Not a Single One of the People Giving This Person False Hope is Even a Lesbian or Finds it Relevant to Disclose that When the Poster is Asking About the Perspective of Lesbians

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[–]yousaythosethings[S] 44 insightful - 3 fun44 insightful - 2 fun45 insightful - 3 fun -  (5 children)

Leaving aside why people who are not lesbians are posting on a subreddit called "Femme Lesbians" or at least do not have flair indicating that they are not lesbians but something else, I honestly feel bad for this poster. Of the people responding, their profiles reveal them to be bisexual women and one trans porn account soliciting views.

I am not someone who has anything against bisexual women or any qualms about having a bisexual partner, but what I do have qualms about is bisexual women speaking on behalf of lesbians and giving so-called transbians a false sense of how exclusive homosexual attraction works. This poster is visibly male and a lesbian is not just not going to be attracted to that, and that's not a reflection of the self-worth or humanity of the poster or of the values of lesbians.

I will also note that the poster's wording is interesting as they are exclusively focused on being attracted to "femme lesbians" and not femme women generally, which would include bisexual women. The implication, if this language was purposeful, is that they are more interested in being validated as a woman than finding a partner with mutual attraction. If these bisexual women want to be supportive and look out for the best interests of the poster, they should encourage the poster to expand their dating pool to include femme bisexual women.

[–]Maly_Querent 24 insightful - 1 fun24 insightful - 0 fun25 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

I agree with the whole "more interested in being validated as a woman than finding a partner with mutual attraction" thing. It's as if their whole life their main objective is to be seen as women. They don't care about women, just for passing as one. Like, they will literally take anything that is "female" like jobs, titles, positions, you name it. If all they want is validation, all they will do is change the world so that they can accomplish that goal. I hate this world so much...

[–]Oof_Too_Humid 18 insightful - 2 fun18 insightful - 1 fun19 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

This pursuit of validation as "women" can be so strong that it leads some autogynephiles, who are actually straight men, to seek validation through having sex with men.

According to a reddit sub called r/Blanchardianism, this is called "meta-attraction".

[–]yayblueberries 20 insightful - 2 fun20 insightful - 1 fun21 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

I strongly believe the L needs to be removed from the alphabet soup. The rest of the letters have never done anything to HELP lesbians, it seems like they all want to speak for us and then erase us. I'm so damn done with bi-curious/supposed late-bloomer-lesbians talking for us as well. I've been in groups where they DO talk to transbians like we lesbians are just going to feel sorry for them and accept them into our homes and beds with no problem and that they are "valid." I'm sick of everybody expecting me to be used to make transbians not feel bad about who they are. I want a mutual partner who isn't super fucked up in the head. Is that really so wrong? And yes, they usually ARE fucked in the head. Even if they can be self-confident and feel happy with themselves after transitioning, I would still have to put up with their lifetime of male conditioning which includes things such as a feeling of dominance toward all women, massive amounts of entitlement, and having everything handed to them just because they had a peepee and balls.

And what is this one's problem with lesbians who are butch or in the middle? I'm a relatively femme lesbian and am pretty damn mad that this one feels entitled to only femmes, obviously it's a fetish for him. And yes, "him," this is a man and he will always be one.

Fuck all this shit, I wish I could live in a world where I can just be a woman who loves other women, without this garbage always trying to get in my way.

[–]GConly 16 insightful - 3 fun16 insightful - 2 fun17 insightful - 3 fun -  (0 children)

This poster is visibly male and a lesbian is not just not going to be attracted to that

You saved me the trouble of typing that.

exclusively focused on being attracted to "femme lesbians"

They are props to validate that he is a woman.

If a straight woman let him hump her it would damage his ego.

[–]High_and_Lonesome 13 insightful - 1 fun13 insightful - 0 fun14 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Thank you for pointing out how insidious the language is.