Sometimes I brandish my penis like Liono's broadsword and swing it around while yelling Thunder, THUNDER, THUNDERCOCK HOOOOO!!! by [deleted] in offmychest

[–]IkeConn 2 insightful - 3 fun2 insightful - 2 fun3 insightful - 3 fun -  (0 children)

Bless your heart. Isn't that special.

Sometimes I brandish my penis like Liono's broadsword and swing it around while yelling Thunder, THUNDER, THUNDERCOCK HOOOOO!!! by [deleted] in offmychest

[–][deleted] 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Like this

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z7bhdwcAnH0

Don't tell me no one else does this

Sometimes I brandish my penis like Liono's broadsword and swing it around while yelling Thunder, THUNDER, THUNDERCOCK HOOOOO!!! by [deleted] in offmychest

[–]IkeConn 2 insightful - 3 fun2 insightful - 2 fun3 insightful - 3 fun -  (0 children)

Well good.

I'm a virgin by yabbit in offmychest

[–]grassfed 1 insightful - 2 fun1 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

Coomer

I like starting fires and torturing animals by Airbus321 in offmychest

[–][deleted] 2 insightful - 2 fun2 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

Everyone does.

I hate censorship and I hate, that we will suffer solely, because of the stupidity of our leaders by [deleted] in offmychest

[–]fschmidt 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Why almost all successful populations in history become morons is a complicated question. My thoughts on this are here.

I hate censorship and I hate, that we will suffer solely, because of the stupidity of our leaders by [deleted] in offmychest

[–]fschmidt 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

While this is mostly true, I disagree on the core point. The problem is the moronic masses. When the masses become stupid enough, then the sociopathic elite take over. There is a natural alliance between the sociopathic elite and the moronic masses, which is why America's founders thought universal suffrage is a horrible idea. They learned this lesson from Roman history.

But actually this is no longer relevant since the population has become so stupid that there isn't even a significant minority of non-morons left to form a reasonable electorate. It is time to bail out of Western culture.

I'm only interested in the Ukraine Russia conflict because I want to visit Chernobyl and they're ruining my plans. by [deleted] in offmychest

[–][deleted] 2 insightful - 2 fun2 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

This is actually brilliant, and it might just work

I'm only interested in the Ukraine Russia conflict because I want to visit Chernobyl and they're ruining my plans. by [deleted] in offmychest

[–]yelgy 2 insightful - 2 fun2 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

just wear a shirt with the russian flag on the front and the ukrainian flag on the back and walk sideways

I'm only interested in the Ukraine Russia conflict because I want to visit Chernobyl and they're ruining my plans. by [deleted] in offmychest

[–][deleted] 1 insightful - 3 fun1 insightful - 2 fun2 insightful - 3 fun -  (0 children)

It's close to Commie Belarus and Russian borders, there's crazed Islamic Czechians loose in the woods and they're fighting with Azov Battalion Nazis. I'm not sure I'd fit in with my neck camera, sunglasses and sandals.

I'm only interested in the Ukraine Russia conflict because I want to visit Chernobyl and they're ruining my plans. by [deleted] in offmychest

[–]yelgy 1 insightful - 2 fun1 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

just show up anyway

I'm only interested in the Ukraine Russia conflict because I want to visit Chernobyl and they're ruining my plans. by [deleted] in offmychest

[–][deleted] 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

I doubt the usual tourism perks would be available, no hotel breakfast etc...

I'm only interested in the Ukraine Russia conflict because I want to visit Chernobyl and they're ruining my plans. by [deleted] in offmychest

[–]jet199 2 insightful - 2 fun2 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

I think you should just go right now.

I'm only interested in the Ukraine Russia conflict because I want to visit Chernobyl and they're ruining my plans. by [deleted] in offmychest

[–][deleted] 2 insightful - 3 fun2 insightful - 2 fun3 insightful - 3 fun -  (0 children)

If I get bitten by a spider there, I'll become Spiderman.

I'm only interested in the Ukraine Russia conflict because I want to visit Chernobyl and they're ruining my plans. by [deleted] in offmychest

[–][deleted] 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Why do you want to visit Chernobyl?

I tell the truth everywhere I go even if I am hated for it by yabbit in offmychest

[–][deleted] 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Better to say what you think than regret saying nothing later, preach that hateful nonsense my friend

I eat my own poop and other people's poop from porta potties by yabbit in offmychest

[–]magnora7 3 insightful - 3 fun3 insightful - 2 fun4 insightful - 3 fun -  (0 children)

This is a spam thread. Do not post spam threads that contain worthless content. It appears you are deliberately trying to make a mess of this forum which is not allowed. You posted several posts like this in the last day. This is your final warning, spamming absolute nonsense to degrade the quality of this forum is against saidit rules. If you choose to do this again I will ban your account permanently.

I just took the worst shit of my life last night by yabbit in offmychest

[–][deleted] 2 insightful - 2 fun2 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

Literal shit post.

I just took the worst shit of my life last night by yabbit in offmychest

[–]yabbit[S] 2 insightful - 2 fun2 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

My shitty shit produced a glorious shitpost

I just took the worst shit of my life last night by yabbit in offmychest

[–][deleted] 3 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 0 fun4 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Not gonna lie, this is probably the best post you've ever made on this site.

I smell very bad by yabbit in offmychest

[–][deleted] 1 insightful - 2 fun1 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

Really?

I am extremely autistic by yabbit in offmychest

[–]Zapped 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

You spelled artistic wrong. Your performance art is, well, I can't seem to put it into words.

I tell the truth everywhere I go even if I am hated for it by yabbit in offmychest

[–]fschmidt 2 insightful - 2 fun2 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

Diogenes was a liberal globalist degenerate.

I tell the truth everywhere I go even if I am hated for it by yabbit in offmychest

[–]Airbus320 1 insightful - 2 fun1 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

Learn to code

I tell the truth everywhere I go even if I am hated for it by yabbit in offmychest

[–]Jackalope 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

plus points for referencing Diogenes of Sinope. "I'm looking for a human being"

My hands are freezing most of the time by yabbit in offmychest

[–]magnora7 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Get some fingerless gloves

My hands are freezing most of the time by yabbit in offmychest

[–]Jackalope 1 insightful - 2 fun1 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

Actually that is not true. There are many reasons one might have Raynauds. I have it secondarily from Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome

It is actually associated with jobs involving vibration, not sedentariness

From Wikipedia:

Occupation:

Jobs involving vibration, particularly drilling and prolonged use of a string trimmer (weed whacker), suffer from vibration white finger

Exposure to vinyl chloride, mercury

Exposure to the cold (e.g., by working as a frozen food packer)

My hands are freezing most of the time by yabbit in offmychest

[–]Jackalope 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Yep, was going to point this out as well

My hands are freezing most of the time by yabbit in offmychest

[–]jet199 1 insightful - 2 fun1 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

Sat on arse all day disease, more like.

My hands are freezing most of the time by yabbit in offmychest

[–]Zapped 3 insightful - 3 fun3 insightful - 2 fun4 insightful - 3 fun -  (0 children)

I believe in reincarnation by yabbit in offmychest

[–]Vulptex 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

I won't

I used to avoid pooping in the school toilet because it was yucky by yabbit in offmychest

[–]yabbit[S] 2 insightful - 2 fun2 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

wise

I used to avoid pooping in the school toilet because it was yucky by yabbit in offmychest

[–]jet199 2 insightful - 2 fun2 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

My sister will only shit at home because she believes doing it in public loos is rude and inconsiderate.

She won't eat lentils because of this.

I used to avoid pooping in the school toilet because it was yucky by yabbit in offmychest

[–]Jackalope 1 insightful - 2 fun1 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

Gotta agree, any public bathrooms are disgusting. I prefer shitting in my own home too

I refuse to get a job by yabbit in offmychest

[–]yabbit[S] 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

I'm a neet

I refuse to get a job by yabbit in offmychest

[–][deleted] 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

What did you retire from? Do you have any tips like business to open? Or ways to spend spare cash 10-20k to make money?

I am extremely misogynistic by yabbit in offmychest

[–]yabbit[S] 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

I would but this cucked soyciety would throw me in jail

I am extremely misogynistic by yabbit in offmychest

[–]Tums_is_Smut_bkwrds 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Talk is cheap. Let's see you slap some bitches around and then maybe we'll talk.

I did not care for the Godfather by yabbit in offmychest

[–]magnora7 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Related family guy: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0pnwE_Oy5WI

"It insists upon itself"

I did not care for the Godfather by yabbit in offmychest

[–]iDontShift 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

watched five minutes.. turned it off

i'll never know why people liked it, and i don't care

I jerk off 3-4 times a day by yabbit in offmychest

[–]yabbit[S] 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Oh I thought the joke would be a boomer tier no sex after marriage but it just ended up making no sense whatsoever.

I jerk off 3-4 times a day by yabbit in offmychest

[–][deleted] 1 insightful - 2 fun1 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

A farmer goes to his doctor complaining his penis is rubbed raw. The doctor nods knowingly and tells him he needs to stop jerking off so much. The doc says go out and get yourself a wife.

So the farmer does exactly that. He finds a woman, marries her. A few weeks pass and he goes back to the doctor with the same problem.

Doctor asks why are you still masturbating so much now that you have a wife. Farmer goes, she tries, but her little hands get so tired.

I wish I was a little bit taller I wish I was a baller I wish I had a girl who looked good I would call her by yabbit in offmychest

[–]Antarchomachus 2 insightful - 2 fun2 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

Way to show them that you are far more sophisticated than them, a brilliant analysis

My dik is smol by yabbit in offmychest

[–]Vulptex 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

And mine is way too big.

My dik is smol by yabbit in offmychest

[–]thoughtcriminal 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

We know

My dik is smol by yabbit in offmychest

[–]jet199 3 insightful - 2 fun3 insightful - 1 fun4 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

Because it's missing a "c".

I'm a virgin by yabbit in offmychest

[–]fschmidt 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

See prostitutes. Later marry abroad.

I'm a virgin by yabbit in offmychest

[–]yabbit[S] 1 insightful - 2 fun1 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

Nah species have gone into extinction cuz stupid females picked beauty over functionality eg. some species of deer and elk, peacocks, birds with tails too long to escape predators

I'm a virgin by yabbit in offmychest

[–]jet199 3 insightful - 3 fun3 insightful - 2 fun4 insightful - 3 fun -  (0 children)

They have to think of the survival of the species, I'm afraid.

I'm a virgin by yabbit in offmychest

[–][deleted] 5 insightful - 5 fun5 insightful - 4 fun6 insightful - 5 fun -  (0 children)

Try picking up chicks at an abortion clinic, you know they put out.

I have ibs by yabbit in offmychest

[–]goonmessiah 3 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 0 fun4 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Sounds like it’s a choice then.

I have ibs by yabbit in offmychest

[–]yabbit[S] 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

I try but I have brutal adhd so I always relapse back to eating like shit

I have ibs by yabbit in offmychest

[–]goonmessiah 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

If you’re just venting, that sucks.

If you’re interesting in semi-relief or relief stories—Have you tried other diets?

I eat my own shit by yabbit in offmychest

[–]Zapped 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Maybe that's why your pizza tastes so bad.

History Channel - Tulsa Burning documentary by Zapped in offmychest

[–]thefirststone 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

ok, nigger

History Channel - Tulsa Burning documentary by Zapped in offmychest

[–][deleted] 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Get help, you angry, confused, stupid, pathetic, puny, racist POS

History Channel - Tulsa Burning documentary by Zapped in offmychest

[–]outra_pessoa 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Wow, that's terrible, thank god I gave away my TV years ago.

History Channel - Tulsa Burning documentary by Zapped in offmychest

[–]thefirststone 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

THC turned against history when it turned into the Hitler and Aliens channel decades ago. I'm sure it's worse than the mystery channels which turned into "reality" channels after the last writers' strike (when A&E discarded a rich back catalog which one still can't recover for love or torrent).

It's been spiteful shit for longer that you've likely been watching it. I'm reminded of the "get woke, go broke" narratives, where they ignore the long preceding period of failed or spiteful marketing. As if Gilette suddenly decided to suicide its brand, and not that its addition of blades and discounts were utterly failing to provide a useful product at a competitive price. Or McDonald's suddenly removing white men when they spend decades with seemingly blacks-only advertising and piping in DNC propaganda at all hours in their store.


There was a race riot (nigger rape and murder) a century ago here, and it was niggers literally believing they were entitled to more than everybody else because they didn't believe what anybody told them. That's how it feels when I try to recall history. Nothing I do or say matters ever, one bit. All that matters is what some stupid nigger is entitled to, and that becomes the new truth across all media.

There are no race riots. There are niggers.

I'm a black female lesbian Trump supporter by Assgnostic in offmychest

[–][deleted] 3 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 0 fun4 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

it just sucks that I actually have to hide my beliefs

I know that feel. Sometimes the mask gets very heavy and it can be a very lonely feeling - just know you are far from alone in your beliefs and beings. I know "knowing" doesn't make the feelings any better, but caring less about what people think about you does. Then you start to act more freely, and attract more like-minded people into your life. Or not, all depends on the people around you, where you live and its culture (I know I'm not a city person, but I'm stuck in a large city). I think it's most important to stay true to you which is what you're doing, rather than changing yourself to fit into society's cookie-cutter expectations!

I'm a black female lesbian Trump supporter by Assgnostic in offmychest

[–]Assgnostic[S] 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Thanks bro, it just sucks that I actually have to hide my beliefs for the sake of my safety rather than "oh no people will say mean things to me and not invite me to the cookout." It's funny to watch them go hysterical but it becomes less funny when there's a decent chance I'll be missing one of my teeth.

I'm a black female lesbian Trump supporter by Assgnostic in offmychest

[–][deleted] 5 insightful - 2 fun5 insightful - 1 fun6 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

Welcome.

You should stop caring about what others think of you so much. Who cares? Fuck them. It’s your life.

People will always find a reason to judge you; doesn’t matter what race, sexuality or what your political beliefs are (or their combination). Sad troof.

I don't give a fuck if the USPS gets shut down by russkayacabbage in offmychest

[–]Idhavetocharge 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

If you have so many problems why are you using them? I have never had a single issue so lets not break something that works for the other 99%.

Stop complaining and go to a ups store unstead.

I don't give a fuck if the USPS gets shut down by russkayacabbage in offmychest

[–]Drewski 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Yeah, ending the postal monopoly would be great but I don't see it happening.