all 9 comments

[–]Adventurous_Ad6212 3 insightful - 4 fun3 insightful - 3 fun4 insightful - 4 fun -  (0 children)

1.7 pints?.. thats a typical tuesday night for me.

[–]ID10T 3 insightful - 3 fun3 insightful - 2 fun4 insightful - 3 fun -  (0 children)

Rod Stewart set the unofficial record when his stomach was pumped with two gallons of semen.

[–][deleted] 1 insightful - 2 fun1 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 2 fun -  (6 children)

I remember she.

[–][deleted] 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (5 children)

I like your name, you must be an alpha big dog too

[–][deleted] 1 insightful - 2 fun1 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 2 fun -  (4 children)

Satan will kill you. First, he will be your friend, then he will give you things and then he will kill you.

[–][deleted] 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Satan is a great dog name. If I had a chihuahua, I'd call it Satan and throw honey bacon on you. Satan would be friends with you.

[–][deleted] 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (2 children)

No broseph, Satan is the good guy. He just wants to save you from god's wicked tyranny. All he wants is for you to be free

[–][deleted] 1 insightful - 2 fun1 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

Evil is not capable of forgiving.

Notice your friend's attitudes about forgiveness.

They do not speak the language of kindness.

[–]Vulptex 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

The modern notion of satan doesn't exist at all. "Satan" is merely a transliteration of a Hebrew word for someone who accuses or brings charges against someone. God himself is called a satan a few times. In the New Testament they began calling the demiurge/ruler of this world "the satan" because his main goal is to get everyone condemned (and from what I've gathered, therefore be reincarnated into more crappy lives as punishment).

The modern concept of satan is much more like one of the Greek gods, Pan or Hades (iirc, it might be a different one) than anything from the Abrahamic traditions. That or a bunch of teenagers who think they're cool rebels for worshipping their parents' religion's enemy. They're the ones who say he "frees us from God's tyranny" but that role was always attributed to Jesus in ancient times, and the evil god of this world was the satan.