I don't think people should be forced to use certain language; in my opinion this is more of a matter of politeness, and a gender-neutral pronoun is pretty polite in all cases. I've recently read this article by Richard Stallman today, and I have to agree with his point there:

There are those who claim that we have an obligation to refer to someone using whatever pronouns person might choose. I disagree with that position, on grounds of principle and grounds of practice. I think we should respect other people's gender identification, but which pronouns we use for any particular gender identification is a separate matter — a matter of grammar. We do not owe it to anyone to change our grammar according to per wishes.