People spend all kinds of money to go to a disney park, then wait an hour and a half, up to six hours, to get on a ride that breaks down constantly. Time and money well spent, eh.

submitted by iamonlyoneman from sfgate.com

sorted by:
top
newinsightfulfun
you are viewing a single comment's thread.

view the rest of the comments →

[–]SMCABwhatever 10 insightful - 10 fun10 insightful - 9 fun11 insightful - 10 fun -  (7 children)

Listen, the entire city of Orlando is a fucking vacuum for your wallet. It's a prison for good parents who just want to make their children's day, even if just once, to make those "memories."

I'm a very frugal person, not to say cheap, because I spend my money, but I personally believe that my only true vote is in my wallet, and so I absolutley do not spent one red cent of my money in places that don't deserve it. To the best of my ability of course.

My daughter made nationals for a sporting event down there a couple months ago, she was very proud and I was very proud of her. I was pissed because it was in Orlando, and I hate that place with a passion, mainly because of Disney and the assholes who line up with their yearly savings to see an autist in a mouse suit walking around. It's fucking insane.

My daughter really wanted to see Harry Potter land, come to find out it's in TWO PARKS at Universal, and if you want to do the whole thing it's a TWO PARK PASS and a 2 PARK FAST PASS, and if you wish to get any rides in at all those are a necessity.

So for three people I dropped a little over $1200 just to walk in the fucking park and ride the rides faster. Which is double what it would have been because HARRY POTTER LAND IS IN TWO FUCKING PARKS!

On top of that the "magical fucking Hogfucks express train ride of a lifetime" that's suppossed to take you between the two harry potter lands was fucking broken, so we had to walk our happy asses all the way to the other park, which took an hour. At this point I'm feeling like Clark Griswold and I'm about to detour to my truck and get my sporting goods and get my family on that fucking train hell or high-water.

I felt buttfucked. I felt like a normie asshole. I felt like such a fucking jamoke.

Icing on the cake, as I'm sucking down my second frozen Butterbeer because my balls are stuck to my legs again, and I have enough swass sauce to make a sculpture of Hermione out of it, the little troll employee manning the new Hagrid ride informs me that my $522 worth of fast passes don't work on the new ride, because, well it's new, as if that has anything to fucking do with it.

Get fucked Orlando. Get fucked.

[–]iamonlyoneman[S] 3 insightful - 4 fun3 insightful - 3 fun4 insightful - 4 fun -  (1 child)

I think my strategy would have been to say

do you have $1200 to go on two rides? No? Me neither

[–]SMCABwhatever 2 insightful - 2 fun2 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

Yeah man, it was a one time thing. If she makes it next year, we're doing the meet, and heading straight out of Orlando immediately to a beach where I'll spend a hundred a day. Like it should be. Going to Florida and not seeing sand is abnormal.

[–]Alienhunter 3 insightful - 3 fun3 insightful - 2 fun4 insightful - 3 fun -  (0 children)

$522 worth of fast passes don't work on the new ride, because, well it's new, as if that has anything to fucking do with it.

I'd probably go full Karen at that point and demand to see the manager.

But I guess they have it buried in the fine print somewhere that lets them off the hook for any reason while also getting to keep your money.

On top of that the "magical fucking Hogfucks express train ride of a lifetime" that's suppossed to take you between the two harry potter lands

Lolol it's so fucking American that you can hype up a train that goes nowhere and people will go for it. I reckon you can take Amtrak from New York to Los Angeles for less than it costs to spend one day in one of those theme parks. Trip of a lifetime my ass.

[–]makesyoudownvote 2 insightful - 2 fun2 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 2 fun -  (3 children)

This article is about Disneyland in Anaheim California though, not Disney World in Orlando Florida. It's a very different experience.

Disneyland is more of a locals spot. It's much smaller and much easier to get in and out of, and not break the bank.

My fiancée and I have been annual pass holders for years. We tend to go almost once a week. Usually on Fridays we will go after work. We have dinner, or just grab some drinks, go on a few rides. Then head home. It's not actually that bad from a price standpoint if you know what you are doing.

[–]SMCABwhatever 3 insightful - 2 fun3 insightful - 1 fun4 insightful - 2 fun -  (2 children)

My bad, still, I needed to tell someone my story. It related at least, haha

It's not really about the money. I have some. I do fine. I didn't hurt myself by going. It's how you get kicked in the balls while spending the money, it makes it a bad experience.

I don't have anything nice to say about giving money to Disney, but to each their own. At least Universal isn't under the Disney flag, that made me feel better. But it sounds like your version is alot more tolerable.

[–]makesyoudownvote 2 insightful - 4 fun2 insightful - 3 fun3 insightful - 4 fun -  (1 child)

Honestly, I really get it. I liked your story and related to it. I feel the pretty much the same way about Las Vegas.

A lot of my friends go to Vegas all the time. It's only a 4 hour drive, but some of my friends opt for flight passes instead where they will fly out about once a month for a weekend trip.

That entire city is designed just to suck money out of you. The more you spend the better time you have. If you try to go without spending a lot, you are not going to have fun, plain and simple.

I like Vegas, and I enjoy going once a year or so, but it always follows the same pattern for me. I am excited to go there. I have the time of my life the first day, maybe two. Then I regret ever coming, because I have spent 3x what I had originally budgeted. Even if I have the money to spare, I feel like I got taken advantage of.

I don't even really gamble so it's not that part that gets me. It's just all the luxury experiences that claim one price then have dozens of up sells along the way if you want a really good experience paired with the fact that you are usually tipsy, drunk, or otherwise inebriated to the point of losing most of your inhibitions. Even without chemical changes the psychology of being there alone makes you feel compelled to say "fuck it" and spend more money than you normally would.

I've never really been to Disney World, from what I can tell it would be a similar experience though. Much like Vegas the sheer size of it makes you feel like your only option is to spend money at Disney stores and shops. You are essentially locked in, and have to spend a fortune to keep having fun. Yes you can go off the strip in Vegas or out of Disney World in Orlando, but it's such a hassle the waste of time alone makes you feel like it's not worth it either.

At Disneyland we rarely spend all that much in the parks themselves. Usually like $40 on average. We tend to eat in Downtown Disney which is like a mall on Disney property, or we go just off property to Anaheim and go to either a restaurant, or In'n'out or Pizza Press or something like that then we can go back into the park. Also we live so close that before the introduced the reservation system for covid, we could just check how busy the park is on the app, and go on a whim if it's empty. We could easily go for like 3 hours, get on maybe 4 or 5 rides and not spend a single cent beyond the negligible gas cost of driving for 10 minutes each way, and the initial cost of the annual pass. I even used to bike there sometimes which would take off the cost of gas too.

[–]SMCABwhatever 2 insightful - 4 fun2 insightful - 3 fun3 insightful - 4 fun -  (0 children)

Oh don't get me started on Vegas. They didn't even wait for Covid to start being assholes, even though their Covid response was like a bunch of monkeys fucking a football, but that's for another day.

I flew to Vegas the day I turned 21 years old, the very morning of my birthday, that was 22 years go now holy shit. I always got free rooms, free steaks, money to gamble, free shit everywhere. It was nice, I'm not big time, I'm not small time, but it felt good to get something back for getting your dick knocked in at the tables, or for taking their money so they wanted it back.

I've been there 22 times. And I've vowed to never go back on my own dime. And I never will. I'm lucky enough to go there on an expense account for work, they always have a trade show I have to participate in at least once a year. So that's my Vegas trip now. They will never see another dime of my money.

I remember going right before Covid happened, the buffets started weekend pricing on Thursday and ended Tuesday. They started charging for parking. I mean, really, you're gonna charge me to park so I can walk in here and lose money. No way. I know valet guys there that used to make 80 grand a year in tips, no shit, and now they barely make anything because the consumer was charged to park, sorry Johnny, ask for a raise, I already paid. I still tip because that's just me, but most everyone does not, and I understand it. Last time I was there I gave a cabbie a couple bucks for lifting all the bags, he nearly hugged me, for something that used to be commonplace.

Ultimately, in the end, they do it because it works. They've built that city for Conventions and expense accounts. And the only thing that will stop it is the committee for these large national associations removing their support and going elsewhere. The Indianapolis convention center, as an example, is huge and could handle any show Vegas can, and it would cost the companies that participate half the money.

Orlando was packed, Vegas was packed when I was there last August, as long as we line up with our loot in hand, nothing changes.

I for one am done completely with it. Staycations and inexpensive cabins on a lake with my pontoon is all you're getting out of me anymore, and if you're price gouging, I'll skip it. No matter what. My kids are old enough now. I'm done.