right at a core level. And it didn’t feel right calling her (or anyone else) “they”.
[–]Skipdip[S] 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun - 2 years ago* (0 children)
Ok yes! ESP about that winke point. I actually had a phase of being highly interested and self-studying Native American and tribal indigenous cultures in general. I read extensively from the Native American Renaissance and played around with learning a bit of Inuit and Lakota. These alternative cultures in tune with the sacred feminine really gave me hope that we can return to that type of way... a world in which women can literally be naked and it’s fine. I recently went to verify this as well, the bugis and some other cultures that I briefly skimmed over... first off I haven’t ever seen a culture that had a role for “lesbian” mtfs or “gay” ftms. There is no precedence for this.
Secondly, like you said, I saw no precedent for any of these “trans” roles actually being considered the opposite sex: a winkte is not a woman, neither is a calalai, etc. Buck Angel hit the nail on the head in a recent tweet “a transgender woman is a transgender woman”.
Thirdly, most cultures with more “gender” roles have a role for a feminine homosexual male... this includes the Lakota, please correct me if I’m wrong but I never heard of ftms in Lakota culture. Far fewer also have a separate role for masculine homosexual females. In many cultures this ftm role is a way women can get around limitations and oppression (calabai can go out at night and take “man” jobs).
Lastly, until very recently any tribal culture with any “extra genders” had no access to medical transition whatsoever. That must have really changed the whole game, as our modern trans movement has sprung entirely from our plastic surgery technology. I feel like that is a big thing people are taking for granted.
My personal assessment of many native cultures is that the goal was the actualización of the individual. Some things were separated by sex, but “gender” wasn’t a limitation for people the way it is in our patriarchal culture. The culture existed to facilitate the actualización of each individuals unique gifts. Even if it was a backwards person who does everything backwards. They understood that if everyone is bringing their gifts, the groups has abundance.
I feel like when genderists are looking at these cultures they are doing it from our consciousness, not the consciousness that was actually present in these cultures. Considering that in these cultures, people were so connected to the sacred feminine and embodied, hunters could sense a seal was killed when it was too far away to even see.
Anyway a bunch of good points you have. There is an erasure of women/females going on, and honestly I think the biggest reason men aren’t having the same this, is because women hate being seen as women. It’s really women pushing this tbh. It’s sad.
A lot of trans men are showing up in my dating apps. Hell, I wish I could flip a switch and live as a man. But yeah I’ve been trying to connect to my poom and have been reading this book “Pussy”. It’s been quite emotional accepting this feminine part of myself that I’ve been ashamed of so long. I’m trying to do the work of undoing the effects of patriarchy, which involves opening up and feeling a lot of really painful stuff. It involves... embracing the (sacred) feminine! gasp. Here I am emphasizing my masculine parts and not wanting anything to do with “femininity”. I just feel that TIFs have shut off from that, which is totally ok because it’s really difficult and overwhelming... but sad, and it’s no wonder women feel betrayed by trans men.
3 years ago by Skipdip to /s/GenderCritical from self.GenderCritical
Can you explain why defining sex as the different sized gametes (egg and sperm) is not conflating sexual dimorphism with sex, because I think it is conflating? And can you tell me why sex is binary and is not a bimodal distribution? by [deleted] in GenderCriticalGuys
[–]Skipdip 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun - 3 years ago (0 children)
It doesn’t really matter where we draw the lines on sex. It’s obvious reality endures regardless. There is natural variation, just as some people are born with one arm. But there are only two sexes. Even the most ambiguous intersex condition is a combination of both, and is not a “third sex”.
[–]Skipdip 7 insightful - 2 fun7 insightful - 1 fun8 insightful - 1 fun8 insightful - 2 fun - 3 years ago (0 children)
Get out of your head and into reality. There are two sexes. The sexes are dictated by if you have a vagina or a penis. The vagina makes the egg and grows the baby, the penis fertilizes the egg.
It’s amazing how gender ideology can confuse our brain to literally question the most basic obvious thing.
By the way, it takes 0.2 seconds to know someone’s sex. And you never forget it.
Rad fem lesbian discord
Some evidence that some men can have "women's" brain by Kai_Decadence in GenderCritical
[–]Skipdip 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun - 3 years ago (0 children)
So you are arguing there is a single male brain and female brain? You think each person should get scanned and assigned... like what’s the end game on this
[–]Skipdip 4 insightful - 1 fun4 insightful - 0 fun5 insightful - 0 fun5 insightful - 1 fun - 3 years ago (0 children)
What I have heard is that due to neuroplasticity you can’t really say there is a definitive ladybrain. Because you can’t separate it from socialization. The difference would have to be shown at the infant level to show sexed brain differences. Plus, what’s the end point on this? Each individual person gets a brain scan at 18 and by that is assigned a gender? What the TIM is arguing is that gender identity is determined by biology which is counter to what the TRAs say anyway.
I’m pretty sure I saw some study that confirmed blanchards typology vía brain scans of homosexual transsexuals vs heterosexual trans.
New US study on Gender Diverse: Depression affected 78%, followed by anxiety (62.2%), personality disorder (22%), and post-traumatic stress disorder (14.6%). 58.5% experienced suicidal ideation, 22% attempted suicide, and 36.6% were victims of abuse. by BEB in GenderCritical
Yeah to be honest that confused me as well when I looked at the abstract. But here I think I found the real one:
I heard about it initially on the BisexualRealTalk channel on YouTube. Here is the study he referenced https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/abs/10.1080/15299716.2015.1111183?journalCode=wjbi20
[–]Skipdip 3 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 0 fun4 insightful - 0 fun4 insightful - 1 fun - 3 years ago (0 children)
I’ve read that bisexuals also have high rates of distress. (28% attempted suicide based on one Australian study) I think for this to be a solid argument we have to show that this is not the norm in comparison to any LGB. Because it’s easy for people to chalk this up to descrimination.
Any rebuttals to this? by Skipdip in GenderCritical
[–]Skipdip[S] 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun - 3 years ago (0 children)
Alright you are right. Possible TMI, I have been struggling with the way my community has categorically dismissed me. My close circle seems to be waiting for me to come around. Recently I’ve been starting to question whether I’m wrong to not “respect trans people”. After all, (and I live in a fairly conservative place) gender is all around me, which I hate. It’s from the conservatives and now from my liberal female (and male) LGB friends, who keep talking about “healthy masculinity” and my partner who spends much of her energy in search of a “positive masculinity” so she can feel comfortable as the man she was truly born to be.
What if they’re right that all cultures have gender? (Even matrilocal ones?) certainly when we look at images of tribal people, there is a way the women dress and the men dress. Are there trans people in those cultures as well? Are we erasing them? I’m in a position of having to choose between being a “ciswoman” and being subject to the “female gender” and treated as inferior, or being a “trans non-binary person” and giving up my position.
Am I being too rigid? Am I not listening? Am I rejecting the science? The big credible institutions sure support that sex is a construct. Am I being violent to people when I don’t use their preferred pronouns? Am I like the crazed racist, ignoring reality and deluding myself into believing what I believe by surrounding myself with an echo chamber?
I would have done the hard work on this video, but I honestly couldn’t stomach watching it because I got too upset.
Any rebuttals to this?
3 years ago by Skipdip to /s/GenderCritical from youtu.be
The definition of lesbian: the googoogaga factor by Skipdip in Lesbians
[–]Skipdip[S] 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun - 3 years ago (0 children)
Literally thank you. All I wanted by way oversharing on here is to hear that. I am from a pretty privileged situation that just so happened to be homophobic and sexist. Somehow I internalized a lot around it :/ I finally figured this out, in the midst of this cultural insanity. And now here I am, subjecting myself to this for some reason.
Look, whatever. Their difference from me is that they like men. I just have men-related anxiety.
You know what; I honestly totally respect that. If you don’t want to read about dicks, that is your right and boundary. I get why you wouldn’t. I have always been around straight people (or male gays) and innundated with straight culture and expectations. Lesbian was not remotely an option for me in my mind, I was just “practical” or asexual. Not only that but I grew up in the virulent misogny of male nerd culture. I internalized a rediculous amount of stuff that I am still working out. Its hard and confusing for me as well, but I assure myself: If I was bi, I would know by now. I’ve never had an attraction to a man.
Yes I agree. I don’t like how this push back to the queer homophobia has resulted in needless infighting. Not everyone has fluidity, but some people do. Some straight people do and some lesbian/gay people do.
I am defining fluidity as the ability to perform the mechanical action of intimacy, which is how I’m differentiating it from bisexual. To me a bisexual can go either way and be happy. I could never be happy with a man. I could never be sexually satisfied with a man. I would never choose to be in a relationship with a man, unless it was with a gay man to hide my real relationship. It hurts to be rejected from the paltry remains of the lesbian community. I really do think I am lesbian 🤷♀️ but I have ocd and this preoccupation with if I’m attracted to men is not the only intrusive thoughts I get.
I think bisexual women should cultivate their own culture. Because I agree it is needed. But I have met true bisexuals and I don’t relate to them. I lose interest when the topic goes to men.
If I was bisexual then fine, but I’m not. I really don’t care about men. And the more I heal the less real estate they take up in my mind. If you actually read the whole novel, which I doubt because it was long and you responded quickly, you would see what I meant by “shits and gigs”. I don’t actually desire men when I am physically around them. And I feel nothing toward them, I never have and I can’t imagine ever doing so. But fine if you want it so bad I’m fucking bisexual I guess I should leave.
Don’t read it if you don’t want to. I really don’t care if you feel it’s an over share. I am lesbian. I have no interest or attraction towards men. How you do not see that is beyond me.
[–]Skipdip[S] 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun - 3 years ago* (0 children)
Several years later I was drunk and a nice man asked me to kiss and I was like “eh sure whatever, add another one to my list so I will be cooler.” Eventually he kept asking me to do more thing until we were in his room gonna have sex. I was decently drunk and ashamed of my body. His dick was on the smaller side and uncut. I was like ok cool what do I do? I started jerking him off but he didn’t like what I was doing so he took over. Then he was like “do you want to have sex?” and I’m like “well we’re here now so might as well get it over with”. He put it in and I was like “ok I can sort of feel it, it’s like a vaguely uncomfortable poking, cool look at me I’m doing it. I’m cool now, love me please Lily“. He had some issue so he took it out and I was like “aw damn does this even count? We barely had sex at all.” Then we went to the shower and did something else I don’t really remember. I kind of thought he was gay. He was definitely at least bisexual. He kept wanting to do anal stuff on him and me. I was like “sure on you, why not” but he couldn’t find his plug. He jerked himself off and came and was like “sorry there’s not a lot left, I masturbated a lot today” I was in my head like “oh that’s perfectly alright, you can go ahead and handle that situation yourself you really seem to know what you’re doing”. Eventually we stopped and went our separate ways, like “let’s do this again sometime” “yeah for sure”.
All this time I was repulsed by vaginas. Vaginal liquid was the most disgusting in my head, more disgusting than semen, because penises were normal and cleaner. When I masturbated I never touched my vagina. It freaked me out to touch it. They were just so weird and smelly and gross. I could never picture wanting to touch a woman’s vagina so I knew I couldn’t be lesbian. I couldn’t fantasize about being with a woman, so I would imagine women in bdsm sub situations with faceless males.
I had had a few random drunken one night stands with a couple of women I met at parties. The women were attractive, and I kind of had fun with the first one when we were kissing, but I felt nothing and when I ate them out I was like “ewwww” in my mind. One time I slobbered all over her vagina to keep from tasting her fluids 🙂 if something’s coming out, it can’t go in 🙌🏻.
This whole time I was pining for the love of my life who was this teacher I’d had. I just had to have more sex to catch up to her and then she’d love me. After my first time ever with the first woman ends in a complete dud, she rolls over and says “are you even lesbian?”. I was like “OOF.. what if I’m not attracted to women? What if I am straight?”
I flirtated with a trans woman who was in our little lesbian party group. He was attracted to me and I thought he was a really sweet guy, with a lot of pain. Plus it was edgy and progressive to be with a trans woman to validate him. We made out and it was just the same as every other mediocre male kiss id had. I had no interest in sex with him and drifted away to have other unfilling encounters with women.
When I met my first girlfriend I was like “holy shit she is so beautiful”. Every cell in my body was drawn to her. I didn’t know what I wanted to do since I was repulsed by vaginas, but I knew I wanted to touch her. After months of doubt if she liked me or liked women, and going on a bunch of long walks together trying to figure out if she was into me. Finally I told her I liked her. She said she liked me too. It was another several weeks of pained early-stage covid social distancing, and some contention because my best friend was her best friend, and this friend did not want us together. Despite the forces saying otherwise, we tried every date to push closer and closer, touch more and more.
Finally, one night we were laying next to each other outside in her backyard before a fire because it was cold but we agreed to only hang out outdoors. I reached out to touch her, and she touched me back. We touched more and more until finally my hand went down between her legs. Her vagina was kind of gross and wet. I didn’t know what to do, but she was really experienced and whatever happened she found a way to like it. I was uncomfortable throughout and after, I wiped my hands off on the grass to get the nasty liquid off. She tried to do the same to me but I didn’t really feel anything so we stopped. I was hooked. We started having sex multiple times every time we saw each other. When I finally started to make her come I ascended to the seventh heaven. I never knew I could be so blessed and honored to experience this. It was the hottest most amazing thing I could imagine, and it was all for me to soak up. There didn’t have to be any man, she didn’t need any man there except for just me. There were no men watching behind cameras like in lesbian porn or lesbian movies. No boyfriend or crush. Just me and her, and her doing this all for me without any man around.
Eventually I finally got over literally any remaining disgust about her vagina or her fluids. I was wild about it all. I wanted to do every sex thing in existence with her and I couldn’t imagine ever getting tired of it.
Could I have sex with a man? Yes, I’ve done it before. I don’t see why I couldn’t do it and maybe even make myself come from it. Do I want to do it? On some level kind of. I have a lot of curiousity about it at this point since it’s been built up so much in my mind. Plus I have a lot of anxiety that maybe I do like men, so just to quell my anxieties and get confirmation.. Could I enjoy it? I feel like I could probably figure out a way, and maybe my discomfort around men is some type of attraction after all. Even if it’s not, it would be like two bro’s masturbating together, which could be fine I imagine. I do greatly admire men sometimes, sometimes I love them, and I notice if they look attractive. Maybe these feeling are attraction, after all. Maybe I could be in a straight situation. Men are easy to sleep with they are desperate for you. Definitely not long term. But who knows? I had my vibrator for two years. Most of all, maybe if I did Sarah would think I’m sexy and desirable because men want me too 😎
So I guess I must be bisexual. Either I am bisexual or mentally ill I guess. Well, actually I already know I’m mentally ill with attachment problems. It’s probably my mental illness and my trauma around men that is making me indifferent about men even though I’m bisexual. I couldn’t be a homosexual with some low level fluidity within the category, could i? I’m not a real lesbian, I dont belong in the lesbian community.
I mean I see where you’re coming from. But I don’t really agree, because I know I am lesbian. ~Storytime~
I’ve never felt anything real for a man past puberty. I prefer female vocalists to male vocalists. My attention always goes to the woman in movies with a romantic subplot. I have fallen in love exclusively with women. I have innumerable crushes and attractions all on women. When I sleep with my girlfriend i feel like I could spend eternity there.
Growing up I always ran away from men who were interested in me, even though I accepted dates to the prom and such from them. I would flirt but then avoid them, even if they were objectively attractive. When I think about having sex with men it’s because I want the woman to be jealous and to see that I can do it too (because I am jealous or insecure or whatever). I always get jealous of women’s boyfriends, I’ve never felt jealous of a woman. I consciously picked Ewan MeGregor as my celebrity crush in high school because I felt I needed one too. Meanwhile I am reading a 500 page autobiography on Louise Brooks who is so dreamy, and my favorite movie was Fucking Åmål. But I was straight! I was sure I was straight I was just practical and shy. Once a girl I had seen and thought was cute in cinema club.. came up to me and told me she had a crush on me. I was repulsed and I thought about her vagina like “ew no vaginas are gross, that wasn’t a real attraction, I’m straight” and I told her sorry I was straight. I was weird enough, I was bad at fashion and no girl would ever like me. I always felt spicy and drawn to the pretty smart graceful fun straight girls, who almost always it seemed, had attractive boyfriends. Their boyfriends made me uncomfortable because I knew that I was attracted to them because I was straight. My stomach would tense up because I was attracted to them, and my heart rate would raise. I knew I was gonna start dating at some point but for some reason I just didn’t want to. But also I did want to and I wanted them to like me. Just when they did I wasn’t ready because I was so awkward.
I would imagine faceless male bodies with dicks in my fantasies, or bdsm with faceless males. When I tried to imagine women I couldn’t even picture what to do with them and I was grossed out by vaginas.
Fast forward and I had fallen in love for the first time with a woman, but she was my teacher so it couldn’t happen. Afterwards I was so broken hearted and alone for a bit, but then this hot girl who was way out of my league and mostly straight drunk kissed me because she heard I was bisexual. That was my first real kiss and it was like fireworks. She stopped it after a second and was like “hmm guess I’m not into her after all”. I spent the next year “friends” with her, watching her fuck a bunch of men, hoping dreaming someday we could be together. But in the moment once I left the bathroom at the party I went to a side room with a couch. In there was this handsome boy who had an interest in me, and I wanted someone because I was the only one in my new cool international friend group (of conventionally attractive awesome women) who didn’t have a guy I was seeing or fucking. In fact I had never had sex and I was 19. So I picked this man and he was sweet. We kissed for a while and it was fine. It was like a lone mini firework in an empty warehouse. His lips were dry which I noticed, but I was drunk so I was grateful to have the company and to be cool.
I proceeded to “date” him for half a year. He was a sweet guy. I liked him. We would get together and make out and cuddle and feel each other up, which was sort of nice I guess, but it got old and I’d kind of sit there going through the motions thinking about his chapped lips. Sometimes I really didn’t like his smell. I kept telling him we weren’t in a relationship and he’d be like “wHyYyyyy?” “Why do girls play hard to get?”. In my mind I was like oh I am not playing lol. I would 100% have had sex with him if he wasn’t waiting for marriage. I wanted to have sex with him, so I could not be a virgin and I could catch up with my friends so that Alicia would think I’m cool enough to date her. We all went to clubs and I danced with men and kissed men. One night we were all out and Alicia was dancing with this guy she was fucking, and I was with this other guy who was kind of a creepy asshole but conventionally attractive. We kissed and he teased me and I was just annoyed. Like “what are you teasing me for, I don’t care. Just kiss me”. He asked me in an annoying way to come to his hotel with him, and I was like “no” and I left to go to the bathroom. Then I left the club and walked away starting to cry. One of my friends came out and I said “I think I’m lesbian” she was like “oh, it’s ok you don’t have to be with men”. After that night I went back to thinking I was bisexual, because I must be wrong, of course I could be attracted to men. I was really mostly straight, I just focused on women because it was easier and safer. I was probably not as into men as I was women, because of trauma.
[–]Skipdip[S] 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun - 3 years ago* (0 children)
You seem to be really attached to repulsion as a requirement for lesbian-ness.
Repulsion is a physiological response. I used to be repulsed by snot and poop until I had to take care of young children. I’m not repulsed by penises... I wouldn’t want to put one in my mouth. I am not excited about them. I could probably have sex with one. It would be disconnected sex, but that’s my choice. In your mind I’m not lesbian I guess 🤷♀️
[–]Skipdip[S] 3 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 0 fun4 insightful - 0 fun4 insightful - 1 fun - 3 years ago (0 children)
You really have to take it case by case. I’ve never met a person who did this. Sounds absurd because how can they not be aware that they go gaga for men
Sure if you want to do that. But given the culture that would mean that literally there are no lesbians except for me.
No, that is too simple. In this day and age we have to be discerning. If you had taken me at my word I was “into everybody”.
Anyone else notice a highly irregular amount of anime in trans communities? by [deleted] in GenderCritical
[–]Skipdip 15 insightful - 1 fun15 insightful - 0 fun16 insightful - 0 fun16 insightful - 1 fun - 3 years ago (0 children)
Ah you are always killing it with the links to stuff! I’m so glad your on here lol. Thanks for being such a strong advocate
3 years ago by Skipdip to /s/Trueblackpillfeminism from self.Trueblackpillfeminism
Ok, that’s real, me too. Internal lesbian fire of confidence from overcoming homophobia and misogyny lol
:( so even you don’t have a lesbian space you go to? I’m probably projecting but I saw you in my mind as a confident established lesbian, who probably had a lesbian community somewhere.
I agree, it’s kind of funny in a way because all I need to do to prove them wrong is literally just show them my life haha.
It’s so hard rn. I wish there was a real lesbian space where I could meet self aware lesbians face to face, or even just on zoom or something where it’s not just text all the time. Do you have a lesbian space?
Yeah, but it’s so subconscious that most of the time they wouldn’t even realize they were being pressured. That’s what I was trying to get at.
I agree with all this. She doesn’t say she is lesbian, she says she is a “queer” “gay” “trans man”. There was a short period pre trans where she did say she was lesbian. But now she says it “didn’t work for her”... whatever that means :/
I am not making fun of her at all. She has a really high ACE (adverse childhood experiences) score, and a hard life.
If she acts like a lesbian, and fucks you like a lesbian, she’s probably a lesbian. She keeps saying she is “into everybody” but clearly is not excited by men or their genitals.
Maybe she isn’t, and that’s her journey, but my intuition is that she is. It’s not far fetched at all for lesbians to sleep with men for the reasons you listed.
All I’m trying to say is pOLEASE, can we be nicer to other lesbians? We, especially the younger generation, are in the trenches right now. Yes we need to make sure bi women and straight women aren’t slipping in an appropriating our label. But! We should caution on the side of acceptance, of really listening to people’s stories, not rejection right now. It doesn’t take much listening to hear the googoogaga
I am so tired of having no actual lesbian space where I can talk to other confident, self-aware lesbians. The lesbian experience is often a very isolated one and it’s tragic. I’m tired of this saidit being the only space I have, having to text everything into my dinky phone. I want to talk to people, I want to see their faces. Yet because of the QT invasion there are no safe places in reality. Not even in ducking northhampton. Which is supposed to be the #1 lesbian city in the whole USA. There are no formal lesbian spaces there. What the fuck has this come to? I lived in 2 major gay areas and there was not one lesbian exclusive place for confident lesbians to hold the hands of struggling lesbians so we can heal together and come into ourselves. It sucks.
[–]Skipdip[S] 4 insightful - 1 fun4 insightful - 0 fun5 insightful - 0 fun5 insightful - 1 fun - 3 years ago (0 children)
I love this story, thank you for sharing. I relate to trying to be straight and thinking I could be the best straight because I was so pragmatic. I also did that creepy molesty stuff to women a bit. Sometimes a hug that lasted too long or whatever. Other times it was in my fantasies.
Biology is undeniable but it’s still so easy to miss, or interpret as something else. It’s not like lesbians are born with an L on our foreheads. That would be helpful actually.
If you read my ressponse to yousaythosethings, I tell my story more and wud appreciate ppl hearing it and seeing it I guess, because it’s still a struggle and obviously not a lot of ppl to talk about it with since me being lesbian is “transphobic” now
[–]Skipdip[S] 4 insightful - 1 fun4 insightful - 0 fun5 insightful - 0 fun5 insightful - 1 fun - 3 years ago* (0 children)
Ok well looks like I choose the wrong words. Let’s forget them then, I think you know what I am talking about.
A main point I have, and the reason I keep saying googoogaga instead of “attraction” is because attraction can always be a question, “was that attraction? Am I attracted?” but googoogaga is undeniable and uncontrollable.
I am also neutral on male stuff. I am put off by sperm though, or any other liquids that come from a penis 😬
But then again, back when my attachment trauma and internalized misogyny was really bad I was afraid of vaginas. I couldn’t even touch my own. And I did not enjoy licking those of the women I was having random one night stands with. It took me healing a certain amount of my stuff, coming to terms with my internalized homophobia and misogyny, and being in a relationship with a woman I loved, to discover that I am crazy about vaginas. Bringing a woman I love to orgasm is one of the holiest most incredible things I could ever be blessed to experience. NowI can’t imagine ever being satisfied with a penis. It does seem boring, and I have no interest in getting it off. It would just be about what the penis could do for me.
That being as it is, why am I still so fucking hung up on whether I might secretly be bisexual!? It is an obsession, but it comes from the myriad cultural pressures. Including my homosexual brainwashed friends who are so deep in the QT head-scramble that they can’t see their own noses. And it’s not just them, it’s the entire culture right now. My ducking LGB friends straight up saying that homosexuality doesn’t really exist because “it’s fluid” and “everyone is a little queer”. And the mainstream culture colluding with this.
Ok yeah, I looked it up myself.
I am defining fluidity to mean action. Yes, it is possible for a lesbian to sleep with men. There is your fluidity. Some may seek it out for various psychological and circumstantial reasons. Often this is due to developmental trauma or cultural pressures. But maybe it’s just curiosity or desire for new sexual experiences.
What makes that person not bisexual? There is no googoogaga, it’s a mechanical exercise. Maybe it’s a mechanical exercise with affection and admiration. Like friends shaking hands. But it is lukewarm and will never be anything but.
True. And that is not what I’m talking about. If you want to actually know look at some of my replies
I also don’t know what a FebFem is
Yes, it is a type of internal pressure. They don’t even recognize it as homophobia because they see it as the most transcendent progressive way of all. I would also say that because of the cultural pressures they haven’t fully figured out that they are lesbian (or straight) in the first place. Any glimpse of anything that could be construed as attraction is grounds for “oh I must not be lesbian I guess I like men and should date them too”
And no, what bi means is googoogaga for both. All this percentage bs really doesn’t mean anything. You are not bisexual unless you could get fireworks either way. I have one friend who I think is bisexual because she is crazy about this trans woman. She is my only friend who calls herself a lesbian, ironically. My other two friends I really think are lesbian. One, who has been with like 20 random men and a few relationships with men, has told me point blank she has a “genital preference” for vagina. She happens to have a high level of dysregulation and a really high ACE score.
At the end of the day, I would love them even if they were straight, so it’s not just that I’m trying to build the lesbian ranks. But with all this TQ confusión going on it takes a discerning person to really figure out what we are looking at and who we are dealing with.
Yes! This is a beautiful story and exactly what I’m talking about. I will read the rest but this is what I’m getting at, so I don’t understand how you disagree with my premise.
You were with men and all it could ever be was lukewarm and mechanical. Maybe you were able to come with them, but in a disconnected mechanical way. I too have dealt with attachment trauma which briefly confused me and in fact continues to confuse me. I feel anxiety and have obsessive thoughts questioning if I am attracted to this man or that man. My sympathetic nervous system kicks in around men sometimes and I hyper analyze if that is attraction. Well, I don’t have to ask that at all when it comes to women. There is no question, I literally melt and explode like a million fireworks.
Could I go have disconnected sex with random men to feel wanted and desired? Yes. Could I probably find a way to make myself come from that? Probably.
In my friend group there is so much pressure to be essentially “pansexual” or “fluid”, that friends of mine who I am pretty sure are lesbians are going around sleeping with men. Then they come back and say “yeah... it was fine, but he is just such a boy”. These friends have a tendency to go for trans women because they think “I’m attracted to women so I should be attracted to trans women right?”. “I like all genitals.. it’s about the person” but then when they have sex with vaginas they’re like “oh, right, I like this way better”. Or “I get bored quickly of penises, I never get bored of vagina” or “for some reason I don’t feel shame after I come having sex with vaginas.” It’s pointless.
That’s why I’m trying to turn the focus instead of who we COULD have sex with, to who we actually melt and explode for. That what sexual orientation actually is. We need this distinction because people are confused as hell.
And yeah, in this day and age the majority of people have attachment trauma and developments trauma in general. It’s sad. I am going into the field to help heal people of this. But it’s the truth.
My point is that either everyone is bisexual or something else is going on.
I don’t think this rigidity fits in with reality. And there is a lot of science to back up this fluidity idea.
Being forced to marry a man or raped does not adequately cover the nuanced psychological reasons a straight woman would choose to be with a man, or a lesbian woman would choose to be with a woman.
The whole point here is while a lesbian could (and often are) with men, it is a lukewarm situation. It is not possible for it not to be a lukewarm situation. If it isn’t, then she is bisexual.
Do you get the distinction I am making?
The definition of lesbian: the googoogaga factor
3 years ago by Skipdip to /s/Lesbians from self.Lesbians
This is real feminism by vintologi_se in GenderCritical
[–]Skipdip 10 insightful - 1 fun10 insightful - 0 fun11 insightful - 0 fun11 insightful - 1 fun - 3 years ago (0 children)
The level of disturbed someone would have to be to be sincere about this belief is concerning
For Harriet nails it: WAP and the Spectacle of Sexual Liberation
Review: Females by Andrea Long Chu, Sissy Porn and Trans Dirty Laundry | Louise Perry | The Critic by alttrawl in GenderCritical
“And blank, blank eyes” just ew..
If we put computers in our brains, strange things might happen to our minds by [deleted] in technology
Yes this is what I would call a bad idea
PinkNews CEO thinks a man's right to rent a womb is the same as a woman's right to IVF by alttrawl in GenderCritical
I don’t have Twitter, they don’t look at saidit?
Resources Showing a Correlation Between FtM Transitioning and Internalized Misogyny? by Recycle_Bin in GenderCritical
Just bumping this because it would be great to have more resources on this for sure! Thanks for the post
Interested in an aneurysm? Try understanding this mumbojumbo... Gender compilation! by vitunrotta in GenderCritical
Thanks for this fun artistic exercise! Honestly this is art lol. I like Tragmat. That’s my gender now, all my QT friends. I’m one of you, please love me again.
[–]Skipdip 6 insightful - 2 fun6 insightful - 1 fun7 insightful - 1 fun7 insightful - 2 fun - 3 years ago (0 children)
Please someone tell me how I get on the ovarit 😭 I will do whatever tests y’all require but it’s impossible to get in
Black Lives Matter Activist Wearing 'Justice for Beonna Taylor' Shirt Walked into a Louisville Bar and Murdered Three People by Trulytimes in politics
Okay... so you have active white supremacists and passive white supremacists. “Most people think they are superior” very odd of you to normalize white supremacy like this.
Someone explain this anime shit to me by Femaleisnthateful in GenderCritical
[–]Skipdip 5 insightful - 1 fun5 insightful - 0 fun6 insightful - 0 fun6 insightful - 1 fun - 3 years ago (0 children)
It’s is hilarious to be that men actually identify with these sexist characters. I really couldn’t stand them when I used to watch anime. They are so blatantly misogynistic.
Times: Changing gender to get cheaper but ‘self‑identify’ scheme is off - WE DID IT!!! by [deleted] in GenderCritical
This is great news! If people are going to waste all their energy on gender, there at least should be gatekeeping to keep out at least some of the creeps.
New "I love JK Rowling" billboard goes up in San Francisco by TangerineRabbit in GenderCritical
[–]Skipdip 22 insightful - 2 fun22 insightful - 1 fun23 insightful - 1 fun23 insightful - 2 fun - 3 years ago (0 children)
Love it! Go SF!
I will only lick your ass-pussy if you stop making generalizations about entire groups based on race. But it’s true that liberals are stuck in identity politics which means more oppression = more virtue points. Clearly there are psychopaths of any race. Being black does not make anyone more virtuous or better. It’s about the content of character, not color of skin. It’s true though that he is dealing with a kind of historical trauma that most of us white people just can’t understand 🤷♀️
[–]Skipdip 1 insightful - 2 fun1 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 2 fun - 3 years ago (0 children)
White supremacist is someone who thinks whites are superior. You are clearly this.
Heterosexual shenaniganry by [deleted] in Lesbians
I feel ya lol, ppl can be harsh on this forum. For what it’s worth, I agree. Which incidentally is why I think so many straights are so desperate to be “queer”. They want us to take them in and give them a safe place away from all of the heteronormative bs.
Patriarchy vs. Planet Earth -- Lierre Keith at RadFem Reboot in Portland, OR Part 1 by Skipdip in GenderCritical
Part 2 is linked thru part 1. I found this really fantastic. I’m trying to radicalize all my friends now lol
Patriarchy vs. Planet Earth -- Lierre Keith at RadFem Reboot in Portland, OR Part 1
Open relationships? by Skipdip in Lesbians
Yeah honestly I think you’re right. I’ll just deal for now, it’s a pain to meet people right now anyway. I’m not a fan of apps.
Being a lesbian in this social climate makes me feel so alone. by sickofit in Lesbians
Fine think what you want
You’re Just AGP! – The Lonely Transsexual! by Skipdip in GenderCritical
Yes I definitely agree with the last part of what you said. Are you familiar with the pre and perinatal somatic psychology field? https://birthpsychology.com/
In my opinion this field and the somatic trauma healing field in general has the answers for how to heal the effects of early trauma that mess with people sense of self, and capacity for relationships, among other things.
I was saying that jokingly about my sister but I guess it didn’t come across.
I’m not saying that women who enjoy fucking men are lesbians. But I’m saying there are lesbians who have trauma who do fuck men and that doesn’t necessarily determine their sexual orientation.
Late bloomer lesbians really seem to exist, I am not the expert on this topic, but it makes sense to me. There is such thing as some fluidity within the categories. So maybe that is a definition difference. I use my sister as an example because she is straight but has some fluidity. Not enough to make her bi... and you agree with this. So why is it so hard to believe that this could exist on the lesbian side as well. I kind of do wish you would get into this because as I see it is does matter.
I feel like you really don’t understand what this generation of lesbians is going through and it would be nice if you had more empathy for us. I don’t think it’s fair to say that this is happening in all of my posts. This has happened with this one, and then with the one where I shared my story. And a lot of the people who had knee jerk reactions to that one came around when I clarified certain things. It has been a real struggle for me to come to terms with my sexuality given my trauma and then this QT shit on top of it. As an elder in the lesbian community (and I’m using that term loosely) it would be nice if you could be a bit more understanding. Really the only person I have conflict with on here is you.
[–]Skipdip[S] 2 insightful - 4 fun2 insightful - 3 fun3 insightful - 3 fun3 insightful - 4 fun - 3 years ago (0 children)
For sure, I appreciate that. But what if she needs time away and I am over here thirstier than a camel in the desert
[–]Skipdip[S] 3 insightful - 2 fun3 insightful - 1 fun4 insightful - 1 fun4 insightful - 2 fun - 3 years ago (0 children)
Because there has been a tremendous amount of tension with me becoming gender critical, because she identifies as trans. She has a lot of trauma and BPD symptoms which make for constant drama, even outside of the trans stuff. I am in the field of somatic trauma healing so I can actually provide her with the tools to get better, but she needs time to integrate and take care of herself.
Honestly I am really attached to this relationship but we’ve had struggles with her BPD and now this trans stuff. I appreciate hearing your story about your wife! I don’t think I would be in this position if she was able to be intimate with me. She is the one I want to fuck until the cows come home lol, she is the one I fantasize about on the daily... hold on I’m fantasizing right now 🤤... but she just can’t right now I guess. She needs to do more of her own healing.
Lol yeah, I don’t know. I mean technically I am a spring chicken, but a late spring chicken. I originally just wanted to be with her, but she is dealing with BPD and it’s been really hard for both of us. Plus she is into the trans stuff which caused a lot of drama when I peaked. But she is my best friends best friend so I think there will already be a lifelong connection there. She is getting help, and asked for space from the relationship. If I’m gonna sleep around I think now is my chance. I am in love with her and I wouldn’t want the open relationship to be a thing in general. I don’t think I could handle it if she slept with other people. But she isn’t interested in that. And she has given me permission to do so multiple times. I have a date tomorrow hah...
But yeah at the end of the day I want to come home to her
Does my bisexual girlfriend want to commit to me? by Fox_Whispers2 in Lesbians
My opinion is be up front with her about this. Be really specific about what your concerns are and what you want out of this relationships. You want her to feel comfortable and satisfied with you, you want her to be proud of being with you like you are of her. As your girlfriend she really does owe it to you to be sensitive about lesbian specific issues. Let her in on what the struggles are about being lesbian. Make sure she understands why the lesbian community is skeptical of bisexual women. (It’s not that we hate them, clearly we often love them, it’s what they do to us inadvertently)
Try to be honest with yourself about your own triggers. Is your reaction justified by the situation? Or is it’s intensity out of proportion? That is a sign that what is really going on is an imprint is being triggered. In any case, it’s still important to be honest with yourself first and foremost, and also with her.
Only you can say the answer here because only you have the full context.
i'm just,, really angry :/ by literallyjustvibing in Lesbians
Join the discord for lesbians born after 1994!
"bisexuals are oppressed because lesbians dont wanna date them" cry me a river by lmaonope333 in Lesbians
[–]Skipdip 16 insightful - 1 fun16 insightful - 0 fun17 insightful - 0 fun17 insightful - 1 fun - 3 years ago (0 children)
I think bisexuals are appreciated by lesbian, but lesbians are distrustful of them due to good reason. When you are bi you still have some straight privilege. It’s just facts.
[–]Skipdip[S] 7 insightful - 1 fun7 insightful - 0 fun8 insightful - 0 fun8 insightful - 1 fun - 3 years ago (0 children)
On another note: MezozoicGay (from Ukraine) said that in his experience 65-70% of TIFs are straight. My estimate was that the vast majority of TIFs are lesbian and bisexual. What are you’re thoughts on this? I can link the thread if you want
Sigh, you are probably correct. :/ but not if I have anything to do with it!
I don’t know, I just think it is harmful to put arbitrary gates up on what kinds of experiences lesbian women can have. Lesbians have enough struggle, we already have the highest coming out age of any LGB. Late bloomer lesbians definitely exist.
The purpose of good gatekeeping should be to filter out people who are not actual lesbians, not to force actual lesbians to conform to certain expectations. I feel like you’re approaching it with a fear mentality because you don’t want non-lesbians slipping through and appropriating our label. I totally get that. But I feel like there are many dimensions of some lesbian experiences that you don’t seem to really understand or relate to. That doesn’t make them not dimensions of the lesbian experience. At the end of the day, there is nothing to be afraid of, lesbians exist as we always have and always will. Even if we fuck 10,000 men.
And don’t you hate on my sister!
Can you say more about what u mean about men’s stories? And what do you mean if the tide turns on this movement it will only focus on men’s stories too?
Would love to see it! Thanks for sharing and thanks for posting that MRI study
Yeah well I’m not the expert. I had disassociative sex with women primarily (with a man once) before getting the help that I needed for my attachment trauma.
But I do think you’re being a little harsh/black and white. My sister who is straight had a girlfriend for two years and managed to have some sort of sex (my impression is that she was a pillow princess). She wasn’t “attracted” perse to the body of her girlfriend, but she loved her as a person and as her best friend. Maybe you would say my sister is bi... but she doesn’t even call herself bi. She is firm that she needs the D. The sex she and her gf were having was not “disembodied disassociative” sex. Not in the purest sense anyway.
Also how do u think so many late bloomers put up with it with husbands for many years.