Yeah I agree. That's messed up that people said that stuff to you! Obviously you don't "have issues" just because you're against violence. I am sick of people. They can't just make it a rule that everything goes, and you're a prude if you're not ok with that. That is some creepy gaslighting. Anyone who assumes it's ok to assault a woman because it's supposed to be no big deal, it's just "bdsm." Without even asking her if she wants that "bdsm" play, that's committing literal violence.