Guys - How bad is the dating world?

submitted by PencilPusher55 from self.whatever

There was a scene from the Bay Watch movie that shows a relatively normal / below average guy getting what most consider to be a hot girl. The point is that they are leagues and leagues apart, yet he ends up with her.

The comments are teeming with almost all of the same thing. "I've seen sci-fi movies and this is still more unrealistic", "This is brainwashing to keep SIMPS Simping", "This only happens if you're rich", "This just doesn't happen in real life unless you've got money", "Women don't date down. Especially women who are 10s. Especially with men who are like a 5. Hollywood, quit giving men false hope. It's not constructive.", LIFE SPOILER FOR CHILDREN: THIS IS NOT GONNA HAPPEN IF YOU LOOK LIKE HIM AND GET HIS SALARY. , ect.

Now, I posted another thread about name calling and labels. How it's easy to dismiss a sentiment or argument by responding with InCeL or something like that, that puts someone into a box.

These comments are real people. It's reflective of real life. I am not the most in touch person so to speak so I really have no idea what the dating game is like, mainly speaking of men in their 20's.

So tell me, are women this hard to get? Is it the same as it always was? With instagram, Tik Tok, and all of the other social media apps - Women get hundreds of thousands of followers by lip syncing to a song or smiling into the camera while some shitty mumble rap plays. They are overwhelmed with guys and it seems as though simping is even more common than ever.

Ever seen a female twitch streamers comments? If this even remotely reflects the real world.... how do men do it? Because the comments on that video are not really even that comical to me. I see it all across the board, normal guys just giving up on even attempting to ever find a girlfriend with the way our society is set up now.

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[–][deleted] 6 insightful - 1 fun6 insightful - 0 fun7 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Dating is as easy as it ever was: As long as you don't do it online. Girls on Tinder and apps like that imho either are desperate, severely damaged or only interested in the occasional ONS afaic. And if i was a girl i would think of guys stalking me online to be quite creepy and dense.

I can offer a way better oldschool tactic:

You go where women that actually share your interests go (a library, a gym, a dancing school, a demonstration, a pottery course: you get the picture) go and wait for certain glances to happen. Then you start talking to her to check if she actually shows interest in you. Asking open questions same as keeping it casual and not pushing her are key here. Pickup lines and stuff like that are trash in my experience. If you want something serious there is no reason to fuck it up with stuff like that. The more she talks to you the better. But you only are able to actually get to know each other if you share an interest. Then you talk and talk "casually". More than one time. If this checkbox then gets an a reasonable sure ok you actually can ask this person out.

Also: I don't believe that most women that actually are searching for something serious are looking only into the looks of a man. That is why i deny this (Women don't date under their league)-argument of yours. Afaic there are no leagues because beauty and attraction always lie in the eye of the beholder. Which you don't get to know if you don't talk to her. Women that do that are either very young or too promiscuous for my taste. I also never pay for my date's meals or drinks. But maybe this is just me. I don't want to date a women which only is attracted to me by my looks. Imho there is no point in dating someone you don't share at least one or two interests or hobbies with. The same possibly is valid for most women.

[–]Tarrock 5 insightful - 1 fun5 insightful - 0 fun6 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

Dating is a mess right now and it's gotten worse the last couple years. I think the major problem is the social justice shit being pushed and women love to latch onto it. I see so many women with all the tumblr gender and sexuality shit in their profiles. Not to mention all the fucking trannies on there nowadays. This was unthinkable 6-7 years ago. Plus any app with a community discussion area, you can tell that these trannies are porn sick and have that autogyno fetish or whatever it's called and just LARPing out a fetish irl.

A lot of girls on the apps are butt ugly or fat, and that's because modern society is encouraging them to ruin their body with tats and piercings, get fat and dye their hair.

Most women don't know about the twitch, tiktok, etc shit, so simping isn't really an issue. The simping shit is absolutely pathetic. I loved when that whole 'controversy" happened a month or so ago when that Pokemane girl accidentally said she had a BF and her fans freaked out and suddenly unsubbed.

[–]Canbot 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

If a girl is interested in you she will drop the woke shit quick as fuck. Just don't attack her for it. If you approach it with soft criticism, and the "I see where that's coming from, and this is a valid point, but.." she will eagerly listen to reason. Most girls are not unreasonable, they are just easily fooled by leftist's arguments from emotion tactics.

[–]Tom9152 4 insightful - 1 fun4 insightful - 0 fun5 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

My local DA constantly says he believes all women and all accusations go to court.

So women will demand money or they'll cry rape. I haven't paid anyone and the cops dropped each case after a phone call.

[–]asterias 3 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 0 fun4 insightful - 1 fun -  (35 children)

There's a reason why movements like MGTOW exist.

[–]Canbot 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (34 children)

Of course there is a reason for everything, but that does not mean whatever reason you make up is the real one. MGTOWs are self defeating, that makes it a pathological belief. People who have pathological beliefs always have some justification for them that isn't quite right.

If MGTOW was about examining what girls value in order to provide that, and it were successful, that would be a completely different story. But all they do is look at all the superficial differences between them and chads and say "that is why" and use it as an excuse to give up. These are not intelligent people who have discovered anything real.

[–]Waxsimulacra 4 insightful - 1 fun4 insightful - 0 fun5 insightful - 1 fun -  (11 children)

Not exactly. A lot of MGTOW's see the game as rigged with the current legal system and social order. Not only that there are fewer and fewer reasons to have a relationship as time goes on. If you want sex there are plenty of women willing to provide that with none of the headache that comes with long term commitment.

[–]Canbot 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (10 children)

Relationships are not all about sex. A hookup can't provide a relationship, or a partner. After age 30 or so the commitment becomes the point. Having a family becomes the point.

[–]Waxsimulacra 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (8 children)

Unfortunately not a lot of relationships are very fulfilling. Add to that the stress that comes with forcing something that doesn't fit and making compromises to keep your spouse happy, plenty of men are deciding the juice isn't worth the squeeze. You can have female friends. You can have FWB's. But why get married or commit if you're not planning on children?

[–]Canbot 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (7 children)

You should have kids. Otherwise what is the point of your existence? Are you changing the world in some meaningful way? If not, and you don't even produce someone who might, you are just wasting resources.

[–]Waxsimulacra 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (6 children)

Being alive is wasting resources? You should have kids if you want and are up to the responsibility. It's not a task to be taken lightly and to each their own.

[–]Canbot 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (5 children)

How is it not? When you die all your experiences die with you. Nothing is remembered. What exactly are you leaving behind? What difference have you made besides using up resources?

[–]Waxsimulacra 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (4 children)

This is so absurd I can't even imagine how you came to this conclusion. So every great visionary, philosopher, mathematician, architect, author, musician, artist, humanitarian, captain of industry, religious leaders did NOTHING if they didn't squirt out a rugrat?

[–]Canbot 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (3 children)

Are you changing the world in some meaningful way?

Did you even read what I wrote? Or are you just one of these NPC leftists who skims for key words to pick the right pre programmed response? Are you any of those things?

[–]Comatoast 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Sex is still a really good bonding experience and pretty important for a relationship with that in mind, but I'll agree with you. A lot of people are opting out of having families now though, which is depressing.

[–]asterias 4 insightful - 1 fun4 insightful - 0 fun5 insightful - 1 fun -  (21 children)

If MGTOW was about examining what girls value in order to provide that

No thanks.

When female demands become endless, there's no reason to examine them.

[–]Canbot 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (20 children)

So who are these guys who can provide endless satisfaction? Are they gods? There are lots of people dating and getting married. Perhaps they know something you don't know.

[–]asterias 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (19 children)

Marriage is another failed concept that only offers a temporary sense of satisfaction. Usually women end in it when they believe they have found a solid provider who they'll divorce a few years later.

[–]Canbot 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (17 children)

The nuclear family is scientifically proven to be good for society. Children raised in these environments do better on every metric compared to children from broken homes. Even if the parents don't get along. You have literally been brainwashed against something that is proven to be a universal good.

[–]asterias 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (16 children)

The nuclear family is dead thanks to feminism. You can't make a nuclear family without a proper woman. You can't turn a ho into a wife.

[–]Canbot 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (14 children)

You shouldn't take life advice from rap music. There is no reason a girl who has slept around would be incapable of settling down.

[–]Chipit 3 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 0 fun4 insightful - 1 fun -  (13 children)

Huh? Really? You want to settle down with the town bicycle? No way. No man with any self-respect does that. I've known a few men who married the town bicycle, and we all laughed behind his back at what a cuck he was. Including a chuckle from the bride.

Women get a taste for the exciting life. They don't magically become housewives afterwards.

[–]Comatoast 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (10 children)

How is being the town bike the exciting life? I would think one would want to opt out of that, but I guess some people see freedom in it. I know that the modern shit involves being pro-sex, but I would wager there's a lot of women that seek out validation through sex, and if that's the case and you've actually found someone who makes you feel validated, wouldn't that change things?

[–]Canbot 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

Fist off that is a YOU problem. That you are the kind of person who cant see anything beyond chastity doesn't mean there is nothing beyond that, it simply means you lack the intelligence to see it.

Secondly, if you feel superior for having scored the land whale that no one ever wanted to fuck that doesn't actually make you superior, or your catch better than his.

Third, your absolute lack of respect for others does not in any way support your retarded claim that people can't change. The simple fact that age reduces sexual desires, both your own and others of you, means that older people naturally settle down. It's a different stage in life.

Fourth, it is the highly desirable people who have lots of sex (generally speaking) so those are the people who end up having attractive, popular, successful kids. Cope harder with your ugly wife and loser kids.

[–]Comatoast 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

The nuclear family is dead thanks to turbo capitalism. Who makes that extra money up top when both parties are forced to work? The US has terrible fail safes for women. A grand chunk of businesses will offer only the minimum of 6 weeks unpaid postpartum leave, some will have up to 12 weeks. If you're in with a great company, sometimes a portion of that leave is paid, and I'm not positive how short term disability plays into benefits here but that may be an option. Newborns need more time than that.

A newborn through to about 2 months will go through a minimum of 8-12 diapers a day. You don't cheap out on disposables. You will guaranteed have a shit flood run up the back of their clothes, and end up in hell for it. Pampers run $24.99/84ct box--lasting roughly 8 days at an avg of 10 diapers a day. Cloth diapering can be done, but it's expensive as all hell and requires a lot of dedication to laundry, and stain control to keep a good rotation. Newborns also need either formula or breast milk. Sometimes boobs don't participate, and stop producing milk. Sometimes your baby is a turd and refuses to latch, so you'll have to purchase an expensive pump and dedicate a good 30 minute session every 1-3 hours for that. All that failing, there's formula which is depressingly expensive at $20.49 a container for dry mix, granting a mere 41 x 2oz bottles. You can see how that adds up quickly.

[–]Comatoast 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

How does this argument pose when women marry below their own earnings though? (I know that you said usually, simple question though). I think there are definitely certain types that look specifically for a provider, and that's showing up more often in men now too with the mommy gf meme. You're seeing things in a really pessimistic way though. You kind of block yourself from happiness if you can only focus on worst case scenarios, and that keeps you safe from being taken advantage of but also possibly keeps you from finding a partner you can be happy with in marriage.

[–]jet199Instigatrix 3 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 0 fun4 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

I used to say that if you are worried about finding someone because of your looks then watch the Jeremy Kyle Show not romance movies, but it's not on anymore.

Basically it's completely unpredictable what kind of people end up together. The main thing which leads to success seems to be confidence, but that might just be because such people push themselves forward and meet lots of different people.