'I used to be lesbian until I fell for man 30 years older – our sex is amazing'

submitted by jingles from (dailystar.co.uk)

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[–]johndoyle 1 insightful - 3 fun1 insightful - 2 fun2 insightful - 3 fun -  (5 children)

Every day I'm convinced the world that we live in is a simulation when I read headlines like this. I still can't believe we used to be fucking apes and now niggas be writing bullshit like this. I just want to wake up and return to monke the modern world is too bizarre. Any of you guys feel that way?

Also lesbians don't exist they're just becky's that can't get chad's attention.

[–]jingles[S] 3 insightful - 2 fun3 insightful - 1 fun4 insightful - 2 fun -  (3 children)

Yes, I am afraid that lesbians do exist.. I am male, and so I am not pushing a lesbian agenda..

There are most definitely people that are sexually and romantically attracted to the same sex and not to the opposite sex.

It is probably the only story in the media that is actually true.

[–]Evola 2 insightful - 2 fun2 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 2 fun -  (2 children)

Why don't they use plastic vaginas then?

[–]jingles[S] 5 insightful - 7 fun5 insightful - 6 fun6 insightful - 7 fun -  (1 child)

The trick to using a plastic pussy is to lube it all up with wd40 or you can just squirt a few mayonnaise packets up in it.

I have been doing this since way back.

[–]Evola 1 insightful - 2 fun1 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

Hey mate there's something over your head.

[–]Vulptex 2 insightful - 2 fun2 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

It's definitely a simulation.