In any disagreement, even if it's not one of their gender or SJ hobbyhorses, they act offended to gain the moral high ground. The ones I know tend to adopt a fake-gentle, almost corporate way of speech while criticizing the tone of the person they're arguing with, acting as if they're just trying to make amends while speaking at length about the "faults" of the person they're speaking with.

I think of it as the flip side of the sweet-aggressive tone you see in the stereotypical southern church lady: "Oh sweety, you're coming off as just a bit frustrated, but we can work it out..."

My theory is that in any population there are manipulative, self-righteous people who use these strategies. They are attracted to communities in moral power. That means in liberal places they'll be SJWs, and in conservative places they'll act super religious. Also note that in both cases they don't actually uphold the ideals they subscribe to: Real trans people are harmed by the obnoxious virtue-signalling "activism" that these people do, while those snide church ladies aren't exactly Christian angels who love their neighbor.