For example, I'm thinking of times when someone on Female Dating Strategy writes ‘I used to be a pickme.’ Because she dated the wrong guys or let them mistreat her. In my opinion, that’s not what a pickme is. Pickmes are specifically hostile toward other women/ controlling of other women.

Lost Girls,

a term I made up, like a female version of Lost Boys the movie. But ‘women’ may be more appropriate. Maybe use both alternately.

She wasn’t a pickme, she was a Lost Girl. Feel free to not use this made-up term, because I don’t think anyone else will. Or feel free to use it.

Ex:

If you’re talking about a nineteen year old who’s just too concerned with getting attention from boys - you’re not talking about a pickme. It’s probably better to not devolve into name-calling when unnecessary. But if you want to identify her as something, “Lost Girl” is a better choice term than “pickme.”

Ex:

Bdsm culture pickmes say or imply that other women are prudes if they don’t practice bdsm or do other things to please their boyfriend. They call them boring girlfriends. Polyamorous relationships and other sexual favors for males are a must.

But she’s not a pickme if she simply likes bdsm, personally, without the pressure and preaching. Consider her a Lost Woman if you disagree with her choice.

I’m into Femdom, just saying that to be honest. But I don’t think everyone should be pressured to be pro-kink. You’re allowed to disagree, and disagree with me as well. Even I disagree with the wider ‘community’ of abusive, sexist bdsm.

That’s what I gathered it was supposed to mean, when I first heard the term “pickme.”

Pickme traits:

They tell you what you have to think. They excuse bad behavior from males. They emotionally prey on victims. They insult women, to make themselves look better to men. They treat other women like competition. They’re passive aggressive toward other women. They stand by misogynist men. They tell you you’re overreacting. Their female friends view each other and women through the eyes of elitism.

Lost Woman Traits:

They just don’t realize that males don’t deserve special attention from a woman. Not unless they’re the rare men who happen to treat us the same way, support us just as much, and really, actually care about our safety, well-being, and women’s issues (and are not just fake feminists for woke points.)

Some say there are no men like that or worth trusting. That's a valid argument.

Dating the wrong guys, casual sex, bdsm, being nicer to males than they are to us, supporting males more than they support us. Laughing off sexist jokes, due to social pressure.

A lot of us are or have been lost women/ lost girls, in some way or another. Obviously I am sort of.

Blurring the lines:

Women who overly praise their male friends, who treat males like they’re overly important. Are they pickmes, or just pickme-ish? And many women who seem like lost girls, are actually pickmes too. The point is not to worry about the definition, but to identify the problem.