If my "radical" need for personal privacy with people i actually trust wouldn't limit the amount and quality of information about myself i could post openly so hard and thoroughly (if i could trust this board, so to dream about) :

i could paint a real nice image on how much time i actually spend every day in the woods. Just for you i surely would do it.

I even want to contribute an idea: This sign actually is invisible and pinned on every tree that is part of woods.

If you could change it to "Free jackpoint here for the internet inside your head" sadly most people wouldn't understand it anymore but more humans possibly would visit their local or regional woods more often.

Woods should emit a field that shuts down all electronic and electric devices for its visitors. But sadly they don't do it, so far.