The circle of happiness

submitted by [deleted] from self.whatever

sorted by:
top
newinsightfulfun
you are viewing a single comment's thread.

view the rest of the comments →

[–]Zapped 4 insightful - 1 fun4 insightful - 0 fun5 insightful - 1 fun -  (7 children)

The 5 Love Languages, by Gary Chapman. It helps to show how people react to different actions and how we can do simple things that our spouse can appreciate.

There is also the theory of the "Love Bank". When one of us feels that the other is withdrawing more than they are depositing, the resentment kicks in and is really hard to get back to normal without major work from both sides.

[–][deleted] 4 insightful - 2 fun4 insightful - 1 fun5 insightful - 2 fun -  (6 children)

That book has been applied countless times and I've never heard of it actually solving anything. It's a darling in r/deadbedrooms, whose bedrooms are still dead.

I think I need a training guide instead.

[–]Zapped 4 insightful - 2 fun4 insightful - 1 fun5 insightful - 2 fun -  (5 children)

It depends on how much each person is willing to give. One spouse may give what they want expecting the same in return, but it often takes something else to work on the other person.

I saw that advertisement on another website recently, but with a different drawing. Sometimes a man can dream. I think robots will be huge in domestic situations once they reach that level of sophistication.

[–][deleted] 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (4 children)

It depends on how much each person is willing to give

She agreed to nightly blow jobs. Thanks, Zapped, that was tremendous advice!

[–]Zapped 3 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 0 fun4 insightful - 1 fun -  (3 children)

I'm not trying to be a know-it-all. That book helped with my understanding of human emotion and thinking and also the dynamics of marriage. Like most marriages, mine takes work and there's not a quick or easy "fix". It requires constant attention.

[–][deleted] 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (2 children)

I wasn't being glib. I asked how much was she willing to give. Never hurts to ask.

[–]AXXA👁⃤웃 3 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 0 fun4 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

how much are you willing to give her

[–][deleted] 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Everything.