Sometimes, I think about life and realize how petty everything is. When I get panic attacks, I sometimes do this "thought exercise" (which technically my brain forces on me & only sends me further into anxiety lol), and I imagine I've died, and I have to answer to God, only to find out God is myself. We're all God. We're all one being experience reality from different perspectives (yeah, I read the Law of One/Ra material when I was a teenager lol, It clicked hard with me and even if it wasn't true, it felt like the correct way to live my life. It's like an expansion pack for "The Golden Rule").

Our little blip here could have been beautiful - it could be a positive, sensory overload of pleasant feelings, tastes, sounds, sensations, love and happiness.. But it's the other way around. I fucked up. We fucked up. We wasted a beautiful a gift. And that thought gives me a lot of anxiety.

It's so easy to be nice to someone, it takes energy to hate someone or cause them serious pain. I will never understand. We have such little time on this planet before we go back to nothingness. But we spend it fighting, on small or large scales. It's fucked. But I always try to be the person I wish there were more of.