What have you done recently?

submitted by antares from (self.SaidIt)

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[–]SaidOverRed 4 insightful - 2 fun4 insightful - 1 fun5 insightful - 2 fun -  (8 children)

I mentioned this over on reddit when some blackpilled woman said 'you can't change your personality' but I've been trying to do just that. So far the progress was noticeable at first but I've hit some large systemic issues when trying to attack where I think I'll make the most head-way. So rather than get soft-locked, I think I'll just go back to the old incremental gains method of trimming back the edges.

So it is possible, but I've realized again that there are some very good reasons for having 'bad scores' in some of the big 5 traits. And it's not worth wrecking my life to correct all of them.

[–][deleted] 3 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 0 fun4 insightful - 1 fun -  (5 children)

you can't change your personality' but I've been trying to do just that.

I often think about this. There are many things about myself I can change. Sometimes though it's like I'm on autopilot and while I can't stop it, I can see exactly how I'm acting.

I've had a number of head injuries and concussions. I also wonder if that has anything to do with it.

What are you trying to change about your personality?

[–][deleted] 4 insightful - 2 fun4 insightful - 1 fun5 insightful - 2 fun -  (2 children)

Isn't this part of what they push with cognitive behavioral therapy? The notion is that you take a more objective view of behaviors that you would like to change, and once you've seen them it helps to figure out a way to improve.

[–][deleted] 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

The goal in both is modifying behavior but CBT relies on a therapist to convince a patient that their thinking is distorted, to convince them to believe and behave differently. To ultimately stop the automatic behavior.

I accept there are things I can't modify, namely the automatic behavior cbt was meant to stop, and the things I can, and choose to modify are done because I want to. Nobody has to convince me of it.

But that autopilot isn't about rational thought.

[–]goobandit 3 insightful - 3 fun3 insightful - 2 fun4 insightful - 3 fun -  (0 children)

Tell us your problems, let saidit therapize the shit out of you free of charge

[–]SaidOverRed 2 insightful - 2 fun2 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 2 fun -  (1 child)

For one, dangerously low enthusiasm.

[–][deleted] 1 insightful - 2 fun1 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

Have you tried motivational cat posters?

[–]DirewolfGhost 3 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 0 fun4 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

Yeah there is autopilot and there is a gas tank for free will. Putting her in manual burns that stuff. Managing environment and schedule helps with circumstance, and diet + exercise can expand the gas tank. I find internally "punishing" certain thought patterns with manual aggressive thought can help shrink the target and help increase awareness of it as well if its sneaky.

[–]Zapped 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

That's some great advice.